Chapter 9
Nine
LELAND
“Where is she, Etta?” Leland was beyond frustrated at this point. His hands were balled into fists and he was about to throw one of them into the nearest wall.
“I don’t know, Leland. I tried to speak with her this morning, but she wouldn’t open the door. I assumed she needed her privacy.” She almost heaved a sob, but Leland didn’t care. “I’m worried too.”
Wilhem put a hand on his betrothed’s shaking shoulder. “She did need her privacy. You did the right thing. We all know my sister. Tilly won’t open up until she’s ready. She probably just went for a walk or a ride to clear her head.”
“She’s more foolish than I thought if she went out in this weather. Can’t she see the storm clouds coming?” He was practically shouting at them.
“Then go get her,” Wilhem replied coolly.
“What?”
“Just go out there and get her. What are you waiting for?”
“You just said she needed her space—”
“From us,” Wilhem pointed to himself and Etta. “Not from you. You’re the one who messed up, Leland. You need to make this right.”
“Damn right I will.” And he stormed out, saddled a horse, and rode out into the storm.
He’d been riding for far too long before he saw a horse and a body in the distance, huddled under a tree. “Hya!” He galloped toward them and dismounted, rain soaking him to the core.
Tilly was shivering uncontrollably.
“What the devil are you doing here?”
“The h-horse,” her teeth chattered, “is-ss h-hurt.”
Shrugging off his coat, he pulled it around her body. “This won’t help much, but it should do for now.”
It was a testament to how cold she was that she accepted his gift despite her current disdain for him. Though he did notice the lack of a thank you. Unless it was covered up by the rolling thunder, which he doubted.
“We need to get back. You can ride with me—”
“I’m not going anywhere with you.” She turned her back and moved closer to the horse.
“Fine.” He dragged his hands through his hair. “You take the horse. I’ll walk. Just get out of this storm.” Lightning crashed, brightening the gray sky to pure white.
She just narrowed her eyes at him and sucked in her cheeks. “No. I don’t need you to rescue me.”
“Apparently you do, Tilly. Apparently you’ve needed me, or needed me to rescue you, a few times. Can you get over your pride and accept my help?”
“Get over my pride?” She stomped toward him in time with a clap of thunder and another burst of lightning.
“Get over my pride?” She shouted the words this time.
“Does getting over my pride mean sharing you with your paramour? Does getting over my pride mean letting you walk all over it, traipsing a whore across it? Does getting over my pride mean sacrificing my dignity for you? No! No, it doesn’t, Leland.
I’ll never be the other woman. I’m going to be the only woman, even if it means I live alone.
Maybe I’ll join the spinsters in Kisswick.
I don’t care. I’d rather be there than here with you.
At least it sounds beautiful out there.”
“Tilly, you have it all wrong. That letter,” he shook his head, “it was all a lie.”
“That’s what you keep saying, Leland. I don’t know how to believe you anymore. Do you even know how to tell the truth?”
“She—we…”
“What?” She shook off the greatcoat and flung it at him. “Are you going to tell me that she’s lying and that you didn’t go to visit her? Last month? You said you haven’t been with a woman in a year.”
“Don’t cry, Tilly. Please.” He reached out a hand to wipe the streams pouring down her cheeks, but she stepped back out of his reach. His heart squeezed in his chest. The thunder around him mimicked the thrashing of his heart. A burst of lightning lit up the sky again.
“I’m not crying. It’s raining madness in my life, Leland. Just go away!”
“I did go and visit her.”
“See! You’re a liar. Just leave me alone. I never want to see you again.”
“I went to see her to tell her we were done. For the third time. She kept sending letters but wouldn’t take the hint. So I thought if I went to see her that we could finalize it. It’s obvious now, based on her last letter, that didn’t work.”
“How am I supposed to believe that, Leland?”
He shrugged. Helpless. It was the truth, but she wouldn’t believe it. What more could he do?
“You have to take my word, Tilly.”
“Your word?” She scoffed. “The same word that you used to tell everyone that I’m your betrothed. The same word you used to tell a prince—a prince!—that we had an arrangement since childhood. Your word doesn’t mean much, Leland.”
“Don’t say that, Tilly. I would die for you. And I’d rather die alone than be with anyone else. There’s no one else for me, Tilly. It’s you. It’s always been you. It just took me way too damn long to realize that. I can’t lose you.”
And then it happened. Madness. Just like Tilly said.
A loud rumble of thunder followed instantly by lightning. It struck the tree they were under. A loud and ominous snap sounded.
Leland lunged for Tilly.
But it was too late.
Darkness.