Chapter Sixteen
Hunter put his hands in his pockets. It was either that or he was going to punch something.
Hayden and Becket were all smiles, but they were deliberately stretching out the meal.
Luke had fallen asleep hours ago, the women were all yawning but the two of them kept ordering the next thing on the menu.
Willow was upset. He’d seen the surprise and delight on her face when she’d seen him here tonight, so what had happened since then? Had someone said something? Had he done something?
Finally, Willow’s mom leaned forward. “Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m ready for bed.”
Willow signaled the waiter. “Let me just pay …”
“I’ve already paid,” Hunter said as he got up.
“But I invited you,” Willow protested.
“Thanks, Hunter,” Hayden said, looking slightly less irritated with him. “Willow, we are all so proud of you. You are so special, and I hate to see you unhappy. That’s why I’ve been …”
“Rude? Impolite?” Laura laughed, slipping her hand in his hair.
“Okay, yes. But we’re just looking out for you. Hunter, I’ve always liked you, but you live in Colorado now and Willow is in Montana—I don’t want to see her get hurt.”
“What he said,” said Becket.
Hunter got up and put his hand on Willow’s shoulder. “If you’ll please excuse us?”
For a moment he was worried Willow wasn’t going to join him, but pushing her chair back, she got up. “Thanks all of you for being here. I love what I do, you know that, but to have you here to share tonight with me, means the world to me. We’ll talk in the morning.”
Willow’s mom and Cooper shared a look. They’d both also picked up on Willow’s mood.
Jade also got up and touched his arm. “I’ll call you tomorrow. Maybe we can do breakfast or lunch?”
With a quick nod, he steered Willow toward the door. “Let me get a Ride-share car.”
“My place is just around the corner. We can walk.” She looked back over her shoulder. “Will Jade be okay with my family?”
He smiled. “Jade can hold her own, you don’t have to worry about her. Besides, she’s got Wilder with her.”
It was nice to breathe in the fresh air. Willow didn’t pull her hand from his, but she was quiet all the way to where she was staying.
There were other people in the elevator, but ignoring them, he pulled Willow close to him. She didn’t move away, but she wasn’t leaning into him either. What the hell was wrong?
*
The elevator ride took a few seconds, but it felt like the longest ride ever. When Willow finally closed the door of the apartment behind her, she was on the verge of bursting into tears.
Hands in the pockets of his jeans, Hunter walked to the window. “You have a beautiful view.”
“Hunter …” Thank goodness, her voice was quite steady. “I’m sorry, but I can’t do this.”
He turned around quickly, his hands on his hips. “You were happy to see me. What happened since then? Have I done anything to upset you?”
She began to pace. “No, of course not. I … I’ve missed you so much, I couldn’t believe you’re here but …
let me try and explain. I’ve had a strange restless feeling over the last few days.
It’s what usually happens when something is wrong with someone in my family.
Everyone was fine, though. This morning, the feeling intensified, and I didn’t know what it was until after you’d seen the portrait, and you looked at me.
Everything you felt in that moment”—she motioned with her hands, trying to explain—“crashed over me. It was so intense, so strong, I … I’ve never experienced anything like it before.
It’s too much, too intense. I can’t do it, I’m sorry. ”
“Can’t do what?”
She may as well go for broke. “Hunter, I love you, you have to know that after you’ve seen the portraits I’ve done of you.
Because of that, I can feel what you feel.
I thought I couldn’t but for some reason or another, that has changed over the last few days, and now I feel every single emotion you have.
I’m not strong enough to survive if anything should happen to you. ”
He didn’t move but his frustration and pain washed over her. “You love me?”
“Yes, probably since the first time I saw you.”
“And you know I love you, too?”
Her heart breaking, she nodded.
“So let me get this straight—we love each other, but you can’t be with me because you’re scared of what you’ll feel if something happens to me?”
Tears had clogged up her throat, talking wasn’t possible. She nodded again.
“That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard.
Isn’t love supposed to conquer all? I flew all the way here to talk to you because I can’t tolerate being without you.
I know you don’t want to get married, and I’m fine with that, as long as I can be with you.
Yeah, I’m in Colorado and you’re in Montana, but I was hoping we could work something out so that we can see one another regularly but now you’re telling me you’re too scared to feel too much. ”
Tears were streaming down her face. “I can’t do it, Hunter. Every time you’d leave, I’d be devastated. And what if something happens to you? It’s all just too much, don’t you see?”
