Chapter 12
Yaseema, you are too young to understand this now, but I needed you to know the reason.
You should know why I won’t be there to see you press your toes into the dirt of the mango orchard anymore, or hear your sweet voice as I teach you our songs.
Why I won’t be able to hold you to my chest, wrap you in my dupatta, and sing in your ear as you fall asleep.
I’m going across the River, Yaseema. And I’m going to save us all.
—Excerpt from a letter from Mahira Nazir to Yaseema Nazir
Yaseema
The current of the River seemed to pick up as soon as I had made it through the magical wall.
I kicked hard through the water until I was clawing at the bank, ripping at the weeds to give myself leverage.
But the current was stronger, pulling me farther along the River, tugging me under the rushing water.
I cried out, and water filled my mouth, causing me to choke and sputter as I tried to regain my footing.
I managed to grab onto a broken tree branch and clung to it helplessly, desperately trying to catch my breath until warm fingers pressed into my shoulders, stealing it from me once more. I jerked in surprise, my gaze darting up.
An old woman reached down from the riverbank, a shawl pulled over her white hair, which spilled out in thick curls the color of moonlight.
She held out her hand to me, her eyes filled with meaning, and I didn’t see any claws or fangs or blood dripping from her mouth like my mother’s stories had warned me about, so I grabbed her hand and she helped haul me out of the River.
I dragged myself up the rest of the way, my satchel soaking wet, my canvas skirt sticking to my legs in heavy folds.
My spectacles were speckled with water and I removed them, shaking off the lenses so I could at least see properly.
Once I was safely on solid ground, I flipped open the flap on my satchel, scrambling through it to search for my mother’s journal to examine the damage.
It was miraculously unharmed, protected by the wax paper I’d wrapped it in for safekeeping.
I released a sigh of relief and lay back on the grass, looking up at the trees, realizing with a start that the sky looked different.
The sun was lower, as if it were later in the day, that ever changing light was somewhere between sunset and evening.
It was as if I had landed on the other side of the world instead of the other side of a mile-wide river.
Soft, murmured words pulled me from the grass.
The old woman who had helped me was speaking and gesturing across the River.
But her words were difficult to follow. It was not that she spoke another language, but the sounds she strung together weren’t any language at all.
No discernible words or meanings, just garbled whispers.
Her hair was white and long, flowing past her shoulders in unkempt wildness.
Her face was smudged with dirt and something red that looked like blood, her eyes hollow and dark.
She wore a torn, faded frock, the pattern old and undiscernible, and as my gaze dipped to her feet I jerked back in shock.
They were twisted and backward.
I stared for what felt like an eternity. Her feet were somehow pointed behind her, distorted like a tree branch forced to bend the other direction.
There were tales of the backward-footed fae, but I struggled to remember what they were or if my mother had made any mention of them in her journal. I pushed myself to my feet trying to make sense of the words the old woman kept repeating, thse unintelligible sounds that I didn’t recognize.
“I don’t understand,” I whispered back, shaking my head and trying to follow her gestures.
But the low roar of an unknown beast cut through what she was trying to communicate, and I turned, my heart pounding so loud it competed with the rush of water beside me.
The River was surrounded by forest, and not the dilapidated one in Astola, but lush trees that were green and vibrant.
I didn’t see a beast or creature of any kind.
Which was all the more terrifying. Whatever had roared was waiting in those thick trees. Fear leapt to my throat as my eyes searched the trees.
Another roar sounded, this time closer.
“What was that?” I asked the woman. She wrapped her arms around my shoulders and clung to me, ignoring the violent sound of an unknown beast that echoed around us. She shook me, as if she were trying to convey something to me as she kept looking over at the River.
She must’ve never seen anyone cross it before.
I certainly hadn’t.
Another roar and low growl and I wrenched away from the old woman, scanning the edge of the water. There, at the foot of the trees, I saw something that made my skin go even colder than swimming across the River.
A beast had appeared out of the woods. It looked like a wolf, except it was the size of a horse, with a fierce black mane and teeth larger than my hands.
White foam dripped from its mouth, and its narrowed eyes were a violent red.
It stared at me, stalking along the edge of the River, coming closer with every step.
A scream trapped itself in my chest.
Unlike the kind old woman who had helped me, this beast was the very depiction of what human folklore had warned us about the fae.
They’ll suck your flesh from your bones. They’ll curse you to forget all your loved ones.
The fae will tear you apart and laugh while you scream.
They delight in torturing humans and feeding them to their monsters.
The fae will enslave you, and you’ll never be able to die as long as you are in their thrall. But you’ll be theirs forever.
