Chapter 16 Georgina
GEORGINA
“He was such an asshole!” I say to Alessandra. And, of course, I’m talking about Reed.
It’s my graduation party. A few hours ago, while clad in a traditional cap and gown, I accepted my diploma, posed for a smiling photo, and became the first person in my family to graduate from college.
And now, my small extended family and a few longtime family friends have gathered in my father’s two-bedroom condo in the Valley to celebrate.
At the moment, Alessandra and I are standing in Dad’s small kitchen by ourselves, sent in here by Aunt Marjorie to slice up the cake.
But since this is Ally and me we’re talking about, we’ve long since forgotten our assigned task, and we’re doing nothing but gabbing, gossiping, and laughing together.
All the things we always do when we get together, whether in person or on our phones—but especially in person.
And especially when it’s been months since we’ve been together in the flesh.
Alessandra leans her slender hip against the counter, her blue eyes shining.
The late-afternoon sunlight streaking through the kitchen window is bringing out the auburn highlights in her dark, curly mop and highlighting her glorious freckles.
Her smile is as sincere and warm as ever.
Her lavender aura every bit as peaceful and serene as usual—every bit as much as my blazing-red aura is fiery and passionate.
“Maybe you hurt Reed’s feelings and he was just, you know, lashing out as a defense mechanism,” Alessandra says, causing me to snort-laugh.
“I’m serious,” she persists. “From what you’ve described of your chemistry with him, and the crazy fireworks that went off for you when you kissed.
.. I don’t know, honey, maybe you’re underestimating the fireworks that went off for him. ”
Again, I snort.
But Alessandra won’t let it go. “Even if Reed’s rich and powerful and older, and used to banging supermodels—”
“Actresses, mainly, I think. Probably models, too. But actresses and daughters of famous people seem to be in most of the photos with him.”
“Okay, whatever. My point is Reed is still a man. And men fall for you, Georgie. That’s a fact. It’s your superpower.”
I scoff. “Men want to have sex with me.”
“Only because you push them away emotionally, so they’ll take whatever they can get.”
The image of Shawn’s phone screen that fateful morning pings my brain.
The memory of how I stumbled across those sickening strings of texts and photos—the exchanges between Shawn and several women that made it painfully clear he’d been running around on me for quite some time, with multiple women, when I’d been nothing but faithful and supportive.
And, worst of all, he’d done it all while my life was falling apart and I needed his love and support and faithfulness the most. I feel a deep ache remembering my hot tears I shed that horrible morning.
.. and then a glint of pride, even though I probably shouldn’t, thinking about that bad thing I did when my tears turned to fury.
“I haven’t always pushed men away emotionally,” I say. I run my fingertip through a blob of icing on the corner of the cake and slide my finger into my mouth.
Alessandra sighs sympathetically. “I know, honey. I’m just saying maybe it hurt Reed’s feelings, more than you realize, when he found out you had an agenda the whole time, so he acted like a dick to mask his hurt feelings.”
I put my palm up. “Okay, you gotta stop now. You’re crediting Reed with way too much humanity.
The man thinks he’s a god among men, the immortal ruler of everything he surveys, and he was simply pissed I wasn’t falling at his feet like all the other mortal girls.
I didn’t hurt his feelings, if he has them.
Did I bruise his ego? Probably. But that’s it.
Feelings weren’t involved for either of us.
He made it clear from the start he wanted to bring me to his house for nothing but sex, and I made it clear I was super down for that plan. The End.”
Alessandra pops a bite of cake into her mouth. “Don’t sell yourself short, Georgie. You have a way of making people feel something. It’s your gift. The gift of genuine, and often instant, connection.”
I shake my head. “Not this time. If you met Reed, you’d understand. He’s unapologetically on the prowl. He flat-out said he didn’t want to ‘date’ me, only ‘seduce’ me.” And tie me to his bed posts.
“He actually used the word ‘seduce’?” Alessandra asks.
“He sure did.”
She chuckles. “Wow. Was he wearing a suit with a skinny tie and holding a gimlet when he said it?”
We both giggle at the old-school imagery. But, if I’m being honest, my laughter is tinged with wistfulness. Regret. Yearning. Because, damn, Reed rocked that old-school, sexy word—seduce—like nobody’s business.
“The crazy part is,” I say, “Reed didn’t sound like he was doing a Madmen parody when he said it.
