70. Too Much To Carry #3
A child shouldn't have to learn fear before learning confidence. But life hadn't given her that choice.
"She'll be okay," I said quietly.
Vedika smiled faintly.
"I know."
I hoped she was right. Because this family had already suffered enough. And right now, I had two more broken hearts waiting for me upstairs.
I came directly to Dhrithi's room. The door was thankfully unlocked. I peeked inside and froze for a second.
The entire room was a mess.Books were scattered across the floor. Clothes were folded into uneven piles. A large suitcase lay open on the bed, already half-filled with clothes and personal belongings.
Another suitcase sat near the bookshelf.
And Dhrithi was crouched beside it, carefully taking out her books and placing them inside one by one.
I pushed the door open and stepped inside.
The sound of my footsteps made her turn around.
God. She looked terrible.
The sparkle that usually lived in her eyes was gone. Dark circles sat beneath them, her cheeks looked hollow, and she seemed smaller somehow.
Like the last few days had taken years out of her.
"Bhaiya..." she whispered before standing so quickly that she almost stumbled.
I looked at the suitcases. "Why are these bags packed?"
My voice came out calmer than I felt. "Where are you going?"
Immediately, she took a step back. The back of her legs hit the bookshelf. Her eyes dropped to the floor. Her fingers tightened around the hem of her shorts.
"Bhaiya..." Her voice cracked. "I-I'm sorry."
The words shattered halfway through. A tear slipped from her eye, then another.
"I hurt you."
My heart sank.
"I..." Her lips trembled violently. "I am going away from here."
Yeah, as if leaving was the solution.
Without another word, I dropped my laptop bag onto the couch and walked straight towards her. Before she could move away, I pulled her into my arms.
"Shut up." My voice came out rough. "You're not going anywhere."
The moment my arms wrapped around her, she broke. Completely.
A sob escaped her as she buried her face in my chest.
"Bhaiya..." Her hands clutched my shirt desperately. "I'm sorry."
Her shoulders shook violently. "I hurt you." Another sob.
"I-I am so bad, but I swear... I didn't know he...."
"Dhrithi-"
"Please don't avoid me, Bhaiya." The words came out broken. Barely understandable."Please."
My heart felt like someone was crushing it with their bare hands. "Please don't hate me, Bhaiya. I love you a lot."
I immediately tightened my arms around her. "I don't."
She cried harder. "I'm sorry. Please forgive me."
"Dhrithi."
"I'm sorry. Please...."
"Dhrithi baby listen..."
"I am so-"
"DHRITHI!" I hardened my voice this time to pull her out of the haze she was going into.
She froze. Only her quiet sobs remained. I cupped the back of her head. "Stop." My throat tightened. "Just stop, baby."
Her body trembled against mine. Her hands were freezing cold. "I am not angry. I was just hurt."
A lie.
I was angry. Furious. Just not at her. At myself because I failed to protect her. I was not enough for her.
"Calm down." I rubbed her back slowly. "Everything is alright."
"No..." she cried. "It's not."
"It is." I pressed.
"You hate me." She looked up at me with hopeful eyes. "You don't love me anymore."
I closed my eyes. God. How alone had she been feeling these last few days?
"I don't hate you." My voice softened. "I could never hate my baby."
A fresh wave of tears escaped her.
"You hear me?"
She nodded weakly against my chest.
"You are precious to me."
A broken laugh escaped her between tears.
Finally something other than pain.
I kissed the top of her head.
"Thank you..." she whispered. "And I'm sorry."
"Dhrithi-"
"No, let me say it." She pulled back a little.
Her eyes were swollen from crying, her cheeks wet with tears.
"I always disappoint you." The guilt in her voice was unbearable.
"I always create problems. I always make mistakes. But now..."
She quickly wiped her face. "Now I'll listen to you. I'll do everything you say."
A small smile tugged at my lips despite everything. "Everything?"
She nodded again.
"Everything. I promise."
I stared at her for a moment before sighing.
We talked for a few more minutes before I made her lie down on the bed. She closed her eyes, but I knew sleep was nowhere near her.
My gaze fell on her arms and my chest tightened.
There were faint scratch marks around her wrists. A few nail marks on her forearms. The skin around her fingers looked raw, as if she had been picking at it for days without realizing. Even near her neck, there were light red marks.
I looked away and rubbed a hand over my face.
Vedika was right. Dhrithika was falling back into depression.
After our parents' death, Dhrithika's condition had become so bad that even today I don't like remembering those days.
But some memories never leave you. No matter how hard you try.
The image of finding her lyingin a bathtub filled with water. The cuts on her wrist.