21. Shannon
CHAPTER 21
SHANNON
That afternoon, only the team goes to the rink.
Whatever the reason for that decision, I’m grateful, because I’m not up for playing cheerleader—even if means spending the afternoon with Emery, who couldn’t leave fast enough this morning when I said I didn’t want to watch Cutting Edge .
Now she looks wounded all over again. Spare me from the emotional seesaw of a twenty-four-year-old youngest sibling, I think. Except I know my cattiness is coming from a place of inappropriate jealousy.
So much for being kind, Shannon.
Fuck.
This morning, Ani had been with me in wanting to skip the movie and just hang out at the lake. And Kiley had been easily distracted with podcast talk.
I know how to sway a group decision so everyone sides with me. But I wielded that like a weapon, and that was wrong.
“Do you want to watch Cutting Edge this afternoon?” I ask her.
Her expression brightens. “You wouldn’t mind?”
I’m planning to disassociate through the entire movie. But making Russ’s girlfriend happy might be the only good thing that comes out of this weekend. “I don’t mind.”
While we make popcorn, I call a few beauty spas in the area. And by the time the movie is over, two aestheticians have arrived to give us all matching pedicures.
This is what I do best. I take care of others. I see what people need and I make that happen.
Ani can’t stop raving about the movie. “You were right. It’s not really a love triangle at all,” she gushes to Kiley.
“I told you.”
Across from us, Harper is sitting next to Emery and Becca, and they’re talking about dinner tonight. And cooking in general.
“It’s a shame you aren’t in Hamilton,” Becca says. “I’d love to take cooking lessons from you. Right now Hayden does most of the cooking when he’s home, based on what he’s learned from the team nutritionists, but it’s pretty basic.”
“More chicken and sweet potatoes than you know what to do with?” Harper asks, laughing.
“Yes!”
The newlywed puts her finger to her lips. “Let him just keep doing that. If he’s going to be one of the clean-eating players like Kieran, that’s a Him Problem, not a You Problem.”
Kiley snorts. “Says the girl who eats ice cream for dinner.”
“Second dinner, come on,” Harper teases. “Sometimes it’s the only thing I want at the end of a long shift.”
“Do you have to hide it?” Emery asks.
“Nope. I don’t know where his willpower comes from, but Kieran literally doesn’t care that our freezer is stocked with six kinds of ice cream. There’s a tub of sugar-free raspberry sorbet in there for him, too, and that’s all he touches. And only if his macros allow it.” Harper smiles fondly. “He did eat a fair amount of good cheese in Italy, though.”
Becca giggles. “And Italy goes higher on the list for our honeymoon.”
Emery leans in earnestly. “If you like those kinds of Mediterranean flavours, there are a lot of chicken dishes you can do that satisfy both your desire for something new and tasty, and Hayden’s need for dinner to primarily be protein and complex carbs. You can email me his nutrition notes from the team and I’ll make some easy dinner suggestions.”
Unexpectedly, I’m taken back eight years, to when I first moved in with Max before our wedding.
It was the end of the season, and his team was on the cusp of not making the playoffs, although they did in the end. In hindsight, it was the worst possible time of the year to disrupt his routine, but I thought we were in love, and my lease was up.
To celebrate, I went grocery shopping and bought everything to make a nice meal. I was a working model at the time, so it wasn’t like it was unhealthy at all. But Max had gone off on me, accusing me of trying to sabotage him.
It was our worst fight ever, and I almost moved out again. I almost called off the wedding, but he was full of remorse two days later when they won and two other teams lost, clinching his team’s wild card spot in the playoffs.
Ever since, I’ve let him direct what we eat at home, and ninety percent of our meals are either prepared by a chef or delivered by a service, which a lot of other players do, too. So I convinced myself it was fine and normal.
Now I know it’s not, but I still cling to hope. I would love to make my husband dinner—but I’m terrified he won’t like it if I do. So I make him smoothies instead, because I know that makes him happy.
Hot, bitter tears well behind my eyelids and I lean my head back, pretending to be relaxing, until they pass.
“Hey, they’re heading back,” Kiley says, looking at her phone. “Ty just texted me. Apparently there’s a party tonight down the lake. Oh, it’s the guy who sold Russ the boat. Shan, I think his son has that podcast I was telling you about.”
I don’t remember, because as soon as Russ came back, I lost track of our conversation.
Harper makes a little sound under her breath that catches Kiley’s attention, and they wordlessly exchange some kind of lifelong best friend message.
“I don’t care about going to the party,” Kiley says out loud. “It won’t be the best venue to network, anyway. We can go home tonight if you want.”
“Wait, what?” Becca gives Harper puppy dog eyes. “Why?”
“Kieran pointed out that I’ll need to run some errands tomorrow before going back to work. The day after is my first shift at the hospital after taking the summer off for the wedding,” she says apologetically. “Sorry to break up the party early. But the guys weren’t going to train tomorrow anyway, so…”
“And we drove up with them,” Kiley adds. “No party for me.”
“It’s okay,” I say under my breath. “I can’t see Max wanting to go, either.”
Right on cue, the front door opens and the guys start to stream in, disrupting what was probably our final moment of girlie peace together.
It doesn’t feel like we did enough bonding.
Although Becca and Emery are again in deep discussion about food, so maybe they did, and I’m just the odd one out.
I turn back to Kiley and raise my voice to get over the din. “We’ll get coffee soon and finish talking about ideas for the podcast.”
Which is unfortunately the same moment my husband strides in.
Max looks back and forth between Kiley and me. “What podcast?”