Somehow, it came across as nothing but hot.
” I bite my lip. “Actually, after being subjected to so many drunk fuckboys and their fumbling attempts at hitting on me, it was thrilling to have such a suave older man come on to me like some kind of old-school movie star.” I sigh at the sudden flood of memories wracking my brain.
The cocky look on Reed’s face when he said he didn’t plan to date me.
The way he called me Cinderella. And, of course, our amazing kisses.
.. Oh. I suddenly realize Alessandra is staring at me, her eyebrow arched. “What?”
My stepsister flashes me a snarky look. “If you could see your face right now... Georgie, you don’t hate Reed. You still totally want to screw him!”
“No, I hate him with the fiery passion of an erupting volcano... and I still totally want to screw him.”
We both burst out laughing.
“But don’t mistake hate-lust for genuine feelings,” I add.
“Not on my end, and certainly not on his. He flat-out said he’s ‘non-committal’ about relationships.
Which, by the way, is a lovely way of saying he’s a commitment-phobe.
Which is great with me, of course. I told him, ‘Hey, you’re non-committal? Cool, dude, because so am I.’”
“That you are.” She takes another bite of cake and snickers. “Sounds like you two are exactly each other’s types, huh? Or, at least, Reed is yours: emotionally unavailable and smoking hot.”
Sighing, I pick up a fork and steal a bite of cake off Alessandra’s plate.
Because, really, what can I say to that accusation?
Reed is, indeed, precisely my type. The most perfect example of it I’ve ever encountered.
A glittering paragon of suave, cocky, unattainable male perfection, with a side of assholery, like nothing I’ve encountered before.
“I’m sorry, Ally. I can’t believe I screwed things up so badly for both of us.
I wish I’d handled things differently that night. For both our sakes.”
“It’s that Italian temper of yours,” she says, rolling her eyes. “Getting you into trouble, once again.”
“I know. I’m sorry.”
“I’m kidding. You have nothing to apologize for, especially not to me.
If Reed was rude and disrespectful to you, then I’m thrilled you told him off.
Never think you have to take shit from any man, even a rich and powerful one, especially not to help me.
My time to shine will come soon enough, baby girl.
I know it. And when it does, I won’t take crap from anyone.
And I certainly won’t prostitute out my beloved sister-from-another-mister to get ahead. ”
Oh, my heart. If I didn’t already love this beautiful girl, I would have fallen head over heels in love with her now.
I look out the window of my father’s small kitchen at the cloudless blue sky, trying to gather my thoughts.
Ever since I got home from Reed’s the other night, I’ve felt a powerful ache growing inside me.
An overwhelming sense of regret gathering steam.
And now, I can’t help wishing I could rewind the clock and do things differently that night.
“The thing is... ” I say. “It’s not like, before Reed implied I was a whore, I’d thought he was my Prince Charming.
It’s not like the horrible things he said to me outside his house shattered my illusions about him. ”
I look down at my hands, feeling my cheeks redden with shame.
I’m not proud of myself for wishing I could rewind the clock and follow Reed into his house that night—where I’d then let him tie me up and fuck me like an animal for four hours straight, in exchange for him listening to Alessandra’s demo.
But, if I’m being honest, that’s exactly what I’ve been wishing these past few days, now that I’ve had some time to reflect.
“What are you saying?” Alessandra asks, her eyebrow arched.
“I’m saying... Reed already had a horrible opinion of me that I wasn’t going to shake, no matter what I said or did.
So, in that case, why did I even bother trying to convince him my intentions were pure?
I should have kept my eye on the prize and done exactly what he expected of me—fucked him as payment for him listening to the demo.
At least, that way, we both would have gotten what we wanted out of him. ”
Alessandra smiles. “Actually, Georgie, it sounds to me like you did the one thing you could have done to change Reed’s mind about you. Plus, bonus points, you did it in style—with your two middle fingers raised to the sky. So classic.”
I giggle. “You should have seen the look on Reed’s face as I was driving away. He was so fucking pissed at me.”
“Hey, ladies.” It’s my father, coming into the kitchen.
And his voice makes us girls both straighten up.
Dad strides across the small kitchen and puts his arm around my shoulders.
“Aunt Marjorie sent me in here to ask about the cake. She suspects you two girls have gotten to chatting and completely forgotten why you came in here.”