Chapter 18
She’d given up trying to keep her blowout intact.
Hair back in a bun, the sweet soreness lingering in every step she took etched a soft smile over her face.
Before, she’d force herself out of this space.
Now, she was welcoming the changes. As frightening as embracing it was, she’d decided she was going to let it happen.
She welcomed the subtle changes she could see.
Shoulders not hiked up to her neck, her face void of the scowl and her eyes starting to shine again.
Day by day, the fear she gripped so tightly to seemed to dissolve, piece by frightened piece.
Remedy never had the vision of her flourishing.
All she saw from her lenses was survival.
She just had to make it to the next day and everything would be fine.
Going along to get along would never get you anywhere you were supposed to be. Remedy was finding in each passing moment that her path was already laid out for her and she only had to walk it. Not walking it meant the life had left her body and she’d fought too hard to stay alive.
“Mm,” Erys groaned softly. That lopsided grin pierced his cheek with a dimple. “Back to the bun I see.”
“Safe to say we should give up the blowouts if you’re going to hold me hostage in here every night.” Her eyes automatically found his in the mirror.
“The blow out is cool. I can dig the wild curls though. I’m down with whatever you down with. I just want you comfortable,” Erys assured.
“Mm, put it on the man one time, he starts talking a new language,” Remedy sassed, finishing up her morning routine with all the things Erys’ brought over from her room.
He smiled, not fighting its spread over his face. The subtle lick of his lips made Remedy roll her eyes and try to fight the smile that mirrored his. “Can’t taste you and that’s going to present itself being an issue for me.”
“Franklin, please,” Remedy teased, rubbing the residual product into her hands trying to wiggle past him. “I can’t be on your face every second of the day.”
Erys’ tug on her felt natural. Her body against his felt like that was where it belonged. “While I would love for you to just smother me with that gushy all day every day, Strawberry, I’ll settle for a kiss.”
“I didn’t take you as the lover boy,” Remedy quipped, looking up at him. “Who knew you had it in you.”
“Amazing what comes out when it supposed to,” he muttered against her lips.
A series of slow intentional kisses to her lips, a few swipes of his tongue against hers, Remedy could feel the pieces of her past melt away.
Every touch from Erys was done with care.
A smack to her round ass and a squeeze forced a groan from him. “Good morning, Mouth.”
“Good morning. I think I might be partial to Strawberry but that would mean I’m getting soft sooo probably not,” she teased, walking away. “Ernie still snoring?”
“Foxxy Girl put him down. Let me show you something before he gets up and takes all of your attention,” Erys said, motioning to the door.
As if her feet had been led by him for years, they followed without much thought.
Out the room down the stairs, her fluffy slippers trekked behind his long strides into the second garage housing the classics.
In between an old school Impala and a Cutlass was Ernie’s restore Candy Red Cadillac De Ville.
Remedy took all three cars in and smiled. “Like daddy like son huh? Ernie is going to love this. You got to spin him around in this tonight.”
“That’s the plan, you coming with us?” Erys posed.
“If there’s room. You know there’s going to be some half-naked women in here in a few hours shaking ass and popping pussy. You might forget about me,” Remedy teased.
“You know that’s not my thing. First night, I was staring at your ass coming down the pole. Quite literally,” Erys joked. “Mean, pretty ass.”
“What can I say? May taught me all I know,” Remedy laughed. “Crazy that my lessons in womanhood came from my grandmother and women in prison. Never my mother. They taught me how to take care of myself, how to look like something even if I felt like nothing.”
“They did a good job. You got something on you that’s undeniable.”
He leaned on the Impala and looked down at her. The gaze so soft she could’ve mistook it for anything else other than a caring expression. She looked away, focusing on the cars and the empty spot at the end.
“What’s going down there?” she posed, attempting to move the conversation elsewhere, where her overthinking wouldn’t come out to play.
“Nahhh,” he trilled, hooking her chin and bringing her back center. “You heard what I said?”
Softly she hummed, “I did.”
Erys swiped his thumb over her chin coaxing her lip out. “What did I say?”
“They did a good job.”
“What else,” he urged, eyes pinned on her in the softest glare she’d ever experienced.
