Chapter 20
Throughout the summer the Oh Boy! rumour mill gathered momentum, and talk of a reunion built to a crescendo of frenzied speculation as the band dropped ever more overt hints that it was happening.
Their social media posts became less coy and cryptic as the weeks passed.
Roly watched with increasing annoyance as they posted recent photos of themselves together, or nostalgic throwbacks to their glory days, arms wrapped around each other as they stood on stage, taking their bows at the end of a performance.
And he wasn’t in a single one of them. It was as if they’d completely obliterated him from their history.
Some of the fans, God bless them, continued to lobby for him, relentlessly asking under every picture:
Where’s Roly?
When Zack posted a photo of the four of them with the caption:
All the Boys back together again
several people had commented,
not ALL the boys!
They’d even started a ‘WewantRoly’ hashtag. He was touched by their loyalty and love, especially knowing he’d done fuck all to earn it.
The tension and hysteria mounted to an almost unbearable peak.
And then, at the beginning of July, it happened: the reunion was officially announced.
It started with Zack, Alex, Liam and Charlie all posting the same photo on Instagram and Twitter – the four of them waving goodbye to the crowd at their farewell concert, with the caption:
The Boys are back.
Roly was glad. He’d been on tenterhooks for so long, waiting for the other shoe to fall, it was a relief when it finally happened.
But it was the relief of the hypochondriac who finally gets diagnosed with a serious illness, or the paranoiac who discovers his colleagues really have been conspiring against him.
It meant no more worrying and wondering, no more fighting an invisible enemy that might be nothing more than a figment of your imagination.
This was real; it was happening. Now that he knew what he was dealing with, he could begin to tackle it.
* * *
‘How are you feeling about it?’ Ella asked him later over dinner. The announcement of the reunion had been on the news this morning, and it was all over social media.
‘What do you mean?’
‘Do you still want to try to get back with the band?’
‘Of course.’ He looked at her aghast. He couldn’t believe she had to ask. ‘I mean, that’s the whole point of all this, remember?’
‘I know, I know,’ she said quickly, appeasingly. ‘I just thought you might have changed your mind.’
She thought he should change his mind. That was what she really wanted to say. ‘Well, I haven’t. Why would I?’ It pissed him off. She was supposed to be on his side, 100 per cent.
‘I don’t know.’ She looked down at her plate, twirling spaghetti onto her fork with unwarranted concentration. ‘I just thought, you know, since you’ve been working with Phoenix, doing your own thing—’
‘So now I have credibility because of being associated with a proper band, and I should do something better.’
‘That’s not what I mean.’
‘I think it’s exactly what you mean.’
‘You just seem so happy the last few weeks – happier than you ever were when you were in Oh Boy!’
‘Seriously? You don’t think I was happy being in the biggest pop group in the world?’
She put her fork down and turned to face him squarely. ‘No, I don’t.’
‘Yeah, you’re right. It was a miserable existence – travelling all around the world, winning awards, playing giant stadiums. It was shit being at the top of my game, and the money really sucked. I’m much better off working in a crappy cafe and doing music in my spare time like some hobbyist.’
‘Yeah, I think you are. You never seemed that happy back then, when you used to call me.’
‘That’s because I only called you when I was down – when I was feeling lonely or a bit homesick and there was no one else around.’
‘Right. I see,’ she said tightly.
He sighed. ‘I didn’t mean it like that. I just meant, obviously I wasn’t messaging you when I was at a party or on stage or being taken out to some fancy restaurant. You weren’t there, so you only saw one side of it.’
‘I get that,’ she said softly. ‘I do. But that was still a whole side of it.’
Maybe she was right. There had been a lot of those nights.
He remembered how he’d felt those times he’d called her – anxious, lonely, paranoid, homesick.
He’d been lost, in need of grounding, craving the reassurance of her voice on the phone.
But it was only because the highs had been so high, wasn’t it?
For every action there was an equal and opposite reaction.
The crash was the price you paid for the elation of being on stage, the high of knowing you’d played a blinder, the adrenaline surging through your body when you stood at the centre of all that light and sound and joyful energy, thousands of fans all screaming for you – there had to be a comedown from that. The crash was worth it… wasn’t it?
‘And the music you’re doing now,’ Ella was saying, ‘it’s so different—’
‘Different to the Oh Boy! crap, you mean?’
‘No!’ She was vehement. But that was exactly what she’d meant and they both knew it.
‘I don’t mean to criticise—’
‘Don’t, then.’
