The Seas Between Us

Chapter Twenty-Three

I called out of work. Anne Marie wasn’t surprised, but she did demand that we have dinner tonight because she wanted all of the details about Merrow. We hadn’t decided how many details to give her. It would be a moot point if Merrow moved too much and the scales were seen though. They were getting harder and harder to miss.

I loved looking at them. More and more patches of them popped up this morning, and she was distraught when she woke up. I gave her one of my long sleeve shirts, but the patch on her calf would be difficult to hide, so I drew a mermaid on her leg to camouflage it.

“I don’t want this to ever wash off,” she said. I twisted the tail to hug the curves of her leg, extenuating the beauty of her body. Maybe I should be a tattoo artist one day–

The thought was cut short when I realized that there would be no one day because there were only three days left. Forever. Three days.

“If we hurry, we can arrive before all of the sisters are busy in the cafe. They don’t like to leave it unattended, and we need to talk to all of them. I’m sure Serita knows something. ”

“Let’s go then.”

Merrow and I walked hand in hand down the boardwalk. It was peaceful, comfortable. And ending, very soon. When we passed Beans and Barley, Anne Marie saw us through the window and came running out.

“Merrow, I have to thank you, because I’ve seriously been trying to get Owen to play hookie for years . You’re a good influence on him.” Anne Marie winked at her and Merrow practically shrank away.

“Oh, I hope he isn’t in trouble–” she started before Anne Marie waved the concern away.

“No way, he needs this. There’s more to life than art and coffee,” Anne Marie said. “Wow, actually that sounds sorta horrible.” I laughed and promised her that we would meet her for dinner.

Once we were out of earshot, Merrow asked, “Will she tell anyone? If we tell her the truth?”

“She wouldn’t if we asked her not to,” I said. And I knew that was true. Anne Marie was a true friend, and likely the only real friend I had. If I was going to die, I wanted to at least know that someone would miss me, as selfish as that was.

“If you trust her, then so do I.” She squeezed my hand, and I felt myself letting go of the panic that had risen in my chest. We were almost at the cafe, when Merrow abruptly stopped.

“Merrow?”

“Listen to me, Owen. Even if we can’t find anything, you don’t need to worry when this week is over. Nothing is going to happen to you. Nothing. I won’t… I won’t do it, and the tribe will just have to find another way.”

There was such fight in her eyes, a fire I’d never seen before, so I stayed quiet. She didn’t want my assurances that it would be okay, that I’d do whatever she needed, because she asked nothing from me. Not with this. Not with my life .

“Let’s see what the sisters have to say,” I said after a beat. The cafe was within view now, and I saw the green-haired one at the window, staring at us. She was strikingly beautiful and beautifully sad. Tia looked as if heartbreak could take human form.

The other two–Adara and Serita–joined her at the window and our time to linger was gone.

Merrow held her head high, chin up as we entered the cafe like she was actually about to go into a battle with her tribe mates. I stayed silent. Somehow, I didn’t think any of them, especially Serita, would be thrilled to know that I knew they were mermaids. The cafe was empty, and Adara quickly flipped the sign to closed - be back soon! and pulled the shades down, cutting off all of the natural light in the dining area. Merrow and I were in the middle of the cafe, waiting for them to speak. The desserts they had been working on were still on their prep counter, and Tia’s hands were covered in frosting and cream. The three of them scooted closer together with Serita in the middle. A dare to come closer, to try something.

“You came back,” Serita said without a trace of humor. Her pretty face was a mask of ice. She’d make an excellent painting; all three of them would, together. I could see it forming in my mind’s eye; Sorrow, Rage, and Fear. Adara’s lovely, wide eyes would be so easy to paint, adding flecks of light to show how terrified of life she was. I wondered what her motivation for staying on land had been. Merrow told me they stayed with Tia, but the bond between the three of them must be as unshakable as the ocean itself for them to give up everything to stay here.

Would Merrow do that for me? The desperate, loneliest parts of me whispered.

“Please,” was all Merrow said, as if that explained everything. The three of them didn’t move, but I saw how Adara’s hands twitched, and how she wanted to comfort Merrow. There was such sorrow in the flick of her wrist, like she was so used to everything slipping through her grasp.

“What do you want to do, Merrow?” Tia asked carefully. She stepped around Serita, who glared at us. There was frosting on her cheek, like she had scratched it and didn’t realize it transferred.

“How did you stay on land?” I asked, and they all turned to me in one motion. I swallowed hard, suddenly feeling a lot like a bug they’d enjoy stepping on.

“We just didn’t return,” Serita said, as if it was that simple.

“But how–”

“You know nothing about us, Owen Harper. You don’t know our histories or our power. And here you are, demanding we tell you our secrets?” Serita hissed. I didn’t back down, I didn’t cower, even though I wanted to. My life was simple before Merrow walked into that exhibition, but there was no going back to that point. Life has been divided into before-Merrow and after-Merrow now.

“Stop it,” Merrow spat back. “Tell me how to avoid this. You did it for Tia. She stayed on land. She didn’t kill her chosen one. Tell me how to do this.”

“It took a sacrifice,” Tia said and I felt her heart breaking again.

“What kind of sacrifice?” Merrow asked. She hadn’t let go of my hand, like it would be letting go of any hope we had left.

“A terrible one,” Adara answered. We turned to look at her. “There’s no use in hiding this story, Serita. I’m sure she’s heard it before. Our people need magic to stay in the mermaid forms. You know this. But if there’s fewer mermaids, it requires less magic–”

“So we all gave our magic away,” Serita cut in. Her words cut right through me. They gave up their magic, their fins, their lives in the oceans for Tia.

“I loved him,” Tia said, “But the sacrifice wasn’t just our fins. Our lives are much longer than a standard human’s life. So I got to be with him, but not for long. Not forever. He grew old, and died. I never did. We never did. Now we’re here in the human world to stay. We can’t ever go back to the water, because we gave it up.”

“Is that what you want, Merrow? To give up your fins?” Adara asked.

No one moved. No one breathed. Merrow’s eyes were full of tears when she looked at me, a silent request for forgiveness. “No,” she finally, quietly said.

The word punched through me, ricocheting around my ribs, until I felt like throwing up. Of course she wouldn’t stay here, not for me, not for whatever this was–

“I don’t want to leave my family,” she said, “but I don’t want to leave him, either. Please, sisters, tell me what to do.” The tears fell and I hugged her nonetheless. She didn’t deserve this. I didn’t deserve this.

“So there’s no way?” I said. The finality of it was starting to kick in. Three more days. That was it. My whole life was coming to a close in three more days.

“We didn’t say that,” Serita said.

“We never found her. There’s a mermaid somewhere that grants the wishes of your heart, the deepest desires. You get one wish, and only if she agrees to help you,” Adara said.

“We looked. All three of us. We split up and searched every corner of the ocean we could reach, but she wasn’t there. It’s probably just a myth.” Tia said.

My pulse thundered through me. There was hope, a tiny sliver of hope. “Could we wish for the mermaid's magic to come back?” I asked.

“You could wish for anything, but no one has ever found her. She’s just a story, probably made up to ease our minds about the tasks laid before us,” Serita said.

“How did you make your sacrifice? Someone had to take the magic from you?” Merrow asked .

“The Pearls. They took every ounce of our magic. They didn’t even take us to the surface so we could breathe. They just took the magic, drained it from our veins, and left us to drown,” Serita said flatly.

“But you’re here to help other mermaids–”

“Because no one else will if we don’t,” