Chapter 4 - Mikhail
I should be furious, and I am to some degree.
There was a rat in our ranks leaking intel to the very group I’ve been trying to track down and stop, and while he was handled by Nikolai, it still leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. Even knowing the rouse was allowed to go on for as long as it did has me wishing I had put him down myself.
If there’s one, there’s bound to be more, and I don’t want to spend every waking moment rooting out the bastards. I’ve done enough of that already.
If there are more, it’s bound to make Roman restless, and when that happens, it trickles down to the rest of us. An unhappy Pakhan makes the entire empire bleed, and I’m not too keen on that idea.
We’ve been too sloppy about who we’ve allowed in our ranks. And sloppy is dangerous, as Roman has no issue reminding us often.
Yet, despite it all, my day has taken a surprising turn for the better, all because of her. It’s ironic, given the situation, but I’ll take it.
Lily’s sitting in the interrogation room, close to blowing a gasket, well aware of the trap she has wandered into by accident. Even if she’s oblivious to the worst of it still, surely, she knows this isn’t an ideal situation for her.
While unintentional, she stumbled back into my orbit, and something about that feels too good to pass up on. Too good to be true, if I’m being honest.
At first, I thought I imagined her sitting in that chair out of pure desperation, like a hallucination derived from how often I’ve been thinking about her. I was ready to check myself into a ward somewhere.
But it’s really her. The same brown eyes, dark hair, and the same mouth I haven’t stopped thinking about since that night.
While she knows pieces of who I am, she doesn’t know all of it. Not even close.
She didn’t know it then, and she still doesn’t know it now, but I have the feeling she will soon enough.
I never wanted Lily involved in any of this, not with her being an innocent civilian. She was only supposed to be a memory of a thrilling night tucked in the back of my head, but now, she’s right in the middle of it. And now, I can’t let her get away with any knowledge of me or my brothers.
Whether it was a coincidence, fate, or even karma that yanked her back in again, I don’t know. I just know I feel a sick satisfaction from the situation at hand.
As much as I want to hate that she knows more than she should, I’m strangely grateful.
After weeks of thinking about her, I had the chance to look at her up close again. To remember all the parts of the face that pulled me in and haven’t let me go since.
Now, I have a reason to keep her close, regardless of how ridiculous it is.
Standing in the hall with my jaw clenched, a thousand possible outcomes are already moving through my mind. But I need clearance before I can do anything. I have to check in, even if I’d rather not.
Feeling Nikolai’s questioning gaze on me, I already know what he’s thinking before he gets the words out.
“How do you know her?”
I sigh and reach for my phone, hoping he keeps his questions short. “I met her at one of the clubs a few weeks ago.”
His brows lift. “And I’m assuming you did more than share stories about your occupation.”
“Yes, obviously,” I mutter, vaguely annoyed by his prying.
He chuckles and leans against the wall with his arms crossed. “It seems Ivan’s antics are rubbing off on you.”
“Please, my younger brother isn’t an influence on me. None of you is,” I mumble with a shake of my head before I exhale heavily. “But more importantly, she didn’t know anything about me or us at the time. Now she’s in it.”
“Hip-deep,” he returns, allowing a rare but subtle smirk to settle on his lips. “She’s a little on the young side for you, no?”
I scoff and push past him. “Shut up…I’m calling Roman. Keep an eye on her.”
“Sure thing, Casanova,” Nikolai chirps as he chuckles and lingers by the door. “Don’t leave your girl waiting too long.”
My girl.
I shouldn’t enjoy the way that brings me a sense of satisfaction, but I do.
Forcing my brother’s amusement out of my head, I push into one of the empty rooms and close the door behind me before settling in a chair.
Scrolling through my contacts, I find Roman and hit the call button.
He picks up on the second ring, sighing before his groggy voice comes through.
“Do you have any idea what time it is?”
“Yes, I do,” I hum, grinning to myself while I lean back. “Sounds familiar.”
Another breath from him, then he murmurs, “Are you calling because someone’s dead or because someone needs to be?”
“Maybe somewhere in the middle.”
“Then get on with it.”
Despite enjoying teasing him every once in a while, I get to it, well aware that the situation is more important than my mind is letting me believe, given how close Lily currently is.
