Chapter 38
CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT
TY
Ramiel is quiet for a long moment. Sweat trails down my temples despite the icy shower I just took.
The locker room is almost completely vacant, hence the only reason I feel comfortable telling him about my chat with Coach and a third party from HR earlier.
Practice was excruciating after that. Did anyone else know?
As I surveyed the guys and their reactions to me, I didn’t pick up on anything.
“So they’re hitting you with a fine?” Ramiel finally says.
I nod.
“Could be worse,” he adds.
“I know.”
Every team approaches contract violations differently, but there is one thing that is handled almost unanimously across the league.
They view the cheerleaders as replaceable.
It’s not fair, but it’s the nature of the beast. I don’t know much about that side of it, but what I do know is that cheerleaders have been let go for less than being caught in public with a team member.
And Avery was living in my house. Living with me.
If they only knew, maybe my consequences would have been worse or my fine a little higher.
I’m so stupid. How could I have let this happen? My stomach clenches as I wonder what happened to Avery. Why hasn’t she reached out to me?
“I can’t believe he told you before the game this Sunday,” Ramiel interrupts my sinking thoughts. “Figured they’d want to keep you focused on that.”
“If it wasn’t before this game, it’d be before another one. Season isn’t over yet.”
His voice lowers. “I don’t want you to get in your head about it, but you better keep your nose to the grindstone for the rest of the season. I’ve seen guys traded for less. It’s probably better if you… If you let her go for a while.”
Anxiety ricochets through me as the one thing I’d been fearing since joining the Kings comes to fruition. “I’m not in my head about it. She’s got somewhere else to stay, so she’s safe. I can focus on the rest of the season now.”
Ramiel closes his locker and turns to face me, his lips pursing for a split second before he says, “You’re a nice guy, Ty. You know that?”
A guffaw escapes me as we turn and start the long trek home. “Stop trying to butter me up.”
“Why would I be buttering you up? All I’m saying is, sure, maybe sometimes you make the wrong choice, but a lot of times you don’t. I’m glad you’re on the team. I’m glad you’re my friend.”
I stop in my tracks at his last statement. I guess I knew we were friends all along, but hearing him say it hits me right in… well, my feels. “Thanks, man. I’m glad to have you as a friend.”
“You could have more, ya know. If you’d act like this around everyone.” His eyes lock ahead as he adds, “Despite your best efforts, you’re a likable guy. I wish you’d let the rest of the team see that. Maybe then you’d have an easier go of things.”
I grunt in response.
“Might try to find some common ground with them. It could help.”
“Common ground like what?”
He shrugs. “I don’t know. You’re always reading. Maybe start a book club.”
“A book club?” I snort. “No one wants to be in a book club.”
“No one wanted to meet up for karaoke nights, but Maleko was relentless. Now it’s a ritual. We couldn’t escape if we tried.”
“Fair.” I don’t add that Maleko is likable, like a giant teddy bear you love, regardless how many times you trip over it when it’s splayed across the floor.
We round the corner as we make our way out to the lot, and I spot some of our teammates ahead. One of them lags behind, and I slow my walk so as not to catch up, but Ramiel freezes.
“I forgot something, I, uh—I need to go back to get it.” And that’s all he says before disappearing down the echoey hall on squeaking sneakers.
That jack-knob. He knows exactly what he’s doing. And despite everything, I can’t help but ruminate about what he said. About apologizing. About being likable. Decker turns around, spotting me immediately. I blame Ramiel’s screechy exit.
I bite the bullet. I’ve made too many mistakes today. If I can’t right those wrongs, maybe I can right this one.
“Hey man,” I begin.
Decker’s staring right at me, but he still looks surprised that I’ve spoken. “Oh, hey.”
When I jog to catch up, he looks even more shocked. He clears his throat. “Good work today.”
“Yeah, you too.” I fall in step beside him for a few quiet, awkward moments before mustering the words I know I need to say.
Digging deep, I swallow my pride and pour out the long-overdue apology.
“Look, I should have mentioned this a long time ago, but I can’t help but notice how tense things have been since training camp, and I know why. ”
The exit looms ahead, and I can see the rest of our teammates pushing through the doors to the parking lot, slowing down to chat. I only have a few more moments to get this off my chest before there’s a chance someone might overhear.
“I shouldn’t have gone so hard. You were right. I should’ve scaled back. And I’m sorry. I should have said that a long time ago. And I never shoulda brought your girl into it.” As the words leave my lips, Decker’s demeanor seems to lighten, and I know I’ve finally done the right thing.
“It’s not a big deal, Ty. I appreciate you saying that, but I should have let it go. Maybe I was being a pansy.” Decker shrugs. “I’ve just had a lot on my mind.”
