36. Mai
Chapter thirty-six
Mai
I rushed into Thomas’s house with Jase right behind me. I couldn’t believe they really found him, that Jem was really alive. I wanted to laugh and cry at the same time. I wanted to see Jem with my own eyes, to hug him and tell him how much I’d missed him.
Ryan was sitting on the couch when I ran into the living room, a bloody towel in his hand. He was shirtless, his muscular chest and abs glistening with sweat and smeared with blood. His blue eyes, usually so bright and intense, looked tired and filled with worry.
As soon as he saw me, Ryan dropped the towel and strode over, his powerful legs covering the distance in just a few steps. He wrapped his strong arms around me, pulling me into a tight hug. I breathed in his scent; it always settled me.
“Thomas is with Jem in one of the upstairs guest rooms,” Ryan said, his deep voice rumbling in his chest. “There wasn’t enough space in the medical office.”
I pulled back, searching his face. “How is he?”
Ryan’s jaw clenched. “It’s not good, Mai. But he’s alive. ”
I let out a shaky breath, relief and fear warring inside me. “And Sam?”
“Things got a bit dicey with Sam for a moment,” Ryan admitted. “But he’s going to be fine. He’s out back with Wally and Amara. They’re helping him to Shift to speed up the healing process.”
“Amara? She’s helping?” Jase interrupted.
Ryan nodded, a small smile tugging at his lips. “Yeah, Thomas wasn’t kidding. She’s got some skills.”
“What about the rest of the team?” I asked.
Ryan’s expression was somber. “We lost two, and have a few injuries. Thomas is going to see them next.”
Before I could respond, Thomas’s voice called out from upstairs. “Mai? Ryan? Can you come up here, please?”
I didn’t hesitate. I rushed up the stairs, my heart pounding in my chest. Thomas met us at the door to the guest room. “Mai, I need you to take a moment before you go in there. Jem is stable for now, but he needs rest,” Thomas’s voice was low and gentle. “You need to be prepared for what you see in there. Jem’s been starved and beaten, and he’s lost his mate. Mentally and physically, he has a lot of healing to do. Right now, he’s too weak to Shift. He needs food and sleep before he’ll be strong enough for that.”
I felt tears prick at the corners of my eyes, my chest tightening with emotion.
I swallowed past the lump in my throat. “I understand.”
Ryan came to stand beside me. “Ready?”
I nodded, and together we followed Thomas into the room.
Jem was lying on the bed, his eyes closed and his chest rising and falling with each shallow breath. An IV drip was connected to his arm. His torso was bare, and I could see his ribs protruding beneath his skin. Bruises of various colors mottled his chest and stomach.
Even though Thomas had warned me, it was still a shock to see him like this. Gone was the vibrant, confident Alpha, so full of life and power, that I’d last seen. Instead, his body was wrecked, his face pale and gaunt. He looked to have aged ten years. I sat down on the chair beside the bed, and careful not to disturb the IV line, I reached out and took his hand in mine.
The moment my skin touched his, Jem’s eyes snapped open. For a split second, I saw confusion and fear in their depths before they hardened with fury. A vicious snarl tore from his throat as he lunged at me, his teeth bared.
I flinched back, just as Ryan hauled me out of the chair.
Jem’s attack was uncoordinated and clumsy, though. He tumbled off the bed, his body hitting the floor with a sickening thud.
Thomas rushed forward, dropping to his knees beside Jem. “Get her out of here!”
“No!” I didn’t want to go. I finally had my brother back; I wasn’t going to leave him now. I struggled against Ryan’s arm, but he held me firm and moved us towards the door.
I looked over Ryan’s shoulder to see Jem’s face contorting. He was trying to Shift, his features twisting and morphing into something halfway between man and wolf. But the change wouldn’t hold, and his body snapped back to human. He snarled again, trying to get to me, but Thomas held him back as Ryan closed the door.
“Put me down, Ryan!”
He ignored me, carrying me downstairs despite my protests. I wanted to go back, to help Jem .
“Mai, you can’t be in there right now,” Ryan said firmly, setting me down in the kitchen. “He’s not in his right mind; he could hurt you.”
I stopped fighting him. “I don’t understand,” I whispered. “Why would he react like that?”
“He’s been through a lot. It’s going to take time for him to heal.”