“We ran into a problem tonight. Nikolai and the guys flushed out a rat, and in the middle of handling it, a woman in the alley saw it go down,” I begin, absently stroking my chin. “…and I happen to know who the witness is.”
He pauses, and then his words come out almost hesitantly. “Let me guess, you’ve had sex with this woman before.”
Despite being alone, I can’t fight the sheepish expression on my face. “Yeah.”
“Christ, Mikhail…” he mumbles, letting me hear the slight defeat in his tone.
“How was I to know she’d end up stumbling onto the scene?” I say back, hoping to find any kind of defense for myself. “She wasn’t supposed to see anything—nobody was. But she did, so now I’m asking how you want me to handle this.”
“She’s seen too much clearly,” Roman returns, and the sound of him shifting in bed, followed by his distant footsteps, reaches my end. “You know the protocol as well as anyone else.”
“I do,” I affirm, trying to take it seriously, given the potential risks of it all. “But I want to be certain. You’re passing the reins to me?”
“Yes, yes,” he murmurs, followed by the sound of familiar cooing in the background. “Handle it quietly—make it clean. You don’t need my permission.”
I pause at that. Even though I know he’s being sincere, I can’t help but ask, “You sure?”
“I have one child to watch over…I don’t need to babysit you, too, Mikhail,” he remarks, leaving no room for doubt. “Do what you have to and put this shit to bed.”
Without another word, he ends the call, leaving me in the room's silence.
Roman rarely gives free control to anyone, but he just did.
Meaning I can do this however I want. The possibilities are endless.
Standing, the idea is already forming in the back of my mind. I know it’s brash and impulsive, but it clicks into place so quickly it feels almost like fate if I believed in that kind of thing.
Lily is a liability, but now, she’s my liability. Maybe it’s selfish, but I don’t want to let her go.
I don’t want her to vanish again—not when I spent long enough thinking about her and wanting to see her again.
That irrational part of my brain wants to keep her, and regardless of how crazy that might be, at least the solution in my mind will help me do exactly that.
My steps echo down the hallway, and I gesture for the other two guards to join us. Reaching Nikolai, I give him a nod. He opens the door, letting me in first while the others hover on standby.
Lily looks up at me fast, and I don’t miss the panic behind her eyes through her glasses. She freezes at the sight of me and goes to speak, but nothing comes out.
I don’t say anything at first either, letting myself see the potential outcome of my plan unfolding in my mind.
I doubt she’ll like what I’m thinking, but it beats the alternative. Maybe she’ll understand that with time, maybe not.
Either way, I step aside and motion towards her with my head while I keep my hands in my pockets. “Get her up.”
Her eyes widen. “What? What does that mean?”
Nobody answers while they move forward and go to grab her arms. She jerks back instinctively, looking almost wounded as she slips into a more defensive approach.
“Don’t touch me.”
“Take it easy,” I murmur, making sure to stay within her sight. “You’re just being moved somewhere a little more comfortable.”
Despite my vague answer, she stops struggling enough to look at me with disbelief. “Where are you taking me? You said you weren’t going to hurt me.”
I don’t like the sight of her fear, but I know it can’t be helped at the moment. It’s only temporary, anyway. Soon enough, she’ll see that I’m not a monster.
The two guards help Lily to her feet, using enough force to ensure compliance, but not enough to cause any harm. If they did, they’d have to answer to me.
“And I meant it.”
Once she’s stabilized, she searches my face, and her voice cracks slightly. That desperate plea in her eyes isn’t missed by me. “Please, Mikhail…”
An involuntary thrill runs down my back at the sound of my name leaving her lips again, and I remind myself to keep it together. I can’t lose my mind here.
She has no idea how dangerous it is for her to say it like that. Not when I’m already in far deeper than I should be.
Giving them a brief nod, I leave the room, walking ahead with a calm stride.
While we move through the warehouse, I can feel her eyes on me, surely questioning what my next move will be.
I could tell her, but I know it will only make her freak out more. It’ll send her over the edge, and I can’t have that yet.
I need to get her home first.
For the time being, I’ll let her keep guessing.