“No, damn it, I don’t see, I don’t understand.
I’ve waited my whole for someone I can truly connect with and then I found you and fell in love with you, but now we can’t be together because you don’t think you could handle it if anything happens to me?
I know your feelings run deep, that is one of the things I love about you.
You wouldn’t have been able to make all that beautiful art, that portrait of me, if it wasn’t true.
You can’t hide from ever feeling pain, surely you know that? ”
His heart, like hers, was breaking into tiny little pieces. As wave after wave of grief crashed over her, she crossed her arms, trying futilely to protect herself.
“I’m sorry,” was all she could manage.
For another moment he looked at, his indigo blue eyes bright with tears before he turned on his heel and walked out of the apartment.
Sagging down on the nearest chair, she let the tears run freely down her face.
*
For a moment Hunter stood still on the sidewalk outside the apartment building to catch his breath. He was hurting and so angry he could punch something. Taking out his phone to get a Ride-share car, he began walking.
He wanted to get back to his hotel and try and get a flight back to Denver as soon as possible.
Staying here when Willow didn’t want to see him was not an option.
With his eyes on the sidewalk in front of him, he ordered a Ride-share car, giving the name of the restaurant where they’d just had dinner.
“Hunter?” asked Jade.
As he looked up, his sister, Wilder, and the Westons were all still standing outside the restaurant.
Jade frowned. “What happened?”
Damn it to hell, he didn’t need this as well. “I’m going back to Denver.”
“What the hell, man?” Hayden snarled.
Cooper stepped forward. “She sent you away?”
Throwing his hand in the air, Hunter nodded.
“I love her. She loves me. For whatever reason though, that seems to be the problem. She’s afraid of feeling pain when something happens to me.
I don’t understand it, but that’s what she says.
” Swallowing against the lump in his throat, he knew he had to get away from here quickly.
“All I know is she doesn’t want me in her life. ”
Fortunately, the Ride-share car arrived at that moment. “This is my ride. I’ll see you at home, Jade, Wilder.”
Without looking at the Westons again, he got into the car. He had one more stop to make before he left.
A while later, he got out in front of the gallery where Willow’s exhibition was.
“Please wait for me, I won’t be long.”
“Will do.”
With long strides Hunter entered the gallery. He was taking Willow’s paintings of him, back home with him. She loved him. Even he, who was no expert on art, could see it in every brush stroke. Both portraits and the other one of him on his horse were going home with him.
If he couldn’t have her, at least he’d always have the paintings to remind him she loved him.
*
With a start, Willow sat up. The sun was streaming into the living room. She was still in the same chair where she’d ended up the previous night. With a groan she got up slowly. Her whole body ached, whether from the strange position she was in or from all the crying, she didn’t know.
A loud knock on the door startled her. Her phone had rung a few times last night, the family had knocked on her door, but she simply didn’t have to energy to move.
They were back, as she’d known they would be. Picking up her phone, she walked to the door. Greg had also called and had left several messages. She’d phone him back later.
Her mom and her three sisters-in-law were at the door.
“Willow, sweetheart,” her mom cried as she hugged her.
“I’m making coffee,” Ellie said as she walked past her.
Rose lifted the bag in her hand. “We’ve bought breakfast.”
“I got ice-cream,” Laura said.
Touched, Willow followed them to the small kitchen. “I can make coffee …”
Another loud knock sounded on her door. “That’ll be Jade.”
Willow inhaled sharply. “I don’t want to see her!”
Her mother was already moving toward the door. “Well, she’s here. Like us, she’s looking for answers.”
Seconds later, a much-less-friendly Jade than the one she’d met the previous night, joined them. “Good morning, ladies.” Inhaling deeply, she turned to Willow. “I don’t know what your case is, but I’m so mad at you—you’ve broken my brother’s heart.”
Wildly, Willow looked around but every face turned in her direction had one expression on it—confusion. Jade was clearly also angry.
Her phone rang. It was Greg. “Sorry, it’s Greg, I have to take this.” Grateful for the short respite, she moved to the bedroom and closed the door.
“Hi Greg,” she greeted him.
“Willow! I have news and I hope you won’t be mad.”
She sat down on the bed. “What happened?”
