Chapter 37
RYAN
Afew weeks after the last time I’d seen Maggie at that bar, I’d dropped back into old routines, but what had happened with her still stung.
Committed to denying that even to myself, however, I woke up at the ass-crack of dawn every morning and worked out until my limbs were numb.
Then I went to work, grabbed takeout for dinner or went out with my friends, and went to sleep.
Every now and then, I’d even gone on a date. None that had led anywhere. I just hadn’t felt it, but since that had been part of my routine before she’d reappeared in my life, I figured I would give it go. I’d barely made it past the appetizers before getting out of there, though.
It was like clockwork.
One time, I hadn’t even made it through my first drink, which was ridiculous considering that I was determined to get over Maggie. But I’d spent almost a month thinking about nothing and nobody else.
Time and again, I’d heard the whole, the best way to get over someone is to get on top of another thing from my friends, but I couldn’t even bring myself to think about it. I literally felt sick to my stomach every time I even tried giving the idea any real consideration at all.
Which was even more ridiculous.
At this rate, I was going to die chemically neutered by own brain. As infuriating and frustrating as that was, however, I was throwing all that pent-up emotion and aggression into my workouts and my work, and at least it was paying off there.
Until I got home one afternoon and my doorman stepped away from his desk. “Mr. Thayer? This came for you today.”
I stopped and glanced at the envelope he was holding out. Instantly, my stomach turned to ice. The embossed lettering on the front of the thick, expensive cardstock held Maggie and Daniel’s names entwined. My heart plummeted, but I took it from him, nodded, and headed up to my apartment.
So this it. She’s sent out the wedding invitations.
Bile rose up the back of my throat, a heavy sensation descending on my insides even as a crack tore through my heart. Opening the envelope with my thumb, I reached in and pulled out the elegant invitation, my gaze scanning the information on it quickly before I realized there was something missing.
For some reason I couldn’t even begin to fathom, she was getting the venue she’d wanted, but there was no mention of the carnival. I read it again to be sure, but there was nothing. Apparently, the reception was taking place in the ballroom.
Every little thing about the wedding that had made Maggie’s eyes light up, outside of the venue itself, seemed to have been eradicated, including the vibrantly colorful ideas she had for the invitation.
This paper was cream-colored and shimmery, the lettering black and elegant. Before I even knew it, I’d crumpled the damn thing in my fist and I was on my way back out.
For the last few weeks, I’d kept to my carefully crafted routine without a single break. It had been designed to keep me away from her, the wedding, and anything even remotely related to a Pembroke, but here I was, shooting all that effort to shit as I tore out of the parking lot and raced upstate.
My brain was barely functioning as I ripped into the parking area of the shady, carnival-ride storage lot, spraying gravel across the yard from how hard I turned in.
Even Brutus and Blanche gave me a wide berth when I jumped out of my car and stormed in, proving that they were smarter than I’d initially given them credit for.
“Ryan?” Steven asked, stepping out from behind one of the trailers with a curious furrow on his brow. He wiped his hands on a rag before shoving it in his back pocket and jogging over. “Is there something I can help you with?”
“Yeah.” I folded my arms and arched an eyebrow at him. “Why isn’t Maggie getting her carnival? We made that booking over a month ago. Don’t tell me it’s suddenly unavailable or—”
Steven sighed. “Son, she isn’t getting it because some guy called and canceled. We were ready to roll. We still are. Everything she wanted is still available, but we took the event off our schedule because we were told it wasn’t necessary anymore.”
I stared back at him in a state of utter disbelief, feeling the fight whoosh out of me when I realized he looked completely genuine. “Some guy called and told you it wasn’t necessary?”
He shrugged. “Yeah, he said the plans for the wedding had changed and told me to keep the deposit.”
“Did you speak to Maggie?” I asked. “Or only this man?”
“Only the guy,” he said. “I asked if Maggie was sure since she seemed so excited, but he was pretty rude. Just told me it was none of my business.”
My eyes slid shut. Probably Cliff, then.
“Like hell, she doesn’t need it anymore.” I reopened my eyes and pulled my phone out of my back pocket. “I’ll pay whatever it costs to put it back on the schedule.”
