5. Jude
JUDE
Halo House’s events were infamous, and Phoenix had gone all out on Kim’s engagement party.
Her Daddy, Lucas, had offered to take care of the cost related to the evening, but Phoenix had refused.
Instead, all the members of Halo House had teamed up to throw a wonderful party, both celebrating Kim as a success story of the house and the new chapter in her life.
Standing in the corner of the room, a plate of untouched appetizers in my hand, I smiled at my former little, who could barely tear herself away from her fiancé’s side.
She might not have understood why I’d kept our relationship platonic while I’d been her Daddy, but seeing how happy she was, I knew I’d done the right thing.
Otherwise, she would have held on to her infatuation, I would have ended up hurting her, and she might not have given her fiancé a chance, which would have been a damn shame.
The real estate mogul not only doted on her but could also provide the kind of support and stability she needed. In fact, when Kim had broken the news of her engagement to me, she’d been in tears because he’d bought a house in her name, knowing how much she feared not having a home.
I dragged my eyes away from the happy couple and scanned over the groups of people in the ballroom.
Except for Tony, all the regular angels of Halo House were present.
There was one face I’d expected to see—Soren, the boy who’d shown up last night—but I had yet to get a glimpse of him even though I’d been at the party for over half an hour, which was fifteen minutes longer than I’d originally planned to stick around.
Maybe he left this morning.
The thought shouldn’t have left me feeling as disappointed as it did, but there was something different about him. I didn’t necessarily want to be his Daddy, but I would have liked to learn his story.
“Jude, there you are!” Phoenix came up to me, smiling as usual. He had such a warm personality that your face automatically rearranged itself into pleasantness just for him.
“Hey, great party,” I said. “And am I seeing new sponsors?”
“Yes, aren’t we the lucky ones? And Lucas has indicated an interest in acquiring a new place for an additional Halo House.”
Kim was so lucky to have him. I’d done my own research on him when they’d started seeing each other and didn’t recall any red flags.
“That’s exciting. I know how important Halo House is to you.”
“It is, but one of the reasons we’ve done so well in making meaningful changes to the lives of our angels is that we are small enough to manage everyone properly. I’d have to give it some thought if expanding will compromise the effort.”
“I get it.” I glanced over his shoulder when I caught a glimpse of dark brown skin, but it was only Dean. “How’s it going finding care for Dean?”
“Not so well. I know he seems like one of the most social of all our guests and can charm everyone, but he lacks focus. His ADHD has improved since Doctor Vale got him the help he needs with medication.”
Aaron Vale’s brother was a doctor who worked closely with Phoenix and Halo House to provide care to the angels since they usually didn’t have health insurance.
“He’s not been here for long,” I said. “Give it time. I know you’ll figure something out.”
“Fingers crossed.”
A passing server offered us champagne, but I shook my head and gave him the plate of appetizers.
“Tony decided not to attend?” I asked carefully.
“Yes. He was feeling a bit blue today after seeing his Daddy. I suspect he’ll be leaving us soon.”
“But that’s great, right?”
“Yes, but I’ll miss him. He’s been a fixture at Halo House for so long. I’m proud of him and how far he’s come.”
“So is he upstairs alone now? Want me to check on him?”
“He’ll be fine. He’s probably hanging out with Soren, who decided not to come as well. You remember Soren from last night? He’s fit in so well with the others already.”
I scratched the back of my head as if I was just now thinking about him. “You mean the guy Vale brought over last night?”
“Yes.” Phoenix took a sip of his drink, but I didn’t miss the furrow of his brows.
“What’s wrong? Anything I can do to help?”
“He needs a Daddy badly,” he replied. “But I’m not sure he’ll accept one. He was engaged to one who hurt him, though he wouldn’t say how. I suspect his hurt is a lot more emotional than anything else.”
I could have told him that from the defeated look in the boy’s eyes last night.
“My biggest worry is that he doesn’t know how to do anything.”
I went still, my heart pounding in my ears at the information Phoenix relayed to me. Soren didn’t know how to work a dishwasher, a washing machine, or the coffee pot. He’d barely gotten the microwave to work.
Phoenix believed in the privacy of the angels until they were ready to share with others.
There was only one reason he was telling me all this, and I wasn’t sure how to feel about it.
I’d promised myself that I’d take the year off from being a Daddy before accepting another sub, but Phoenix’s words also woke something up inside of me—the need to take a helpless boy and guide him into self-confidence and self-sufficiency.
That was my specialty at Halo, and everyone knew it.
“What do you think, Jude?” Phoenix asked. “He’s literally helpless and will need a lot of guidance. I know you wanted to take a break, but I think Soren needs you.”
I swallowed the instant yes that sprang to my lips.
I’d never had an issue saying no before if I wasn’t in the frame of mind to accept a sub, and Phoenix had always respected that.
What was it about this particular boy that called to me and made me want to say yes so fast?
I didn’t even know anything about him, just got a hint of sadness from him.
“I don’t know. You said he might not be interested in a Daddy.”
“But it’s also just his first day here. I’m sure once he settles in a bit, he’ll understand why caregivers are at the heart of almost every success story here at Halo House. Tomorrow I’ll have him meet with Kim so he’ll know how great you’d be for him.”
I was just about to maintain my doubt when Vale showed up next to Phoenix out of thin air. He was in plain clothes and didn’t look half bad. In fact, he was quite a handsome man.
“Jude.” He nodded at me, then his full attention was on Phoenix, so I didn’t bother answering. “Is everything okay? Why haven’t I seen Soren?”