“I don’t how to tell you, but the three paintings you didn’t want to sell have been sold.”
“I told you they’re not for sale!”
“I know but the guy you were with, Eden says it’s the ex-fiancé, showed up here late last night as we were locking up.
He simply walked to the paintings and took them down.
I tried to call you several times, but you didn’t answer and he …
well, he insisted. He paid double what we’ve been offered before. ”
For a few minutes, she was speechless.
“Willow?”
“I’m here. It’s fine, Greg. Don’t worry about it. Thank you again for last night, I really appreciate all you and Eden have done.”
“We’ve had so many requests to host you again, I hope you’ll use us again in future?”
“Yes, of course, thank you. I wanted to stop by this morning, but I’m leaving for Montana as soon as possible. Please thank Eden for me too?”
They spoke for a few more moments before she ended the call. Feeling like an old woman, she walked to the bathroom. She had to take a shower.
Ten minutes later, dressed in jeans and a top, her bag packed, she hurried back to the kitchen.
“… probably why she told him to leave. She feels every emotion of the people she loves,” her mom was saying.
Everyone looked up as she walked in.
“You look better,” Ellie said. “But you’re still so pale. Come and sit down, I’ll make tea.”
“I’ve told Jade about you and Cooper and Luke,” her mom said.
Willow grimaced. “Now you know why we’re called the weird Westons.”
Jade looked even more confused than before.
“I don’t understand. I mean your mom has explained your Irish sixth sense and I understand you feel what your loved ones feel, but I still don’t get why you sent Hunter away?
You all live on the ranch, Hunter told me, so I assume you live with everyone else’s feelings and emotions every day? ”
“Yes, we do,” Willow nodded. “That’s precisely the point—I can’t add anyone else to that list. It gets to be too much.”
“But why? Do you have a sort of breaking point?” Jade asked. “I’m sorry I’m asking, but I’m trying to understand.”
Willow looked at her mom, but she was also frowning. “I’m not sure what you’re asking.”
“Hunter said you sent him away because you don’t want to feel his pain. But you handle your family’s pain, and I presume all their joys as well.”
“Yes, but …”
“So, what happens when you’re overwhelmed with their emotions?” Jade asked.
“I cry, okay? Is that what you want to know? I cry ugly tears and my heart breaks. I can’t do it for one more person.”
Jade had more questions. “So, it’s something you can switch off?”
“What do you mean?”
“I’m trying to understand why you sent Hunter away.”
“No, I can’t just switch if off, which is why it can never work between us. When our brother died … I nearly didn’t make it.”
Jade looked Willow straight in the eye. “But you did and here you are with a sold-out exhibition in a gallery in Seattle. If you can’t switch off what you feel, what’s the point? Won’t you still know what Hunter feels?”
“Well, yeah but …”
Getting up from the table, Jade picked up her bag.
“You know, Hunter has always said he’d only get involved with someone when he could have the same connection with that person as the one our parents have.
He tried a relationship once before. She turned out to be quite unstable.
After that he promised himself he wouldn’t get involved with someone with unresolved issues again.
And then he met you—beautiful, talented but with so many unresolved issues.
But you’ve sent him away. Again.” Her eyes filled up with tears.
“Damn it, he loves you. Do you know how rare it is to find someone who’s had no interest in art whatsoever up until this point, willing to cross state lines to attend an art exhibition because he loves the artist?
You’re much stronger than you think, I don’t know if anyone has said that to you, but you should hear it.
” Turning on her heel, she lifted a hand.
“I know, I’ve said too much. I’m leaving. ”
She stormed out of the apartment. For a few moments everyone was silent.
Laura cleared her throat. “What about that ice-cream now?”
“A good idea,” her mom said as everyone chuckled. “Shall we go shopping tomorrow? I noticed a beautiful boutique on my way here. It’s Christmas in ten days’ time, don’t you think we could do with something outrageously red?”
Tuning out their voices Willow poured herself a cup of coffee. The shower had done wonders, but she was still hurting. She wasn’t hurting just for herself, but also for Hunter.
Jade’s words kept running through her mind. Unresolved issues? She was weird, okay, but she didn’t have issues, did she? And okay, yes, she couldn’t switch off what she was feeling, Jade was right. But she wasn’t strong enough, damn it.
It was time to get back home.