7. Caitlin
CHAPTER SEVEN
caitlin
Acouple days had passed since Jake helped me move boxes, but I hadn’t been able to dwell on the awkwardness of the vibrator situation other than having a fleeting moment of, “It’s broken anyway” was the best response you had?
because I’d been busy planning a birthday party for Whitley.
It was going to be small—just Colter, Ellison, my mom, Jake, Reid, Mikey, and Hayden and his girlfriend, Sierra—but I still wanted it to be special.
My little girl, the joy of my life, was turning four. Some days—most days, really—I couldn’t believe how much she was growing. Other days, I wanted to pull my hair out, because it was more like Whitley was three going on thirteen with the sass and attitude she gave me.
Yesterday, she’d looked me square in the face when it was time to go down for a nap and told me I looked like I needed to get more beauty sleep, so I should probably go take a nap, too.
I didn’t think I was this much of a diva as a kid. I’d be asking my mother later, but for now, I would blame it on Adam.
Luckily, she was spending the day with my mom, so I could get the finishing touches for the birthday party set up.
The cottage was a little small for ten people, but if we had to, we could take it outside.
It’d probably do her some good to run around in the grass with the rowdy cowboys.
For now, though, the living room was decorated in shades of pastel—sage green, baby blue, light pink, and butter yellow.
I was in the process of hanging a sparkly banner that read Happy Birthday above the fireplace, and I also bought a few balloons to put out front.
What I was most proud of, though, was the cake. I could have just gone to the grocery store and ordered one from the bakery, but I wanted to try my hand at making it myself. Whit loved everything sweet—she’d taken after me—but recently, she wanted all things chocolate.
To be fair, it was a box cake, but the frosting was homemade chocolate buttercream, and I’d filled the inside with a mixture of strawberry jam and vanilla buttercream.
The top was decorated with swirls of chocolate frosting and sliced strawberries.
Later on, we’d add some candles for her to blow out.
I put a lot of effort and love into her cake, so hopefully, she would love it as much as I did.
A knock at the front door pulled my attention away from decorating.
I glanced at the clock, internally panicking.
When I saw the time, my shoulders relaxed a bit.
It was only eleven, and the party wasn’t supposed to start until one.
However, a prickle of annoyance crept up my arms at the person disrupting my flow.
I climbed down my step ladder and poked my head around the corner, trying to catch a glimpse of whoever was at the door.
Butterflies erupted in my chest when I realized it was Jake, and I did my best to conceal my grin as I flung open the door.
“The party’s not for another two hours, you know,” I teased as a greeting.
He shrugged. “I thought I’d come by and see if you needed any help setting up.”
Cue more butterflies.
Adam never would have taken the time to help decorate his own daughter’s birthday party.
In fact, we’d never thrown Whitley a birthday party before for that reason.
Well, that and I didn’t really have any friends back in Washington who I’d want to invite to a birthday party for a toddler.
Sure, there was Tory, a friend I met at a book club, who had offered to ship me my things, but I honestly believed she was only doing that because she felt sorry for me.
“I’m just adding the finishing touches, but you’re more than welcome to hang out.” I stepped out of the doorway so he could come inside.
“It looks really nice in here, Cait,” he murmured as he took in our surroundings.
I hadn’t really done much with the place other than add the decorations for the party. If it were my house, there were some things I’d want to do to the interior, but it wasn’t my place. This living arrangement was temporary.
“Thanks, I did the best I could to make it the fairy princess party of her dreams.” I huffed out a laugh.
“She’s going to love it. You’re a good mom, you know that?”
I pulled my bottom lip between my teeth.
Was I?
This was the first party I’d thrown for her ever.
A better mom wouldn’t have waited until their daughter had turned four to have a big celebration, I thought before pushing the guilt away. Those were fighting words that my therapist would have scolded me for.
“Everyone has their own timelines. Just because you haven’t reached a milestone that other parents have, doesn’t mean you’re behind. Parenthood is such an individual journey. It’s not a one size fits all, Caitlin,” she would say.
Still, I couldn’t meet his gaze, instead choosing to change the subject as I walked into the kitchen. “Colter’s going to grill some burgers and hot dogs for the party. I was going to make some side dishes, too. Do you guys like macaroni salad and Italian pasta salad? I also got some fruit.”
“Have you seen us?” Jake laughed. “We’ll eat whatever you have available. Do you need me to run to the store to get anything? I don’t have anything going on.”
After opening the fridge, I tapped my lips with my finger, surveying what I had before turning my head toward him. “We’re probably going to need some drinks. Both kid-friendly and adult,” I added.
“Got it. Anything else?”
“Chips? I don’t know. I guess anything you think of that we might need. It’s only going to be ten of us, including Whit, though, so don’t go too crazy. I’m not exactly swimming in cash right now.”
He shook his head. “Don’t worry about paying me back. I’ve got it. Whatever you need, Cait, just let me know.”
When I spun around to tell him off, my face nearly smashed into his chest. He wasn’t that much taller than me, but he still had a good four inches or so.
