Chapter 16
“How was the ball, Mama?” Theo asked as he finished his breakfast, butter and crumbs of toast smeared around his face.
Rosalind glanced at Bea, who gave her a subtle shrug.
She knew about the previous night, and she’d been just as curious and shocked at the situation.
But they had said they wouldn’t discuss it in front of Theo; he didn’t need to know that his mother was suffering from an insecurity.
He didn’t really understand it, not at his young age.
She fixed a smile at her son. “It was fine. I won’t do that on a regular basis, but I managed.”
Theo looked pleased. “I think you should do it again. I can’t, so you can do it for me.”
Rosalind couldn’t help but laugh at that. “There are many things you can get me to do, but there are limits.”
“But…”
“Finish your breakfast, Theo,” Bea said, leaning over to wipe the boy’s mouth with her napkin. “You’ve got your lessons to do this morning, and you’re never going to get them done today if you keep interrogating your mother.”
Theo pouted. “I don’t want to do my lessons.”
“Hard luck.” Bea stood. “Come on. The sooner you get it done, the sooner you can do whatever you want.”
Still muttering under his breath, Theo got down from his chair and followed his governess out of the room.
Rosalind watched him go, unable to stop smiling.
It was sweet seeing her son behave like this, even if it was irritating.
He could be very mature depending on the situation, and other times he was just as he was—a little boy who just wanted to play.
It wasn’t fair that he had to have the title at such a young age.
He should’ve been focused on other things, not preparing to take over a title when he came of age.
As it was, Rosalind was looking over everything and making sure it was in order.
She had a steward who helped, and Julian said he would be there to make sure things were fine as well, but it was all down to her eventually.
It was giving her a headache.
Although Rosalind had a feeling this was not because she was having to take on a tough role that she never anticipated happening.
It had something to do with the night before, when she and Cormac had left the ball.
She still remembered the beautiful fair-haired woman watching them leave, carrying a smile that suggested she knew something Rosalind didn’t.
She’d caught sight of her and Cormac as she left, and saw how the woman had stood close to him. It was clear there was a familiarity between them that Rosalind wasn’t privy to. She found she didn’t like it.
She had to stop it. Cormac was merely her neighbor and a friend. She shouldn’t be upset that another lady had taken an interest in him. Or had a previous interest in him.
That was none of her business.
“Morning, Rosalind.” Julian entered the room, yawning loudly as he scratched his head. “I don’t think I should’ve returned as late as I did, but the ball was so interesting that I couldn’t take myself away.”
“So I noticed,” Rosalind remarked. “My rooms are on the other side of the house, and I could hear you stumbling in making a noise.”
Julian winced, settling down into a chair across from him.
“Forgive me, my dear. I didn’t mean to wake you. Although I’m surprised that you left early. I was hoping to meet you at the ball and surprise you.”
“How did you know I was going to be there? I only agreed to go the day before.”
He smiled and tapped the side of his nose. “I have my ways. I thought it would be nice to reunite that way. And I’m pleased that you decided to make a move to meet your neighbors.”
Rosalind frowned. “I thought you said hiding away and keeping away from others would be good for me.”
“It is, but sometimes the isolation can get to you.” Julian selected a bread roll. “A gathering now and then isn’t going to hurt anyone. It was nice to know you’d made an impression.”
“An impression?”
“Ottoline overheard a few of the ladies at the ball last night. She said there were glowing comments about you. Apologies, Lady Ottoline, wife of Baron Carlisle. She’s a widow, and we’ve become acquainted recently. I thought she might be a good friend for you.”
Rosalind didn’t like the sound of that. She’d already made up her mind that she didn’t want to be closely associated with Lady Carlisle. If Cormac had misgivings about her, then she would do the same.
She peered at her husband’s brother as he had his breakfast laid in front of him, and he began to eat.
“What did Lady Carlisle say?” she asked.
“About what?”
“Lord Ravensmuir. She was watching us leave, and I suspected from the way they spoke to each other they were previously acquainted.”
Julian glanced up at her, his expression showing his hesitation.
Rosalind wished he wouldn’t look at her like that; it usually indicated that he knew the truth, and he would draw this out for dramatic effect.
It was one of the things she didn’t care for when it came to her brother-in-law.
It was as if he knew it was annoying and just kept doing it.
