Chapter 32 #2
‘I just really like it here,’ I said. ‘I visited here last summer, on a work trip, and I knew it was a place that suited me. And you know, it’s good to have places like this in the world, somewhere to go, where you feel you belong.
When things go wrong again… which they will, I can always come back and go swimming and see you all again, and feel better.
’ I looked at Henry and Lucy. ‘I feel like you two have adopted me.’
‘It’s the other way around. You’ve adopted us,’ said Lucy. ‘Have you had a good evening?’
‘You know something…’ I was smiling at them both, feeling something more than happiness, that giddiness which had infused Henry the other night had now infected me.
I felt excitement that life was going not just to be okay, but it was going to be marvellous, as though I’d been given permission, as though I’d been released. ‘I’ve had an awesome evening,’ I said.
Lucy looked pleased. ‘I’m so glad. I sometimes worry that if you hadn’t come into the café that day, you might actually be relaxing and reading books or even going to Trá Beag, wherever that is, and finding your people.’
‘Yeah, but that can wait.’ I sat down again. ‘I’m happy right now.’
Henry was looking pleased as well, as though he and Lucy felt personally responsible for my happiness, as if this vacation was going to work out for me.
And it had. It just wasn’t conventional.
But I was done with being conventional. When I returned to Boston, maybe I would change a few things, maybe I wouldn’t work quite so hard.
Maybe I would move into community work more, find a group like my Irish knitters, something which wasn’t about maximising profits but something more meaningful.
I was thinking of the two young women with the plant subscription-prescription, of how one of them had grown up helping her mother run a care home and she had put plants everywhere and it had completely changed the environment.
It looked better, the air was fresher and it was a simple and inexpensive change that made people happier.
That should have been my pitch. I had spent all these years thinking business was about product and supply, but what people wanted was connection.
Ellie stood up. ‘Time to go,’ she said.
‘I’ll walk you home,’ said Cormac immediately. ‘I need my beauty sleep too.’
‘Are you going in my direction?’ asked Ellie, surprised.
‘I need the exercise,’ he said. ‘Helps with the beauty sleep.’ He smiled at her and she seemed very contented to be squired home.
Jules was next to leave, as he had to wake early to open the café, and we saw him cycle off from the marina, his bike wobbling as he navigated the path up to the main road.
And then it was Lucy who was next to yawn. ‘I’m going home. I think the party’s over. And I’m tired. Website building is intense.’
‘I’d better go home too,’ I said.
‘Or another drink?’ said Henry. ‘You’re on holiday, after all?’
‘Yes,’ said Lucy, firmly. ‘Do not come home yet. Stay out and try to have something of a holiday. I’ll see you for a swim in the morning.’ She looked right at me. ‘Don’t stay up too late.’
‘I’ve no intention of it,’ I said, standing up and giving her a hug.
I didn’t want the night to end. I’d spent my life making sure I was in bed early enough in order to work the next day, to pore over spreadsheets, to talk to clients, to prepare business plans, to give speeches and talks.
And now, at this moment, I wanted to stay right here in Sandycove, with Caitlin all around, the sky a canopy of stars.
But it was late and even the Harbour Bar was closing up, and so there was nothing we could do except call it a night. Or an early morning.
Henry walked me home through the dark and deserted streets of Sandycove and, at the hotel, we hugged.
Just a friendly, goodbye, too-many-Sandycove-Slings hug, but it changed from something lightly sociable into something lingering and we held on a little too long, my body sinking into him, his arms around me, wondering if it would be okay to stay here forever.
I didn’t want to leave. Not this moment, nor this place.
Boston was too much, too far away, too everything.
I needed to find out how this story ended.
Somehow I pulled away.
‘I’ve come up with my rules,’ he said.
I laughed. ‘Oh yes?’
‘Well, the person in question must love mountains, you know that one.’
‘It’s a good one. I highly agree with that one.’
‘They must have an appreciation for garden birds. Robins and blue tits.’
‘Of course.’
‘They must like to read books, funny books, clever books, not-clever books.’
I thought of Persuasion up in my room. I was determined to finish it. In fact, I would read it all night and finish it by morning. ‘I’m the same,’ I said.
‘And they must be beautiful…’ He gazed at me for a moment.
‘With a gorgeous smile. And eyes that light up. And they must be adventurous and loving and interesting. They must make me want to be with them all the time. They have to make me want to think about nothing but them, to want to spend the rest of my life with them, in each other’s pockets… ’
We stood contemplating each other. For a moment, I thought my heart had stopped. ‘In each other’s pockets,’ I echoed.
‘Yes.’
‘I like those rules. The birds. And the smile and the books. All of them.’
‘Me too.’ His eyes were on mine. ‘Would you like to come for another sail?’
I nodded, not able to speak. It had been a magical time. From the moonlight, the phosphorescence, the stars. I was finally on holiday and everything had fallen into place.
‘I’ll see you tomorrow,’ he said, gently.
‘See you tomorrow.’ I smiled at him.
He opened his mouth to say something and then closed it again.
‘What were you going to say?’
‘I was going to say…’ He hesitated and then my phone rang.
‘It’s my mom,’ I said.
‘You’d better take it. You can’t not take a call from your mother.’
‘I suppose not.’ We looked at each other. The phone kept ringing.
‘I’ll see you tomorrow,’ he said again, and waved as he turned and walked away.
‘Mom?’
‘I’m worried about you. I thought you’d died. You never let your phone ring that long.’
‘I was in the middle of something.’
‘Like what?’
‘Oh, just talking to someone.’
‘Well, I’m glad you answered. I wanted to tell you I love you.’
‘I love you too.’
‘And I’ve been thinking of you and Milhouse.
I am just so happy you ended it with him.
I ran into his mother earlier and she seemed to think you were still together.
She certainly didn’t mention the Bloomingdale’s woman.
But I thought how glad I was that we won’t be related to that family. Ice-cold she is.’
I was standing in the street, watching Henry as he walked away. And then he turned suddenly, and raised a hand.
‘Good luck tomorrow!’ I called.
‘Tomorrow?’
‘Your date!’
He stopped smiling and seemed to begin to say something and then shrugged, with a final wave, and kept walking.
‘Who were you talking to?’ Mom asked.
‘Henry.’
‘Henry? Is he nice?’ I could hear Mom’s brain working. ‘Who is he going on a date with?’
‘Mom, please. I’ll call you tomorrow. It’s nearly 1 a.m. here.’
‘Sleep well, Kerry-Anne. I love you. Goodbye.’
‘Goodbye. I love you too.’