Chapter 15
fifteen
In need of fresh air, I step onto the balcony.
The building’s front door creaks open and slams closed below me.
I grip the railing and look below to find Evan marching down the stairs, across the sidewalk, and stepping into the street.
He’s changed into dry clothing—jeans, running shoes, and a dark pullover.
A backpack’s slung over his shoulder. By the hasty exit, he appears eager to escape me.
He waves down a taxi from a group of passing vehicles. A yellow cab stops, red brake lights shining. Evan opens the back door and hops inside.
I let out a huff as it speeds away, and slips into traffic before heading north.
Back inside, I drop into my big chair and prop my feet on the ottoman.
Kicking off my shoes, I sink further into the cushions and release an exasperated breath.
I reach for his handwritten card and flip it between my fingers, mentally replaying every time Evan has propositioned me.
Looking back, I can count many. Most of the time, I ignored him.
It wasn’t until Aggie’s relationship proclamation that I started to pay attention.
Why is it okay for him to do it and not me?
Has he been full of crap this entire time?
I toss the card aside, not caring when it lands on the floor. I need guidance from someone, even if that someone is Aggie. I dig my cell from my pocket and speed-dial her number.
She picks up on the fifth ring, her voice garbled, and I check the nearest clock. It’s early. Is she sleeping already?
“Get over here,” I tell her, regardless.
“What’s going on?” she mumbles with a whine, clearly pouting.
“No time to talk. Knock on apartment 1A’s door.”
I hang up, keeping it cryptic.
Thirty minutes later, there’s a knock on Evan’s front door. I’ve been here a few minutes. I open the door to reveal Aggie in the hallway, her arms crossed and blond hair springing in every direction. She gives me a pout. The same one she’s probably had since I called her.
“Whose apartment is this?” She pushes past with an attitude and stomps in, removing her puffy coat. Underneath, she’s wearing flannel banana pajamas and sparkly Uggs. She kicks off the boots, leaving them where they fall.
I shut the door, grab her hand, and lead Her Royal Crankiness into the hall. I flip on the light switch and point to the photo of Evan, the one where he’s working on the Habitat house, half-nude and looking like a marble statue of a Roman god.
“You remember my landlord?”
Aggie’s suddenly awake, her eyes wide, and leans her face closer to the bare-chested photo. She can’t peel her interested gaze away. “Are those real?” She lifts her finger to the glass to press his abs, like each one is a button on her cell phone.
“Very real, and they look even better in person.”
She straightens. “Did you finally sleep with this slice of man-meat lovers, deep-dish pizza and not tell me?” Her voice rises to an annoyed pitchy squeak. “Living vicariously through you when you do something awesome doesn’t work unless you give me all the details.”
“I told you already, I tried. He won’t give in.”
“Why the hell not? You’re stunning . . . when you’re not all Texas Chainsaw Massacre.” The light brightens behind her eyes and she gasps. Her mouth forms an O. “That’s why you’ve been dolled up lately. It’s because of him, isn’t it?”
“That’s what I’m telling you. I tried. I took your advice to heart. I mean, you know what happened the other night—”
“I remember.” She holds her hand flat in the air, making a plane noise before it dive-bombs and crashes.
“Well, yeah—okay. Sure. But . . .”
“Tell me this . . .” She moves to the sofa and sits, and I join her. “How was your kiss?”
“How was it?” My brows knit together.
Even though our kiss has been at the forefront of my mind for weeks, I can’t tell her it was the first I can ever remember. That it made my toes curl, my pulse race, my skin heat, and my legs wrap around his waist and tug him closer.
My gaze drops to the floor. “It was—nice.”
“Nice?” She guffaws. “You pulled me from bed for nice?”
“That reminds me, why were you in bed so early?”
“Don’t change the subject.” She points.
I sigh. “Okay, fine. It was hot. We have this gravitational thing.” My fingers and hands twist in a tight maddening motion of energy as if the wild gesture will explain how I feel about him.
“Gravitational?” She looks unconvinced.
“Chemistry?” I try a new word and scrunch my nose. “After I told him I wanted him for one night, no strings, he pushed me away and said he couldn’t be with me because I couldn’t handle it. That I wasn’t that type of girl, and he doesn’t want a girlfriend.”
Her eyes wide, she sinks back into the cushions of the couch. She folds her arms over her chest, all the gears cranking behind her pale blue eyes.
“Say something.” I slap the arm of the couch.
“I’m still shocked you tried.”