Julian buttered his bread roll as he spoke.
“You’re right, they were acquainted before. Although I think that would be an understatement.” He sighed. “They were each other’s great love.”
Rosalind blinked. “What?”
“They were madly in love for some time, and it was certain that they were going to be married and they would live together happily. But then she was given a marriage proposal to someone her parents approved of, and she couldn’t turn it down without disgracing her family. To say the earl didn’t take it well…”
He shrugged. “I think he still holds a candle for her. He was broken when she had to marry someone else. It was then he vanished to Ravensmuir and hid away from everyone.”
Rosalind let this sink in, horrified by what she’s heard. Cormac had been in love with Lady Carlisle? How had he not said anything to her? Was he ashamed of it? Or was he still in love with her?
Something curdled in her stomach, and she shifted in her seat.
“I presume it’s a tough situation,” she said through gritted teeth, trying to sound cool. “Seeing someone you loved married to someone else and in the same room.”
“She’s not married anymore.”
“What?”
Julian smiled, cutting into his sausages.
“She’s a widow now. Her husband died suddenly a few months ago. And she had a family estate not too far from here, so she thought she’d come back here and reacquaint herself with her childhood home.” He shrugged. “I think it’s good that she’s come back. It’s nostalgic, don’t you think?”
Rosalind didn’t know what to say to that. To her, it sounded like Lady Carlisle was coming back to renew her romance with Cormac. Rosalind knew it was none of her business, but she still had a nasty taste in her mouth that ruined the delicious taste of the food she’d just consumed.
“You can’t go on like this, Rosalind,” Julian said suddenly, sitting back in his chair.
“What do you mean?”
“Hiding on an estate with your child, no man to guide the estate. I know this was going to be temporary for you, but you can’t protect Theo out here.”
Rosalind was now confused. It felt like he’d whipped her sharply from one conversation to another. She picked up her coffee cup and took a sip, trying to get the nasty taste from her mouth.
“William wanted us to be here, and it seems to be doing us some good. Theo is more like his usual self, and we’re away from prying eyes.”
“But Theo shouldn’t be here permanently. Especially when he doesn’t have a father.”
“He has me. And I have people I trust to protect him if I can’t.”
Julian chuckled and held up a hand. “Forgive me for saying this, Rosalind, but he needs a man around. A man who can protect him, both physically and in name. It would secure his place in Society once he’s old enough to enter it, and it would certainly end your loneliness, don’t you think?”
“What are…?” Then Rosalind realized what he was saying. She stared at him in shock. “Are you suggesting that I get married again?”
“Not immediately. Just something to think about. It would make things a lot easier for you.” Julian sat up and began to eat again.
“And it would be better for Theo to have his schooling in England. At a proper school. He’s old enough to go to one, and I think he’s going to grow up not as educated as other children if he remains with Miss Lowe. ”
Rosalind stiffened. “Are you trying to tell me that I should dismiss Bea?”
“I’m not saying anything. I just think that he might do better at school instead…”
“No.”
The word was out before Rosalind could think about it. She lowered her cup and shook her head.
“No, I’m perfectly happy with what Theo has right now. Bea keeps him busy with his lessons, and he’s not behind on anything. He doesn’t need to be at school.”
Julian looked bewildered that she was even speaking against him. “You can’t seriously think that he can progress like this, can you? If he was under my own watch, and I got him into the school I went to—”
“It’s a no for me, Julian.” Rosalind stood up. “I won’t allow it. Theo is staying with me. You may not like it, but that’s my decision. Now, if you’ll excuse me?”
She hurried to the door, her heart pounding as she entered the hall. She stopped, pressing a hand to her chest and taking a deep breath. Julian might have meant well, but he didn’t need to tell her what to do when it came to her son.
Also, something flickered across her thoughts, going back to the moment when she refused to send Theo away to school.
Julian had looked rather surprised that she’d even refused him.
And then something had shifted. His expression had gone cold for just the briefest of moments, his eyes narrowed in frustration and, she was sure, a bit of anger.
But it was gone before she really could pay attention. And it was leaving her shivering.
“Rosalind!” Bea was coming back down the stairs, looking a little red-faced. Theo was jumping down the stairs behind her. “I apologize, but Theo and I need to go into the village.”