My back straightened, and I tried not to scowl at his interest in someone I wanted more than I cared to admit. “He decided not to attend,” Phoenix said. “He’s probably in his room if you want to speak with him.”
“It’s fine. I saw him earlier. He’s not my boy, so I can’t have him get too attached to me.”
Phoenix cocked his head to the side. “Would you like him to be? It would make sense, given he is already so comfortable with you.”
“Really, Phoenix?” Vale asked. “I’ve never taken any of them as a boy before. Plus, it would be an ethical conflict, since I’m the officer handling his case.”
“Well, you can give his case to another officer, can’t you?”
I’d had enough.
“No need to go through all that trouble,” I said. “I don’t mind being his caregiver, Phoenix.”
Phoenix’s eyes widened, and he smiled brightly, clapping his hands. “Oh, Jude, you’ll do it? That makes me so relieved. You’ll take great care of him, and I’m already excited at the prospect of how much he will grow under your care. You’re truly one of the best Daddies in the program.”
Phoenix embraced me in a warm hug and placed a kiss on my cheek. Over his shoulder, I caught Vale’s scowl and couldn’t help teasing him with a wink. He was so far gone for Phoenix, and yet he wouldn’t speak up to claim what he wanted. How many years could a man pine over someone he loved?
“I’m off this weekend if you want to organize an official first meeting between us,” I said.
Protocol at Halo House dictated that, no matter how good a fit Phoenix thought I was, I had to meet the sub, and we would evaluate whether it was a good fit for both of us. If there was hesitancy on the part of either of us, then the dynamic wouldn’t work.
“That sounds perfect.” Phoenix stepped back, right up against Vale’s chest, and stumbled. “Oops.”
Vale caught him with an arm around Phoenix’s waist. “It’s okay. I’ve got you.”
Phoenix looked up at Vale, his lips parting, but no sound came out. They stared at each other like they were the only ones in the room, a current crackling between them. It’d been that way for as long as I could remember—at least five years.
“Y’all should just kiss already,” I muttered loud enough for them to hear as I walked away. “Phoenix, I’ll keep in touch with you. I’ll give Kim my regards, then be on my way.”
After all, my task for the evening was done.
As I approached Kim, she spotted me and her eyes lit up. “Daddy!” she squealed, throwing herself at me. I hugged her and patted her back the way I knew she loved.
“There, there. Be a good girl and stop calling me that with your actual Daddy around. Don’t want him to beat me up, do you?”
Lucas laughed as we exchanged a one-armed hug, slapping my back harder than necessary.
“You get away with it this once, Jude, because I know how much you mean to my little girl. If not for you, we wouldn’t have found each other.”
“Yeah, well, it’s my job to make them better for a better man.”
“Better?” Lucas stroked the side of Kim’s face. “This one’s a troublemaker.”
“Stop by sometime, and I’ll give you some pointers on how to manage her well.”
“Oh, Daddy, you know you love me being a brat.”
“I do, sweetheart.”
Lucas kissed his fiancée briefly, and I couldn’t have been happier for them. Being in their orbit actually made me feel the rare moment of envy over a couple who were perfect together. I’d thought I had that once.
“Listen, I just wanted to say congrats again,” I said. “You two really make a beautiful couple.”
“Thanks, man,” Lucas said.
“And of course you’ll walk me down the aisle and give me away?” Kim asked.
“Really?” I was stunned that she would want me to participate in her wedding and in such an important capacity.
“Of course. I can’t think of anyone more suitable for the job. You were more of a father to me than my own ever was.”
Choked up, I nodded. “Of course. I’d love to give you away.” Eyes misting, I wagged a finger at Lucas. “You take real good care of her or I’m gonna have to hunt you down.”
Kim giggled. “I think you’re supposed to say that on the wedding day.”
I chuckled. “I’ll say it again then, too. I’ll be heading out now. You two take care.”
It took me a bit longer to leave, as I kept getting stopped on the way to the door. Kim wasn’t the only one in that room I’d mentored. The event was chock-full of past Halo House angels, and most of them had brought their partners.
The foyer had more people, so I made a break for it along the hall leading to the conservatory. As the person Phoenix called whenever something needed fixing at Halo House, I knew the floor plan like the back of my hand.
The conservatory had always been one of my favorite spots in Halo House.
It was quiet, tucked to the side of the house, with glass walls and a ceiling that let the moonlight spill over rows of leafy plants and colorful flowers.
The air smelled faintly of soil and greenery, and the music from the party was little more than a muffled hum.
I slipped inside, closing the door behind me, only to stop in my tracks.
Soren. My heart skipped a beat. He stood near one of the planters, his hand resting against the floor pot.
His shoulders slumped beneath a cream cashmere sweater as he stared out through the glass.
Surrounded by so much life and vibrancy, he looked like a wilted flower.
One I wanted to replant, water, prune, and nurse back to full color.
He turned his head, and our eyes clashed. His beautiful lips were turned down, and his eyes shone with unshed tears under the moonlight. Everything inside of me squeezed tight, even my lungs, making it difficult for me to breathe.
As I watched, a tear slipped down his cheek, and I did everything wrong. With long strides, I breached the distance between us and gathered him into my arms, pressing his face to my chest.
“Shh. It’s going to be alright.”
I knew I was wrong for initiating contact. Many of Halo’s residents had been abused and might not like to be touched. Even with my arms around him, I prepared myself for his rejection, but after a few seconds, a sob tore from him, and his arms went around me, clutching me tightly.