“We have to go,” I said with a panicked voice. The creature was walking steadily closer. I gestured to a path in the trees. “We can’t just stand here!”
The woman shook her head vehemently and tried to grab me again, but I stepped back. I wasn’t going to let that thing devour me. But I didn’t want this old woman to be attacked either.
“Come with me,” I said to the woman, while never taking my eyes from the beast slowly creeping toward us.
But she shook her head and pointed again at the River. Perhaps she couldn’t run? My eyes flickered back down to her backward-facing feet again.
“I’m sorry,” I said, “I can’t stay here.”
Nor could I leave the first person to help me in this world at the mercy of a wolf the size of a house. If the woman couldn’t, or wouldn’t join me, I would try to lead the beast away from her if I could. It was the least I could do after she’d pulled me from the River.
I squeezed my eyes shut, thinking of my mother, who had done this journey herself.
Of Nani telling me that the choice I made was the right one.
Of Safiyya shooting her rifle at an onslaught of soldiers, urging me to leave.
Did they manage to escape? Were they gunned down by the Citadel soldiers and labeled rebels?
Safiyya’s earlier words rang in my brain.
Her destiny is to follow her mother across the River, even though she never came back for her own daughter.
And then my mother’s words, from her letters and poems and journals—they flooded back to me too.
I’m going to cross the river, Yaseema. And I’m going to save us all.
I clutched the journal, staring down at her golden bangles adorning my arm.
Something was happening to the human world, something my mother tried to fix. Now it was up to me to be the one to mend it.
It was up to me to finish what she began.
I will always be beside you. My nani’s words buoyed me.
I locked eyes with the wolf, then picked up a stick and threw it. The creature snapped it in midair and lunged forward.
But I was ready.
I wasn’t a fighter, but I’d had enough practice dodging traps in ancient vaults to hopefully outsmart this creature.
I tore off into the woods, hoping to lure it away from the old woman.
I ran through lush forests and bountiful trees, the beast at my legs, its growl echoing through the forest, of the smell of my panic and fear drowned out by the fresh scent of the eucalyptus trees surrounding me.
Why hadn’t I brought a weapon with me? Even one of the rifles from the Citadel soldiers might’ve been helpful. They were heavy, but at least it would’ve been something.
I threaded through the jungle, the eucalyptus trees fading into babuls as the forest became denser. Something hit my head, and I startled, but it was just a mango hanging low from a branch.
Trees.
I was surrounded by trees. Running was not something I was skilled at, but searching after lost fae relics in the moonlight in Astola had made me a particularly good climber.
I grabbed at the branch, swinging myself up on it and climbing as fast as I could until I reached the top. The giant wolf howled below me, and jumped at the tree, but I was thankfully just out of its reach.
An outcropping of rock touched the top of the highest branch, and I reached for it, swinging myself over the top of the tree to the ledge of the boulder.
My arms felt strong as I hoisted myself onto the boulder and slid my body down the flat face of it.
I peeked over the top, looking down at the wolf to see if it had noticed me climb away.
It still waited at the bottom of the tree.
If I was lucky, I could climb down the other side of the rock and make a run for it before it even knew I had left the tree.
My feet found a steady foothold as I made my way down the boulder carefully, listening as the beast grunted and growled, sniffing the air and trying to catch my scent.
I had reached the bottom of the giant rock, but my feet didn’t want to jump to the ground.
My legs were frozen, my heart pounding so loud in my chest it drowned every other noise out.
Finally, I slid down to the ground, my feet landing softly in the spongy forest moss.
An enormous roar seemed to shake the entire forest and I pressed my hands to my mouth, to stifle a scream.
My legs shook, but I began to slowly walk backward, not wanting to turn my back on the wolf if it came around the other side of the rock.
With each step a feeling of hopelessness grew in my gut.
Every myth and story I had heard about the land of the fae was true—every beast and monster from my nightmares had come from here.
This was not a nice place.
It wasn’t a place where I survive by myself, let alone search for a relic to help Astola.
I was hunted from the moment I stepped foot on the ground here. I didn’t know how to fight and my magic wasn’t for self-defense.
Panic rose in my chest as I continued to spiral—I was going to die here.
Still, I continued to back away, my footsteps soft as I watched the gap in the trees to make sure the beast didn’t follow.
If I was going to die, I would at least run as fast as I could away from that death.
I was so focused on the wolf that when my back hit a warm, solid body behind me, I opened my mouth to scream the shock flooding through me, until a firm hand reached up and clapped itself over my mouth.