A slow grin spread across his face as he nodded. “I can do that for you. Are you sure you really want it, though? We were looking forward to doing a wedding for a change, but—”
“She really wants it and she’s the bride, so that’s all that matters.”
Still grinning, he turned toward the trailers and shouted to the carnies that the wedding was back on, and a cheer went up around the lot.
A few of them actually clapped and hollered for me, so at least I knew they were still committed to making Maggie’s day exactly what she wanted it to be, but this was as far as I went.
After making sure I had the correct banking details, I turned on my heels and started toward the car with the carnies still cheering, but when I saw Blanche in my periphery, my feet slammed to a stop of their own accord and I groaned. Shit, this is probably a mistake, but I promised her, didn’t I?
Before common sense had a chance to catch up, I turned around and doubled back to Steve. “Where’s the puppy?”
He laughed. “You still want him? He’s out back by the pen. I’ve been keeping a bag of his food ready in case you came back, but you’ll have to let me explain a few things about how to take care of him before I’ll let him go.”
I sighed but nodded, and an hour later, I was stuck in traffic heading back into the city with a puppy the size of a small bear sitting in my lap. He’d spent the first twenty minutes trying to climb onto my shoulder, then eventually made himself comfortable on my thighs and promptly fell asleep.
What the hell am I doing?
Honestly, I had no idea, but just as he started snoring, my phone rang and Holden’s name appeared on the screen in my car. The puppy barely even twitched when I hit the button on my steering wheel and took the call.
“What’s up? I’m driving, so make it fast.”
“Where the hell are you?” he asked. “Please tell me you’re driving to the bar where you’re supposed to be meeting me.”
“I’m, uh, not. I’m going to be late. Just tell the guys to go ahead without me tonight and have fun.”
“What? No. I—” The puppy let out a loud, whine-snore type sound and Holden cut himself off. “What the fuck was that?”
“A dog.”
“A dog? Why are you driving with a dog?”
“It’s nothing, but I’m going to have to call you back.”
“A dog is not nothing. I get that you’re lonely after—”
“Jesus, Holden. This isn’t that. Just let me call you back when I’m done.” The Pembroke estate on Fifth Avenue was coming up, so I disconnected the call and pulled up outside, carefully lifting the monstrous puppy into my arms before climbing out.
This was easily one of the craziest things I’d ever done in my life, driving across the city to deliver a puppy to a woman who was getting married to another man soon, but I’d promised her I’d bring this dog to her myself if she sent out the invitations, and she’d done it.
Whatever had remained of my common sense was obviously gone, but I marched up the stairs and tried to ignore the towel-sized tongue licking my hand. Banging a fist against the door, I cradled the puppy against my chest, glancing down into his deep brown eyes as I waited for them to answer.
His mouth opened, his tongue lolling out like he was happy as he looked up at me. “Don’t look at me like that, man. You’re a problem.” A beat later, he licked my hand again and I sighed. “Fine. We’re both the problem.”
When the door didn’t open, I banged again. “Depending on how this goes, I’m either never going to see you again or you’re coming home with me instead. I don’t know what to tell you. Just be patient.”
He licked my hand again and I groaned, resigned to bringing him to my place after all, but then the door finally opened. Adelaide stood on the other side with a butler hovering behind her. She frowned when she saw me, the crease between her eyebrows deepening when she noticed the giant in my arms.
“Ryan?” she asked. “Who is this and why is it here?”
I held out the dog. “Here. It’s for Maggie. She’ll know what it’s about.”
With that, I handed him over to the butler. Then I marched back to my car. I was sure I looked insane right around now, simply dropping off a massive puppy and leaving, but it was what it was.
“Ryan, wait!” Adelaide called after me, but I didn’t stop. “Ryan! This isn’t our dog!”
“It is now!” I yelled the reply without turning around, then climbed into my car, breathing hard as I slammed the door and took off.
My heart was hammering and my hands were shaking, so I gripped the steering wheel so hard that my knuckles hurt, but at least it made my hands feel steadier. “What the hell am I doing? What is wrong with me?”
Maybe I’d finally lost my mind or maybe it had already happened weeks ago and I was only acknowledging it now, but either way, it was too late to get it back. I’d always kept my promises and maybe Maggie hated me right now, but the least I could do was keep my promises to her, too.