6. Charlie
6
P epper flips through the brochures I brought from the library, which is a heck of a lot less distracting than browsing the internet.
Plus, I’m a paper girl, I prefer cutouts over screenshots.
“Oh, how about these?” I point to the flowers.
She cringes. “Ugh, calla lilies? They’re so…plain. I was thinking white roses.”
“Hmm…those will be expensive.”
Pepper doesn’t say anything and I wince. Of course. Her fiancé can afford it.
“White roses it is.” I flip back to them and tear the page.
“Mmm…put that in the maybe pile.”
“The maybe pile is getting awfully large. You’ll need to make a decision soon,” I warn.
Pepper throws her head back against the sofa cushions. “Can we take a break?”
“If you take any more breaks, you’ll be moving backward.”
She watches me thoughtfully. “Can we talk more about your bucket list?”
I roll my eyes. The other day, I had a little too much wine and started listing off things I thought I would have done by now, or at least before I turn twenty-five. “It’s not a list…I just said before I leave town, I want to skinny dip in my favorite lake. It’s not ice cold this time of year and I think it’ll be fun.”
“Well, I know I said I’ll do it with you but…if I can’t see what’s in the water, I don’t go in it.”
“College kids do it all the time. No one’s died.”
“Yet,” she mutters. “And?”
“And a super small tattoo.”
“Aaannd?” she urges and I have no clue what she’s getting at.
“That’s it.”
“Oh, come on, Charlie. You need to have sex. Pop your cherry. Knock those purple boots. You’re killing me over here.”
“How is my being a virgin hurting you?”
“Because it's hard to have sexy talk time with your bestie when she hasn't experienced it yet. And I want that for you because it can be mind-blowing.”
I cock my head. “The talk?”
“No, the sex. Oh my god, this is going to be harder than I thought.”
“Look, you can feel free to talk…I’ll get it plenty. I wasn’t born yesterday.”
She deadpans me. “That tiny purple toy of yours isn’t even close to the real thing.”
“It’s not tiny. It’s perfect for me.”
“Let me find you a perfect Charlie-candidate. And don’t worry, not someone from town. There’s this guy on Chase’s hockey team, Landon… something.”
“Landon Humphrey?” I practically shout. “He’s way out of my league.”
Her eyes flare and she growls. “No one’s out of your league.”
I give her a seductive smile. “Aww…will you go out with me?”
“Oh please, honey, I’m out of your league.” She winks.
“Can we get back to these?” I hold up the magazines we have left to rip through.
“No. I want you to say it. Tell me you haven’t thought of it.”
“Okay, yes. Obviously. But I don’t want complicated . I want to do it and never think of it again.”
She laughs. “Then Landon is soo your guy.”
“Oh great. Now, I really want to hop on that train.” I roll my eyes.
Pepper nods. “And I bet it’s a long one. Choo choo.”
I smack her playfully with a magazine.
“Okay, no more sex jokes. You should totally meet him though. Chase is having some of the team over next week for game night. I invited a few of the Ice Queens too. You have to come.”
“Meet Landon Humphrey? No.” I shake my head. I’d barely be able to talk to the guy much less have casual sex with him.
“It’ll be fine. He’s super chill.”
I nod noncommittedly. “Okay, I’ll come.”
She eyes me suspiciously. “Unless…there’s someone else you’re holding out for.”
I know exactly who she’s referring to. Hell, if she didn’t mention him, I’d question how well she truly knows me.
“It’s not about Noah,” I tell her. “And I wouldn’t hold out for someone who can’t even look at me without getting angry. Even today he furiously put the groceries back in my car like he couldn’t get me out of there fast enough.”
“Wait whoa, what?”
"He’s been having groceries delivered to my house since mom passed. But I don’t need help, especially his. So…I did what any sane, respectable person would do and drove to his house to drop it on his doorstep.
She laughs incredulously. “I would love for someone to bring me food. All Chase ever bought me before we got together was a bag of panties.”
“What?”
“Never mind.” She nudges me. “So, what happened?”
“That’s it. You know he’s a man of few words. I started rambling, he made coffee…”
“So he invited you in…”
“He barked me in.”
She shrugs. “Yeah well, that’s the Reeves brothers' way.”
“Anyway, I called a truce and agreed to all this planning business with him and…I think he accepted but only if I kept all the food? I don’t know. It’s like he doesn’t know what to do with me.”
She grins knowingly. “Sexual frustration.”
“Unresolved anger,” I mutter.