I looked up at him, a sudden thought occurring to me. “Do you think he’s on ripple? That could explain his behavior.”
Ryan shook his head. “I didn’t smell it on him. Whatever that was, I don’t think ripple is the issue.”
I frowned, remembering the way Jem’s face had contorted as he tried to Shift. “When I left the room, it looked like he was trying to partially Shift, but it wasn’t working. His features kept changing back and forth.”
“Only Alphas can use the energy from the Pack bonds to do that. Jem’s not the Alpha of the Three Rivers anymore; he no longer has access to that power. It’s going to take him time to get used to that.”
For fuck’s sake. Could it get any shittier for my brother?
I climbed onto Ryan’s lap, needing him to hold me. Without a word, he knew what I needed. His strong arms wrapped around me, and he held me that like, my head resting on his shoulder, until Thomas walked in ten minutes later.
“Jem’s settled and is sleeping for now,” he said, rubbing a hand over his face. “Mai, I need you to be out of the house before he wakes up.”
I stared at him, feeling a mix of confusion and hurt. “What? Why?”
Thomas sighed, pulling out a chair and sitting down heavily. “I’ve seen this once before. It’s a very rare set of circumstances. But essentially it comes down to the fact that Jem is too weak right now to keep his wolf under control. ”
I shook my head, not understanding. “But what’s wrong with his wolf? Jem’s wolf is not only one of the strongest I know but also one of the gentlest.”
I twisted round to face Ryan. “You remember that time when we were kids, when Jem’s wolf found that box of abandoned kittens in the woods? Most wolves would have either ignored them or eaten them. Instead, he carried them, one by one, in his jaws, over two miles to our apartment. It took him over three hours to get them all.”
“I remember,” Ryan grunted. “Those damn things followed him around whenever he Shifted to his wolf. What happened to them?”
“We couldn’t feed them, hell we could barely feed ourselves at that point. Jem found homes for them, but it took a long time for his wolf to forgive Jem for giving them up.”
“Mai, you have to understand,” Thomas said, putting his arms on the table. “Jem, the man, knows that you’re his sister. He loves you. He wants to protect you. He wants you to be happy. But right now, his wolf only sees the person who killed his mate.”
I felt like I had been punched in the gut. Why hadn’t I thought of that? I’d been so focused on getting Jem back, I hadn’t thought about how he would feel seeing me again.
“When Jem is stronger, he’ll be able to control his wolf,” Thomas continued gently. “But right now, he’s too weak. He’s locked in a battle with his wolf; trying to stop him from attacking you.”
It was like my world was crumbling around me. After all the pain we had gone through to get Jem back, and now his wolf wanted me dead.
Ryan slipped his hand round the back of my neck and pulled me closer to him. “We’ll figure this out, Mai. It won’t always be like this. ”
I wanted to believe him, but I wasn’t so sure. I knew myself and my own wolf, and no matter the circumstances, I would never be able to forgive someone who took Ryan from me.
A noise at the door had us all turning round. Esme was hovering at the entrance to the kitchen. She was clean at last, and her dirty blonde hair that looked so drab and lifeless before, now bounced a little as she looked at me with gentle, shy eyes.
“I can help,” she said quietly, her voice barely above a whisper. “I overheard. I can do good this time, cast a spell that will make the wolf sleep for two days. The man can heal and get strong before he has to face his wolf again.”
I stared at her, thinking. The idea of using magic on Jem made me uncomfortable, but if it could help him...
Thomas nodded thoughtfully. “I’ve seen it done before. Down south where witches can still practice. It’s a safe and effective way to give Jem the time he needs to recover.”
I glanced at Ryan, seeking his opinion. He met my gaze and shrugged; it was up to me. Jem was my brother.
“Thomas, do you think Jem is able to make this decision if you asked him?”
“No, he’s not in any state to understand this.”
I looked at Esme. Did I trust her? She could do anything to my brother without us knowing. I’d be putting my brother’s life in her hands.
Trust the pup, my wolf urged me.
You sure?
My wolf didn’t reply. She’d already said what she thought.
“Okay, do it. ”
A smile lit up Esme’s face. “Yes, I will do good this time.”
Thomas stood up. “I’ll be there the whole time, Mai. I’ll keep a close eye on her.”
I watched them go, my heart heavy with worry and hope.