4. Chapter 4 #2
"I can send you a few links." Evie gives me a resolute nod, like she just made up her mind about something. "Or if you don't want to, I can write up a report."
"Would you mind doing both?" I say. "The report will give me some documentation, and watching the videos will give me some ideas."
"Of course." She smiles. "You will notice I tend to work with the people I have the strongest relationships with. While the other Senior PR Executives and their teams work with everyone else, I find that working with people I know well helps for my kind of projects. It makes things… smoother."
I smirk. "Your fiancé and his group of friends."
"I'm not exempt," Pen adds. "Being married to Leon and all."
Well, at least we're talking about it.
I sigh. "It's natural, in a way. I can see how it makes it easier— if everyone is good at being professional when it's needed."
"We're all good at that," Evie says. "It would be understandable if you don't feel the same way about them… or at least not all of them."
Her face remains open, with some humor to the line of her mouth, even as she clearly holds back. She may be implying something about Dom here, but isn't saying it in as many words.
"I feel neutral about all of them, of course.
" I twirl my pen some more. "But working with people means leaning into our best skills whenever possible.
Sometimes that means working with people you already like.
Sometimes, it means working with people you…
someone with whom you'd rather keep your personal distance from. "
The sun is shining so bright into the office, it's getting really hot in here. I stop myself from using a folder to fan myself. Mentally, I cross my fingers they won't guess how hard it is to keep fighting memories of Dom, when I'm trying to appear exclusively managerial.
And still my heart drums relentlessly, to be thinking about him despite myself.
The way he grounded me. All those beautiful experiences he gifted me, that I've never shared with anyone else since. That feeling of being known, and trusting, like I wouldn't be afraid to trip and fall, because he'd know before I knew, and he'd catch me.
"It's about being fair and knowing where the lines are," Evie says. "It's not immediately clear each time, but I promise we're all mindful of it."
"That's what matters, right?" I succeed in pulling up a smile. "Selena wouldn't allow the current socialization policies if she thought it was causing a mess. You know, the ones where as long as there's no power dynamics, socialization is welcome. And I can stay professional."
Cora and I discussed it when coming here, because she can't socialize with everyone the same way I can, due to her position. But, me? I can be friendly. I should be friendly, if that's the culture in the organization.
If she teased me that I could technically reminisce with Dom if I felt like it, that was just Cora joking around.
What a terrible idea that would be. Not only would it stoke the embers of a love that burnt too fast and destroyed too much, but it would also have my family doubting if I ever planned to go back to England to finally take my place at the head of the foundation.
I know my parents. They would decide I'm unreliable and naive.
And they might even cut me out of my plans and the life I want to lead in London.
The family charity means a lot to all of us.
It's the legacy of Mom's family and their diplomatic history.
It's how we'll do our part to influence the structural policies her parents wanted to change.
They wouldn't trust me with it if I can't prove I can take care of it alongside Maisie.
Gah. I need to recalibrate. No backtracking to a nostalgic time with someone I loved desperately. No wrecking my working relationships before I begin, just because they're friends with my ex. No letting my past influence my present, even less my future.
"This year will be great," Evie says. "You'll see."
She smiles as she checks the time and begins collecting her things.
"Working together will go well," Pen adds, getting her things too. "I know these people. You can trust them."
"All of them." Evie's smile grows. "I promise."
Right. Because I will have to work with Dom, too, not only his friends. Who may or may not know more about me than I'm comfortable with. Especially if Dom did the talking, and he filtered some of that content with his own point of view.
"Ready?" Evie asks toward Pen. "The guys will be almost ready in the locker room."
"Yep. Let's go," she answers.
"Can I come with you?" I ask, and pretend I don't see their shock.
I have to plaster over the cracks, and the sooner the better. But I don't explain my plans.
All I do is follow them to the training area of the Thunderdome. Crossing my fingers Dom is there, too, and willing to talk to me.
We're going to work together more closely than I thought. I need to make sure he can stay professional too. We can't fight again where people can see. It's time for a productive conversation. I won't be taken seriously if I'm the subject of gossip.
This is the start of my new life. I can't let my past get in the way of everything I want.