Chapter 2
BEN
So this is the famous Sarah?
She was hot.
Sarah had deep brown eyes, smooth black hair that skimmed her shoulders, medium brown skin, and full lips, and those fitted jeans and white T-shirt she was wearing perfectly accentuated her gorgeous curves.
Theo and Jess had spoken about Sarah a lot, so I’d been looking forward to meeting her. But judging by the way she was shooting daggers at me right now, the only way Sarah wanted to see me was buried in a ditch after I’d been mauled to death by a pack of hungry lions.
Lesson learned.
Next time I was trying to console a mate whose girlfriend had just dumped him because he wasn’t, as she’d put it, ‘book boyfriend material’, I’d avoid doing it on a train where a passionate romance reader was apparently documenting my every word.
I’d barely caught the train in time and I swear I’d only seen a few pensioners in the carriage when I’d boarded.
I hadn’t even realised Sarah was there. And even if I had, what were the chances of my conversation being heard by a woman who not only loved romance novels but would be working in the same building as me?
Probably one in a million.
Believe me, if I’d seen a woman who looked like that sitting there, I would’ve called Hugh back later. I’d already spent last night at his place in London listening to him bitch about his ex, so he would’ve understood.
Now I’d just made my life difficult.
I took off my sunglasses, hoping that if I fluttered the long lashes that the ladies always told me they loved, Sarah might forgive me, but if anything, she looked even angrier.
Right now, she was glaring at me like I’d just cracked the spine of her favourite novel and dog-eared the pages, which Jess had recently told me that according to Readers’ Law was a criminal offence. Who knew?
Speaking of Jess, she didn’t look happy either. She was scowling at me with her arms folded, and Theo’s face was crumpled with confusion.
Yep. This wasn’t looking good.
‘I can’t believe that you’re Ben!’ Sarah shouted. ‘You’re a fraud! We can’t have people like you here polluting the library with your narrow-minded views. Jess, Theo, back me up!’
‘Is this true?’ Theo barked. ‘Were you talking shit about romance novels?’
‘Gimme a break, guys.’ I flashed a weak smile. ‘It was just a misunderstanding.’
‘Answer the question!’ Jess’s nostrils flared.
‘Not shit exactly…’ I said cautiously, feeling like I was on trial and giving the wrong answer would result in them stringing me up and chopping off my balls.
‘Er, hello?’ Sarah interrupted. ‘Pretty sure you called it bullshit.’
Ah, yes. I’d forgotten about that…
‘Perhaps my choice of words was a little harsh…’ I held my hands up. ‘But I was just saying out loud what a lot of people already think.’
‘Which is?’ Sarah shot me another death stare.
‘That romance novels are…’ I paused, weighing up my response. ‘Predictable.’
The gasps were audible.
On reflection, being less than complimentary about an entire genre, especially given the fact that we were having this conversation in a library that was dedicated to romance, wasn’t my smartest move, but everyone was acting like I’d just committed murder.
‘See!’ Sarah said.
‘You did not just say that!’ Jess looked horrified.
It was official. The chances of me leaving this room alive with my genitals intact were zero.
‘Honestly?’ I said, deciding it’d be better to tell the truth and accept the consequences. ‘Kind of…’ The whole room fell so silent that if I dropped a feather, it’d land with thump. ‘The couple always live happily ever after at the end.’
‘But that’s the point!’ Sarah snapped. ‘It’s comforting. Life’s depressing, so readers need the reassurance of knowing that everything’s going to work out.’
‘But that’s exactly why I said it’s unrealistic!’ I countered. ‘That doesn’t happen in real life.’
‘Fuck real life!’ Sarah spat back. ‘War, murder, death, disease, bills, tax, cheating exes, shitty families… we already have enough of the dumpster fire called reality to deal with. We read for escapism. So we can get away from all that for a few hours. And even if we know what will happen in the end, it’s about the journey.
All of the exciting things that happen on the way to the couple finding love. ’
‘Please!’ I scoffed as I rolled my eyes.
‘If the “journey” isn’t predictable, then why does every first kiss get interrupted by a phone call?
And why do all the men look the same? Only two per cent of the global population have green eyes, but in the romance novels I’ve read, ninety-nine per cent of the heroes have them!
And for the love of God, why do they always have an argument towards the end of the book, that could be solved with a two-minute conversation? ’
‘Because…’ Sarah stuttered and I flashed a mischievous smile, knowing she wouldn’t be able to answer because she knew that what I’d said was true.
‘You’re exaggerating. That doesn’t happen in all romance novels, just…
anyway, I’m not even going to waste my breath trying to educate you. You’re a dick!’
One point to me.
‘Now, now, you two,’ Theo jumped in. ‘Let’s just try and talk this through. Ben, we’re all entitled to our own opinions, but yucking someone else’s yum is not okay. And this is a romance library, so it should go without saying that we should all show the genre the respect it deserves.’
‘Exactly!’ Sarah snapped back. ‘Romance should be celebrated, not denigrated.’
‘Yes!’ Jess agreed.
Jesus.
They were blowing this way out of proportion.
I was about to tell Sarah and Jess that they needed to chill the fuck out, but I’d learnt a long time ago that telling a woman to calm down was the fastest way to get kicked in the balls.