“Unfortunately, I tried again. Earlier tonight.” I wince.
“You didn’t.” She cups her hands over her mouth and yelps like she’s imagining the disaster.
“He rejected me again.”
“So you back off and move on. It’s not like you don’t have a waiting list. On to James, right?”
“That’s the thing. I’ve built up Evan in my head and made it a challenge I can’t lose. And . . . I think . . . I think I like him.”
Aggie looks worried now. One of the few things I’ve learned about myself from after is I have an unhealthy obsession with winning. I can never surrender.
Even my parents warned me about this in stories of my younger years. I had to win when I ran track in high school, and was just as driven to sell the most boxes of Girl Scout cookies. If I had to buy every box myself, I would. Competition and winning are in my DNA.
I’ve seen the proof in the years after when I crushed my placement tests and returned to college. Then I proceeded to finish at the top of my class. I’m always improving my running time, and at work, I need to close deals. There’s a reason I’m the youngest associate at Grayson & Wade.
“I know what you’re thinking, but I know he likes me too.
For whatever reason, he holds back,” I say, believing it.
It was all he could do to keep his hands to himself tonight.
“And that night we had dinner, he seemed happy Lou had broken up with me. He even mentioned he checked up on me at work. I assume through Linden. Aren’t those things you do when you’re into someone?
There’s a spark between us, even if he can’t admit it. ”
Disbelief pinches Aggie’s face. “What’s going on with you? I can’t talk you into anything for over a year, and now Evan has you telling lies, dressing in red, and all hot and bothered?”
“You’re right. What the hell am I doing?” I raise my hands in exasperation.
“You need to back off of this one. If you must, dress sexy or play your little head games with him, but from a distance. You don’t want to fall into the stalker category.”
“Why are you suddenly so reasonable? What happened to your crazy side?”
Groaning, I slouch into my seat, mentally exhausted. She uses the opportunity to kick up her legs and rest her feet on my lap.
“I think I came on too strong with Paul. It sort of sucks, and I don’t want you dealing with the same thing. I’m telling you, it’s killing my mojo. He’s all I can think about. I mean, look at my new socks.” She wiggles her toes.
I grab them in shock. “Black socks?”
“I know. Not a sparkle, not a bead, not even a pattern.”
“The horror.” I feign shock, playing along.
She pulls back her legs and crosses them, then leans closer with a serious face. “Did we do a Freaky Friday, Hot Chick, Vice Versa, 13 Going on 30 switchy-body thing? Are you still you? ’Cause I’m not sure I’m still me.” She squishes her boobs with her splayed hands.
I cup mine. “Nope, mine are still small, and yours appear huge, as always.”
Her face relaxes, looking relieved.
“So, where’s Evan? Does he know we’re in his apartment? Or are you already in stalker mode?” She peers around.
“He was nice enough not to leave me without hot water for another night. He gave me his key and went to stay with a friend.”
“I see what this is.” She settles back against the arm of the sofa.
“Please tell me, because I’m at a complete loss.” I rub my hands over my thighs. “All I’ve seen since I moved here is Evan with a different girl at Mr. Moon’s every week. You know he has to be bringing them home. I don’t understand why I can’t be one of them.”
“Maybe he’s already with someone, and that’s the friend he went to stay with. Or maybe you’ve been misjudging him. Maybe he’s a nice guy who thinks it wouldn’t be fair to sleep with someone that he has to see every day.”
Aggie’s words strike me dumb. She’s right.
I should leave this alone. Who am I to push myself on someone?
Especially when they might have a friend with benefits already—or something.
Maybe Evan would be uncomfortable seeing me every day afterward.
I didn’t bother to ask him because I’ve been too focused on my own selfish goals.
At the revelation, I’m undecided if I’ll stay the night.
I can sleep in my own bed and return in the morning to use the shower.
But who am I kidding? Being here is too enticing.
Even if I’m stepping away from my little game, I need to know more about him.
Now that I’ve set my sights, I’ve been looking at him in a new light, questioning what he’s about and why I haven’t paid attention to him in the past. In two dangerous words—I’m curious.
Yes, we’ve talked a lot over the last year, but he’s always hidden behind that teasing macho facade.
One look at his photos, and anyone can see he’s more than that.
He’s caring. He’s adventurous. And despite turning me down, he’s shown me kindness.
Regardless of the idiotic words that come from his mouth when he’s teasing me, his actions evoke a different image.
It’s an image of someone who gives a damn.