“You don’t have to buy it, I—”
He pressed his index finger to my lips, and my mouth clamped shut. “I want to. Is your phone number still the same?”
“Y-yes? Why?” My brows furrowed.
“In case I need to text you while I’m at the grocery store. Here, I’ll send you a text right now so you have mine.” He pulled out his phone, typing for a minute before my phone buzzed on the counter.
406-555-0192
It’s Jake.
“Thanks.” I added his number back into my contacts.
There was a short time in college when we would text each other.
In the beginning, it was really only to talk about house parties and if I couldn’t reach my brother and needed something, but it had turned into a lot more.
He was the person I called when I was stressed about exams and Adam was being a dick.
That was probably why Adam made me delete the number of any guys that weren’t him, my dad, or my brothers.
And I was only able to keep my family after arguing about it for hours.
The daze I’d momentarily fell into faded when I realized Jake was looking at me like he was waiting for me to say something.
“I’ll let you know if I think of anything else I need.”
He offered me a quick nod then headed toward the door.
Before he could leave, I called out to him. “Jake!”
His brows raised as he glanced over his shoulder.
Everything I wanted to say—an apology for letting Adam get between our friendship, appreciation for being here and supporting me now, despite everything—got lodged in my throat, so I just took a deep breath and said, “Thank you.”
“Anytime, Cait. You need anything at all, just let me know.”
Whitley’s birthday party quickly got moved outside to the front lawn.
Ten people was definitely too many for the little guest house.
It worked out great, though, because the guys, minus Colter, who was cooking the burgers on Jake’s grill, were keeping Whitley busy while my mom, Ellison, Sierra, and I watched.
“It amazes me how much energy they all have,” Ellison sighed. “It makes me tired just watching them all run around like that.”
“That might just be the pregnancy talking,” I said with a laugh.
Whitley and the men—wearing paper crowns that Ellison and Sierra had made for the party—were currently engaged in an intense game of freeze tag.
Right as I looked up, Mikey slipped and fell on his ass, giving Whit the perfect opportunity to prance up to him and smack her hand on top of his head, yelling, “Freeze!”
I ate my words real fast. “Maybe not.”
“It’s good for them.” Sierra snorted, shaking her head as Hayden barely dodged Whitley’s hand. “Someone has to keep them young, right?”
“Hopefully, they’ll all take a nice long nap after this.” Mom added to the jokes with a yawn. “I haven’t even done anything, and I could use one.”
“You were watching Whitley this morning, though,” I pointed out. “How was she, by the way?”
“Oh, she’s just a little angel,” Mom gushed, stars practically shining in her eyes. I was starting to think that was her default answer.
“Funny how that changes the moment she comes home,” I grumbled, earning a laugh from the other women. “Did I have an attitude when I was a kid? Is she getting her sass from me?”
Mom wrapped her arm around my shoulder, giving it a light squeeze. “Your grandmother always told me you were a perfect angel, too, my dear.”
I rolled my eyes. So, that’s a yes.
“Burgers are done!” Colter spun around from his spot at the grill, his Smokin’ Hot Dad apron his friends bought him practically plastered against his T-shirt. “Hot dogs will be done soon, but come eat, y’all.”
“That’s our cue.” Mom got up from her lawn chair, offering Ellison a hand up as well. “I’m starving.”
“I think the little one is hungry, too.” Ellison rubbed her stomach when it growled in perfect timing.
The guys had run over to get in line with Whit, but Jake urged Ellison ahead of them, despite her protests.
“Go after Whitley, Ellie girl. We don’t need a hangry mama,” he added with a wink, earning himself an eyeroll and the middle finger.
“Birthday girl gets food first!” Colter handed Whitley a burger that was cut into perfectly sized quarters. I gave him a grateful look as I led her to the table with fruit kabobs shaped like wands and sides, adding small amounts of everything to her plate.
“Mommy, I don’t like macaroni salad. It’s ’gusting.” She pouted, glaring at her plate.
“You’ve never had it before, bug. How do you know you don’t like it?” I asked.
“I just know. It’s ’gusting. Bleh.”
“Ah, but macaroni salad is my favorite,” Jake’s voice rumbled behind us. “Can’t you try a little bit for your mom?” He made a show of taking a big bite of his salad and humming his approval, a sound that came out too much like a moan for my comfort.
“No.” Whitley wrinkled her nose.
“Didn’t you say you wanted to be big and tall like me, though?” He continued his attempts to sell the salad to my child.
Her eyes narrowed as though she was debating it in her head. “Hmph, fine.”
My eyes widened as Whit took a spoonful of the salad and shoved it in her mouth.
“It’s good, isn’t it?” Jake took another bite of his.
“It’s okay.”
Well, okay was better than ’gusting in my eyes, so I would consider it a win.
Thank you, I mouthed to Jake. Normally, it would have stung for her to listen to someone else and not me, but all I felt in this moment was gratitude and a little bit of relief.
Maybe asking for help wasn’t so bad.