And given how much I’d clearly pissed them off already, now was probably a good time to keep my mouth shut if I wanted to reach my thirty-first birthday.
‘So, Jess, Theo, what should his punishment be?’ Sarah spat.
‘Shall we tie him to a pole and get our members to throw romance novels at him? If we pick some thick romantasy ones, they’ll definitely land with a thud.
’ A satisfied grin spread across her face.
‘Then again, he doesn’t deserve to have our gorgeous books hurled at him.
Not even if they accidentally hit him in the nuts. ’
‘Harsh!’ I winced.
‘Now you know what he really thinks about romance, surely you’re not going to allow him to work here?’ Sarah put her hands on her hips.
‘Seriously?’ I scoffed. Now she was taking this way too far.
‘Jess, can I talk to you for a second, please?’ Theo said.
‘Good idea,’ Jess replied and they both left the room.
‘You should pack your bags.’ Sarah glared. ‘There’s no way you’ll be staying here after what you just said.’
‘We’ll see.’ I smiled.
Yes, I knew Jess and Theo weren’t happy with what I’d said, but I was confident that they knew me well enough to realise that in the grand scheme of things, I’d be an asset to their operations here.
When I was living in LA, I hadn’t seen myself coming back to the UK to work at a romance library. But then something really shitty had happened and I knew I needed to leave town, fast. And when Theo said he needed my help, that sealed the deal. The timing was perfect.
My brother had always had my back, so if spending a few months in this tiny town, surrounded by romance evangelists, was what he wanted me to do, then I wasn’t going to let Sarah’s little give Ben the boot campaign stop me.
Sarah glowered at me, whilst I grinned back at her, which only seemed to make her angrier. But I didn’t mind. She still looked cute. Plus, it gave me an excuse to look at her properly.
I liked her eyes. They were dark and fiery. Probably because there were angry flames shooting from her pupils right now.
And all that pouting was perfect for showing off her beautiful full lips.
Although I guessed that she probably straightened her hair, it was a little tousled at the back, probably from leaning against the train headrest, which I loved. Made me think of how it might look if she woke up in my bed…
And don’t even get me started on her body. I’d only glimpsed it briefly, but I was already a fan.
‘What’s up, sweetheart?’ I smiled at her as she continued to scowl. ‘I know you think I’m irresistible, but honestly, all of this staring is getting embarrassing. Tone it down a tad.’
Sarah’s eyes popped with shock.
‘In your dreams!’ She laughed. ‘I thought you were a dick on the train, but now I don’t even have the words to describe what a knob you are!’
‘First you can’t take your eyes off me and now you’re talking about my knob. Is there an HR department here? I need to talk to someone about your inappropriate comments in the workplace.’ I smirked.
‘You little prick!’
‘There she goes again. Fixating on my cock.’ I shook my head whilst trying to stifle a laugh.
‘Honestly, Sarah, we’ve only just met. Show some self-control, woman.
This obsession isn’t healthy. Oh, and by the way, nothing about my prick is little…
’ I grinned and I swear Sarah was so angry if she’d opened her mouth to speak, fire would’ve shot out.
‘So!’ Jess said as she burst back into the room. ‘Theo and I have spoken.’
‘Yes,’ Theo added. ‘And although we’re horrified by Ben’s words and don’t support his views, we’ve decided that we’re not going to kick him out.’
‘Thank you.’ I gave Sarah a smug smile.
‘What the hell?’ Sarah shouted. ‘Jess? Look, I know I’m a newbie and you and Theo make the rules, but can’t you both see that it’s dangerous to have a non-believer like him working here?
It’s like recruiting a butcher to work for an animal rights charity or asking an atheist to lead the Sunday service at St Paul’s Cathedral! ’
A non-believer?
Jesus. Now the woman was making this place sound like a cult.
‘I hear you,’ Jess said softly. ‘I know his shitty comments make him look like an idiot, but lucky for Ben, Theo and I know that he’s a good guy.’
‘Cheers, sis,’ I said.
‘With the right rehabilitation programme, we believe Ben can be saved,’ Jess added.
‘For crying out loud!’ I rolled my eyes. ‘You’re making it sound like I have a serious addiction. Next you’ll be staging an intervention!’
Actually, I shouldn’t joke about that. I wouldn’t put anything past them at this point.
Jess ignored my comment and continued. ‘As I was saying, luckily, we still feel like there’s hope for Ben. That’s why we’ve decided that if he wants to stay, he’ll need to commit to reading one romance novel a week, to be chosen by you.’
‘What?’ I gasped.
Sarah’s scowl tipped up into a satisfied smile.
‘I like the sound of this!’ Her eat-shit grin intensified.
‘And we’ve also decided,’ Jess added, ‘that he’ll work with you on the social media and you’ll work with him on two new development projects.’
‘What?’ Sarah and I barked in unison, both of our faces falling.
‘You’re having a laugh!’ Sarah shook her head with disbelief. ‘Please tell me you’re joking?’
‘Nope,’ Jess replied. ‘I’m deadly serious. Let’s all have a fresh start, shall we? Sarah, Ben, welcome to your exciting new roles at the Romance Library!’