‘I thought you’d want to keep doing your new stuff, that’s all. It’s so good. And you seem to be really enjoying it.’
‘I am. But I want to be back in Oh Boy! more.’
‘If you’re sure that’s what you really want.’ She shrugged.
‘I am.’
‘Okay. So, what do you need to do to make that happen?’
No one in his life seemed to be behind the idea. He knew they were just looking out for him, but it still annoyed him.
‘I don’t like how they treated you,’ his mother had said worriedly. ‘They weren’t good friends to you when you were struggling.’
His nan had been more forthright, as always. ‘Why would you want to get back with that shower of shites who abandoned you when you were in trouble?’
‘I don’t blame them. They had no choice but to cut me loose. I was dragging them all down,’ he’d retorted.
‘But you weren’t happy, Roly.’
They all said the same thing. He tried to tell them that was the drugs and the booze.
It would be different this time. He’d appreciate it, enjoy it; he wouldn’t throw it all away.
But they didn’t get it. He’d just have to show them.
He’d get back with Oh Boy!, and he’d be on top again, and then they’d see; they’d understand.
* * *
For the rest of the week he waited for a call from one of the band, approaching him about the reunion, offering him a second chance.
None came. It was everywhere now. Social media had gone crazy, and the former band members were being interviewed on the radio and TV – all of them, except him.
All the news channels doing the story included little snippets giving a quick background to the group – a brief history of their meteoric rise to fame, their record-breaking album sales, chart-topping singles and sell-out tours.
There were invariably unflattering brief mentions of him – his drink and drug problems, failed solo career and recent money troubles.
He watched Zack being interviewed about the reunion in a piece on the evening news.
‘It’s not so much a reunion as a reboot,’ he said in a clip. ‘We’re acknowledging the fact that we’ve all grown up and moved on, and so have our fans. That’s why our new album will be called Oh Man!’
‘And will Roly be joining you for the reunion tour?’ the interviewer asked.
Zack gave a coy smile. ‘Roly hasn’t shown any interest.’
Yeah, Roly thought, mainly because I wasn’t asked.
‘It looks like it’ll be just the four of us, the line-up as it was when we broke up. It’s been a long time since Roly’s been part of Oh Boy! He’s moved on; he’s doing his own thing.’
Yeah, what would you know about that? Twat!
‘If he was up for it, would you be open to him joining the reunion?’
Zack shrugged. ‘Never say never.’ He gave a sly smile to camera. Roly knew he was just saying that to tease the fans, keep them on the hook. ‘But, honestly, I don’t think Roly’s interested in being a member of the group again.’
Well, how do you know if you don’t ask? Fucker!
Clearly, if he wanted this to happen, he was going to have to make the first move.
He called Liam first. ‘So, this reunion—’
‘Yeah, sorry about that, man. I’ve been meaning to call you.’
‘I mean, it’s a shock, hearing that on the news.’ They didn’t know Charlie had given him a heads-up and they didn’t need to. They clearly didn’t give a fuck if he heard it first on the TV.
‘I take it my name didn’t come up, then?’
‘We just… didn’t think you’d be interested,’ Liam mumbled.
He took a deep breath, bracing himself. He’d just have to ask; try not to sound too desperate.
‘Well, I am. So, how would you guys feel about making it a real reunion, the original line-up back together again.’ He tried to sound bouncy and cheerful, like he wasn’t that bothered either way.
He kind of hated himself right now. ‘I mean, I’m sure the fans would love it. ’
Liam sighed. ‘You know if it was just up to me…’
‘Yeah, yeah.’
‘But Zack…’
Oh sure, blame it on Zack, you spineless dick. At least Zack would have the balls to speak for himself.
‘You should talk to him, though – and the rest of the lads. It’d be a laugh if you were with us.’
‘I will. I’ll talk to Zack and the others.’ There was an awkward silence. ‘Look, I know you guys had to cut me loose. I was a liability, I get that. But I’ve changed. I’m clean and sober now.’
‘I know. Congratulations!’
‘And I’ve been working on some new songs…’
‘Oh, really?’ A wary tone crept into Liam’s voice.
Roly laughed, pretending not to be offended. ‘These are actually good. Not like that shit on my first solo album.’
‘I thought it was unfair that album got such a battering. There was some good stuff on it. The production really let it down.’
‘Thanks.’
‘But maybe don’t lead with the song-writing when you’re talking to Zack. You know what he’s like.’
‘Yeah.’ He did. He knew exactly what Zack was like.