Chapter 36 #3
She smiled faintly, but his words had unsettled her. Her power surpassed Dravic’s? She had not considered that. How powerful was she? And what would that mean for the king?
Dravic had enemies. Scotara had enemies. Men had already hunted for the healer who could defy death without knowing who she was. What would happen once it became known that the healer was also Scotara’s queen?
Would every man who wanted power come for her? Would every kingdom that feared what she could do turn against Dravic? Would his enemies use her against him?
And yet, upon hearing she was the healer he searched for, Dravic had paid no heed to the startling news. To him, she was simply Adira.
Dravic caught her chin. “You are doing far too much thinking. What your parents think, what anyone thinks, makes no difference.”
She frowned.
“I know that look.”
Her frown deepened.
He smiled. “Aye, that one as well.”
Adira couldn’t help but smile.
“There. That is better.” He brushed his lips across hers. “Nothing matters tonight except us. Only us.”
Tonight.
The word struck painfully at her heart.
Adira reached up and touched his face, letting her fingers follow the familiar line of his jaw.
How many times had she looked at this face when he had not known she was watching?
How many times had he spoken to her knowing she could not hear him, refusing to treat her as though she were less because she could not answer?
She had once feared him. Somehow, without her realizing when it happened, that fear had become trust. Trust had become longing and longing had become love.
Dravic kissed her again softly and without haste.
She would miss this. The thought came so unexpectedly that she nearly pulled away. Instead, she pressed firmly against him.
Dravic’s arms immediately tightened around her.
She would miss this as well, being held like he never wanted to let her go, his warmth, and the safety she always found in his arms. The moments when there was no king and no kingdom, no healer or magic. Only Dravic and Adira.
She closed her eyes, rested her head on his chest, and held him tighter after the kiss ended.
His hand moved slowly over her hair. “You are trembling.”
She shook her head against him.
“Do not tell me nay when I can feel it.”
Adira lifted her face.
Dravic studied her for a moment. “Tell me what troubles you.”
She almost laughed at the impossibility of it. For the moment, she was grateful she had no voice. If she could speak, she feared she might tell him everything. And if she did, he would never let her go.
Instead, she kissed him.
Dravic hesitated only an instant before returning the kiss.
Adira wrapped her arms around his neck, wanting him closer. Wanting to forget everything she had learned today. Wanting only him.
Dravic swept her into his arms, and her startled smile made him grin.
“There is that smile again.”
She touched his cheek.
His expression softened. “I love you.”
Adira’s smile faded beneath the weight of those three words. She touched her hand to her heart and then pressed it to his.
“And you love me,” he said as he carried her to the bed.
For a while there were no questions waiting to be answered, no truths to understand, no kingdom demanding anything of either of them.
There was only the love they shared.
Much later, Adira lay curled against Dravic, his arm heavy around her waist and his breathing lighter in sleep.
She had not slept. She didn’t want to. She wanted to remember: the warmth of his body beside hers, the feel of his arm around her, and the way he always reached for her in sleep as though even then he needed to know she was there.
She would miss that most of all.
Nay. That wasn’t true. She would miss everything.
Their time beside the hearth. The way he ordered her about and then looked annoyed when she ignored him.
The rare smiles he had shared with her. The way he had spoken to her when she could not hear a single word.
The way he had never once made her feel that silence made her less.
Her eyes burned and she pressed her lips together and fought the tears.
She loved him with her whole heart, with every part of her being. That was what made this so difficult. If she did not love him, leaving would be easy.
But she loved him enough to know she could not become his queen while she did not even know who she was. And now there was something else she had never considered.
Power.
Her father believed she possessed more power than the King of Scotara. What did that mean for Dravic, his crown, his kingdom… for them?
She had spent her entire life having others decide what was best for her. Her mother had decided silence would protect her. Her father had given her mother the magic to make it possible.
Now everyone told her she was the healer who could defy death. Dravic told her she would be his queen. They all loved her. She knew that now. But love did not answer the question that would not leave her.
Who was Adira?
She looked at Dravic sleeping beside her and her heart broke a little more.
She needed to find the answer herself.
And she knew that if she stayed until morning, she never would.