Chapter 3
“What am I seeing here?”
Maria was at least grateful that Violet did not take this moment to yell, which would attract even more attention. Instead, she was standing in front of the two of them with her arms folded out in front of her.
Her expression went from shock to concern, and then a lingering curiosity. Violet was waiting for an answer.
“I...” Maria tried to explain herself, but then the words caught in her throat, and she trained her gaze instead to the ground.
“You should ask Miss Havenford,” the duke replied. “It is her evening.”
The sound of Maria’s name in his mouth made her throat tighten. She could not meet Violet’s eyes.
She swallowed and tried again. There was no point in lying; she did not think her chest could bear the strain of inventing a better story than the one that had just happened.
“I made a mistake.”
“What mistake, sweetheart?” Violet’s hand whitened on the latch, but she kept her voice gentle.
“It is my fault. only mine.” Her heart was pounding, and she made herself look at Violet, because cowardice would not help now. “I thought this was Mr. Morton’s room. It is not. I am sorry. I… I did not mean…” She gestured helplessly at the scene around her.
The Duke of Verwood had the gall to let his mouth curve. He did not laugh. Maria could not have borne it if he had laughed.
“Peter’s room,” Violet said. She looked at the duke. “You exchanged chambers.”
“We did,” Stephen said.
“Why,” Violet asked, “would you do that?”
“I have already explained to Miss Havenford here,” Stephen shrugged his shoulders. “But I get the sense that is not the most important thing to discuss at the moment.”
“Why would you risk yourself like this?” Violet turned to Maria now. “I cannot imagine why you would willingly walk into someone’s chambers like this, wanting to be discovered.”
“It was only Peter…”
“Still, why even Peter? Why anyone?” Violet was truly worried now. “Do you understand that it puts you in a very challenging situation?”
Maria did not know how to respond. In earnest, she did not fully understand the consequences of her own actions.
“Maria,” Violet was pacing now. Maria had never seen her so worried before. “What have you gotten yourself into?”
“I was only…”
“Do you understand the scandal such a thing will create?” Violet asked before Maria could complete her thought.
“If Nicholas is to find out, then he would surely challenge Stephen to a duel. Being discovered in a gentleman’s chamber like this carries dire consequences for a lady. Surely, you must be aware of them.”
Maria opened her mouth to speak, and then shut it back up. It was not an ideal setting, sure. But Maria barely understood why it would be a big matter that would lead to a duel.
“It would be good if you did not panic so much,” Maria frowned.
“But you have given me cause to panic,” Violet said, shaking her head. “I think that you do not know that in our society, this is the worst smear that a woman can have on her before marriage.”
Maria felt her breath hitch. Violet’s description was making it sound much less appealing than what she had gauged from the overheard conversation earlier. She thought that it would be an inconvenience at best, but ultimately, it would bring her closer to the goal of getting married.
But somehow, listening to Violet now, it seemed to be the opposite.
“Oh, tell me,” Violet turned to face her, “what possessed you to do such a thing?”
Because I am tired of being a guest, Maria did not say. Because I am tired of not belonging to my own future, and because I wish to be married as soon as I can.
“You and Nicholas have been so kind. You feed me and I occupy your rooms. We have known one another for such a short time, and I am already one more thing that must be accounted for,” she sighed, letting herself be honest. “You are almost strangers to me; I am one to you. I am grateful, and I am afraid of exhausting your kindness. If I am married, I will at least be… placed. I will cease to be a burden you do not admit is a burden.”
“You are not a burden,” Violet said immediately. The panic in her voice shifted slightly to make room for her concern.
But the atmosphere of the room had changed entirely after her little speech. Maria had made her point, and even the duke seemed caught off guard. Was it sympathy that she saw in his expression? She dared not let her gaze linger too long, lest it confirm it.
“I know what it is to host an extra person,” Maria said miserably. “It is not a thing I wish to be, in anyone’s life.”
“Have we ever made you feel as though you are a burden?” Violet asked. Bless her, she was too kind. “We have tried our best to make you feel welcome, if anything.”
“No, you misunderstand me. It is not you who makes me feel as though I am imposing, rather it is my own understanding of things.” Maria shook her head.
“But it is not something that you need to say out loud. In time, you shall feel it, and I fear that will be too late. To preserve our relationship, it is better if I find myself a home.”