I get home after dinner with Chase and Pepper and can’t shake the idea of Pepper’s proposal. Add one more thing to my pre-two-five bucket list.
It’s tempting. But not with Landon. Not with anyone.
The thought of being with anyone but Noah isn’t something I’ve let myself accept yet. Even after all this time, my heart knows what it wants. And it’s not another man.
It’s the one I let get away.
It’s close to ten o’clock and I’m emotionally drained. Which is probably a good time to pack up more of mom’s things. I’ll be too tired to stop and cry over the sentimental value of it all.
I scan the clutter, wondering where to start when a knock on my door makes me jump.
Who would be at my door this late?
I lift onto my toes to look through the peephole. Seeing a friendly face, I release a breath and unlock the door.
"Mike,” I breathe. “Hey, thanks for all the bubble wrap for my Mom’s china. Bob’s Antiques was thrilled to have it.”
Mike is the Super and my landlord’s oldest son. He’s the most respectful human on the block. He’s been supportive and helpful during my mother’s last years. Always offered to bring up packages and park her car for us when he'd see us pull up to the house—usually from the hospital.
“Oh good. Did you get a lot of money for them?”
I wave him off. “Oh please, that man has given me so many quills for my calligraphy hobby over the years, I couldn’t possibly ask him for money. I was just glad someone valued them as much as mom did.”
Mike steps around nervously, looking at all the contents I have spread over the living room. He sticks his hands in his pockets, and I realize it’s an odd hour for him to be up here.
“Is something wrong?” My eyes widen. “Did I forget to send the rent check? Gosh, I’m sorry, here let me write one now.” I scratch my head because I could have sworn I did.
“No. Uh, no, Charlie, we got your check. It’s…well, my father wanted me to slip this under your door.” He holds up an envelope. “But… I couldn’t do that. You’ve been here practically your whole life and we’re friends and—”
I frown, lifting the thin letter envelope from him. “What is it?”
“You see, since your mother's been living here, we couldn’t raise the rent on her. I mean we could have, by like two percent, but I’ve been fighting my dad on that because it wouldn’t be right to do that to Sara when she was…”
“Mike,” I snap. “Slow down. Just let me read this.”
I look down but all the words are a blur because this can’t be anything good. And my mind and heart can’t handle it.
He sighs heavily. “It basically says the rent for this apartment should be three thousand a month. But he’s only raising it to twenty-eight hundred.”
“Only?” I shriek. “That’s double .” I know mom and I have been lucky to avoid an increase in the last few years, but this is insane. “And for what? Did you put in a new tennis court I don’t know about?” I move frantically to my kitchen and point to the dark spots growing over my counter. “You guys haven’t even fixed this leak that’s looking more and more gross every week.” I look down, skipping over the legalities and running right down to the figure that is my monthly salary if I put in overtime.
“Well, it's a good thing I'm leaving in a month because there's no way I could afford this.” But looking at this number now sure as hell makes me doubt I can make it in the city if this truly is the market.
Mike tears his gaze off the water damage on the ceiling and lowers his head. “I know. I asked him to give you another month since you’re dealing with a death in your family.”
“What do you mean?”
Mike rubs his palms nervously. “He…uh…he refused unless you can pay the difference you sent on your last check. So…” His eyes dip to the envelope and it makes me peek inside.
“It’s my rent check for next month,” I say out loud.
“If…you can’t pay the rest, you need to move out before the first of May.”
“In five days?” I shriek again. “What, did you come up here to help me pack?”
He sighs. “I’m sorry. Of course, I can help with whatever you need.”
“You mean other than a place to live?” I twist, brushing my palm over my forehead as panic surfaces.
Panic. I’m fucking panicking. I've done a damn good job of holding it together in front of people since Mom died. But now…I’m prepared to break down in tears.
And I’ll be damned if I let anyone see it.
I swipe a hand over my face, composing myself. “Thank you, Mike. I’m good. I've been uh…planning my move for weeks so... I’ll just make my arrangements quicker.”
He nods and looks around. “Listen umm…packing supplies can be expensive, especially in the one hardware store in town. Let me bring up some boxes and stuff for you in the morning.” Mike looks at me thoughtfully and I reach out to hug him. It’s not his fault his father is the landlord from hell who’s been ignoring all my emails and voicemails about the water damage that’s changing grotesque colors every day.
“I appreciate everything you’ve done for us, Mike.”
He nods and steps out.
Closing the door, I pull myself together as I look at the valuables I need to figure out what to do with in the next five days.
Before I move myself into my car.
“Looks like skinny dipping and purple tulip tattoos will have to wait.”