“I got something on me that’s undeniable,” Remedy repeated.
“One of these days, you’re going to say that shit like you believe it. Yeah, watching you come into yourself is going to be some shit we’re going to love to watch.” Erys placed her arms around his shoulders. “That and being comfortable with touching yo’ nigga.”
“Oh, you’re mine?” Remedy equal parts joked and wanted to hear that affirmation again. “Possessive shit?”
“All the way that way. Act like you know it.” He placed a kiss to the bridge of her nose.
“And to answer your question, I got a lot of Ernie in me. Sometimes more than I care to acknowledge. My love for cars is all him. My control is all him because there’s no way he was pimpin’ through Trae Way and kept his shit intact like that.
On the flip side, I got some of that nigga shit too.
The alpha male, beating on my chest. Not fully tapped into my emotions to recognize what’s what. ”
“I can see that. You doing something about it?”
“I am. I got something in my hands that requires me to be better. A softer, more self-aware version of myself.”
“You got to stop talking to me like that,” Remedy moaned.
“Why?” he chuckled.
“I might believe it.”
“Believe it, know it, feel that shit because I’m deadass serious.”
“Well, if that’s the case, come help with this Pimp Day,” Remedy said, biting a grin moving away from him.
“If you mean decorate the patio, have his bag of money prepped, and pull the food out the fridge. I already did it. Cherie raised me, Rem. I know a thing or two.”
She switched away and threw over her shoulder, “I think she did a good job.”
The two moved around the space in harmony. Them needing one another was becoming more evident. Remedy’s nervous system was calming and recognizing safety. Protection she more than deserved.
Remedy’s attention turned from Erys to Ernie easing down the stairs.
No hello, no good morning. “Where the bitches at?” was his first question.
“Pops,” Erys buzzed with slight laughter. “Good morning, happy birthday.”
“It’s my nigga day. A pimp party. No music and the only one in here that got some pussy was you. What’s good about it?” Ernie grumbled.
“Happy Nigga Day, Ernie. I made you catfish and grits. The girls will be here in a little bit but you cannot be seen like this,” Remedy said, waving the spatula over his flannel sleep pants with the fly unbuttoned and white tee.
Ernie paused his frustration for a moment to ask, “you got me a suit?”
Erys chimed. “You got him a suit?”
Remedy beamed. “You both know I got a suit. I’ll help you shower and get dressed and by the time we’re done, the party will be ready for your entrance. Sounds good?”
“Sounds like a good ol nigga time,” Ernie said, smiling sitting in his seat.
They ate and shared a few laughs and while Remedy got Ernie ready, Erys cleaned up and followed her instructions to make sure the food was tended to properly. Ernie pulled the pearl white sequined jacket over his arms and grinned.
“You outdid yourself with this one, Cherie. That red one you got me was nice, this shit?” he grunted. “Got me feelin’ like I’m that nigga.”
Remedy smiled, holding his cane and dusting off his shoulders. “Anything for you.”
Ernie looked at her in the mirror. The look so complex Remedy couldn’t gauge it. It wasn’t until his bottom lip trembled and he reached out for her. She grabbed his hands and welcomed his embrace.
“I’m going to do everything I can do for you and that baby,” Ernie spoke just above a whisper.
Remedy closed her eyes and rubbed his back knowing that the lapses in reality were one of the signs that that silent monster of a disease was progressing.
But today wasn’t the day to harp on that.
She was going to make today the best day for him, even if he wouldn’t remember it later.
She pulled away, dabbed away the tears on his cheek, and smiled.
“Let’s get you ready,” she buzzed, not having the heart to correct him with the truth.
The truth was, she’d given up the idea of having children.
Her body wouldn’t hold them but she’d cross that bridge when she got there.
Today was about Ernie, not taking a deep dive into all the things she moved through.
Fully dressed, half the cologne bottle emptied out and his hat tilted, Ernie strolled out the room like he was in his prime. Remedy watched as he floated down the stairs meeting Tone at the bottom.
“Ay, say Ernie, I found these ladies outside waiting for you,” Tone greeted, dressed just like Sweet Lick Ernie.
Ernie grinned. “Yeahhh, all y’all come with me. I want to see some ass shake.”