“You believe that we will grow tired of you?” Violet said.
Maria did not answer, but the answer was implied, and it was a resounding yes.
“And this is the way that you choose to go about it?” Stephen added, but Violet shot him a look. “Peculiar methods, I would just like to add.”
“Yes, I agree with you,” Maria nodded. “My methods have not been the best, and perhaps there has been a grave miscalculation on my part. But I intend on making my intention clear and…”
“Maria, I believe you need to relax,” Violet said as she came over to her. Suddenly, it was as though they had switched places. Now, Maria was the one panicking, and Violet was the one who was trying to get her to calm down. “We can find a way.”
Stephen stepped closer to them, eyeing them both for a moment with a peculiar curiosity. Strangely, though, Maria did not feel judged by him.
“It is precisely the moment for practicalities.” He folded his arms. The motion made his forearms deliberate, and Maria panicked again at the sight.
She had never seen a man like this up close, and it unsettled her, but not in a bad way.
“Your Grace,” he said to Violet, “you have two tasks: first, to keep someone from opening this door again; second, to decide whether you wish for a scandal or a solution.”
“I wish for neither,” Violet snapped. “I wish the last five minutes had not happened.”
“As do I,” Maria whispered.
Stephen looked at her, and something very small in his face changed.
“Miss Havenford,” he said, “you thought this was my cousin’s chamber.”
“Yes.”
“And you thought… what? That if you were seen here, he would be forced to the altar?”
“I…people speak as if it is so. A recipe.”
“Where did you get that idea from?” Stephen asked.
“Well,” she bit down her lip, “It matters not where I got the idea from, but surely, it is not unheard of.”
“Yes, but we hear a great many things in society,” Stephen continued. “That does not mean that we must emulate them.”
“Forgive me, then,” Maria was feeling helpless now. “I do not quite know what it is that I must emulate, and what it is that I must refrain from.”
I am still learning, she thought to herself. But somehow, she was learning in the harshest ways possible.
“It is a bit too late for apologies,” Stephen sighed. “We have already been discovered.”
“You should have told me you felt this way,” Violet made a soft sound of grief.
“I did not want to make you choose between protecting me and protecting your peace.” Maria’s voice wobbled, “Nicholas does too much already. I have a roof because of you both; I have my gowns because of you. My name is yours. But it is borrowed. And men look at me as if they cannot decide whether I am tame or tragic, and I do not know which is worse.”
“You are neither,” Violet was quick to correct her.
“I do not know any of this conversation about being a burden, or tame or tragic. But all I know is that tonight,” Stephen said lightly, “she is simply in the wrong room.”
Violet swung toward him, temper igniting again.
“And you… You could have sent her away the moment you realized she was here. Do not pretend you could not. You did not try very hard.”
“I did not wish to haul her by the arm into a corridor where a footman might take notice,” he said in his defense.
“You might have rung for a maid…”
“To collect a woman from my bedchamber?” His brows rose. “Would that have improved the situation?”
“No,” Violet grimaced, understanding the point that he was trying to make. “I suppose I see what you mean.”
Stephen gave Violet a pointed look. Hearing him speak, Maria got the sense that the duke was someone who liked being right. And always having the last word in.
An argument with him would be truly a nightmare, she thought to herself.
“Then spare me your revision of the last two minutes,” he said to Violet, “I did not wish to shame her.”
The four words seemed to surprise Violet as much as they surprised Maria.
“You did not?” Violet asked.
“No.” He looked back at Maria. “And it would have been… unwise to open the door. Which, I believe, brings us to our present difficulty.”
“Our difficulty is that my sister-in-law is in your chamber at midnight, Your Grace. The rest can be filled in by any gossip within a mile,” Violet replied.
“Not if you walk away now,” he said. “Not if we all do. The house is not yet stirring. We have a grace period of minutes. But the world will, at dawn, awaken in its usual state of appetite. You know how hunger is, and we must prevent things from getting to that point.”
“You cannot expect me to stride out of here and pretend,” Violet argued.
Maria could only listen. Once again, she felt as though she had no say in what the course of her life would take.
It made her feel helpless again, but she was the one who put herself in this situation without fully understanding the consequences.
“I expect you to consider the end you want and walk toward it,” he returned.
“And what end do you suggest?”