There’s something distant in his stare as we close in on the exit. Part of me wants to pry into it, see if he needs to get something off his chest like I’ve just done. Lord knows it’s a relief to finally speak your piece. But when he turns and smiles at me, I leave it be.
“We good?” he asks.
I nod. “We’re good.”
And that’s it. He offers a little nod, and then he’s retreating to his car.
It’s like the sky opens up and God beams a spotlight down on me, burning up any unwillingness to atone for all my wrongdoings.
It felt good to finally get that off my chest, despite how embarrassed I was to say it out loud.
Decker was so willing to forgive me and move past it all.
I hold onto hope that he isn’t the only one in my life who so easily lets things go.
My sister—my blood, twin, all that—she’s built of the same stuff I am.
Even though we’re family, something tells me she won’t move on as easily as Decker.
But if apologizing to him is the right thing to do, my sister definitely deserves an apology.
And then my mind flips to Avery.
At the end of the day, my career and family mean a lot but—though I’ve tried to deny it—Avery means the most. She deserves only good things, and even though I’m not perfect, I want to be for her.
I want to try to be. It’s the least I can do.
Avery deserves someone solid. Someone willing to step up and admit when they’ve done something wrong.
I don’t want to move on from Avery, and I don’t want her to move on to someone else because I want to be what she needs, the place she turns when she’s drowning in a world of chaos.
If it’s the last thing I do in my life, and I hope it is, I want to be a solid, safe place for Avery Hinkley.
Now that I know that, I need to straighten up my life.
That’s the first step to being dependable.
Get your life in order so you can focus on what truly matters.
Condemning Maggie—and my mom—for falling in love is hypocritical.
What if the roles were reversed? Sure, I always said marriage wasn’t for me, but that was before Avery.
Now I know how wrong I was, so who am I to say who they should fall in love with?
When I finally spoke to Maggie after our argument, regardless of how she tried to bury things, the phone call was tense.
It still didn’t feel quite normal, quite like us.
And I love Maggie too much not to at least bring something up.
Dad… Her engagement… Haven’t I always trusted her judgment?
Why did that suddenly stop because she made choices that I, personally, wouldn’t choose?
Even if things were heated, I love her too much not to at least try to come to a resolution with her, to hear her out.
As I climb into my SUV, I let the phone connect to my Bluetooth speaker, and before I can second-guess my choice, I say two words. “Call Maggie.”
My sister sniffs. “Thanks for calling. I’d been meaning to do the same. I’m sorry I said—”
“Maggie, you don’t need to apologize again. It’s fine. We’re fine. I was being an idiot. You told me I was, and you were right.” I press my phone tighter to my cheek like someone might overhear as I make my way through my empty house. My chest squeezes as I can’t help but ask, “How is he?”
“Dad’s fine. I don’t think he can make it, so we probably sidestepped a disaster there.” She lets out a defeated laugh.
Immediately, instinct takes over, the one that makes me want to protect the ones I love. I may not have wanted to see him at her nuptials, but I also didn’t want Maggie to get rejected by our dad—again. “Screw him.”
“Ty, it’s okay.”
“No, Maggie. It’s not. I can tell from your voice he hurt you. He—”
“Ty, I’m letting it go, and you should too.
We don’t need him. We never have, and now that Anthony and I have finally sorted things out, we’re in a steady place.
I’m on the path to making my own family.
I mean, I’m grateful to Dad for my existence—our existence—but that’s it.
” She sighs. “Don’t let him be the reason you’ve built your walls so high.
I know I apologized for everything else, but I meant it when I said you were too guarded.
You are. And you’re only hurting yourself. I won’t apologize for being honest.”
As always, Maggie’s right. I’ve missed her straight shooting. I sigh. “And I wouldn’t want you to.”
“You sure? Kinda sounds like you’re being a liiittle bit sensitive.”
“Okay, Maggie. Lighten up on me.”
She laughs. “Honesty is the best policy, you know that.”
“Glad to see you’re still using the same old excuses.”
“I just want you to be as happy as I am. Don’t let dumb people from your past affect your future, okay? That’s all I’m sayin’.”
“Maggie’s a poet.”
“And I didn’t even know it.” I can hear the smile in her voice.
The silence drags on for a long moment as the words settle between us, and then finally, I know it’s time to end this call. It’s time to make a call I’ve been dreading since I told her goodbye.
“I’ll call you tomorrow, okay? I got some stuff I need to do,” I say.
“Okay. Me too. Love ya, Ty.”
“You too, Mags.”
When she hangs up, I dial Avery. My heart pounds against my ribs as the phone rings, but she doesn’t pick up.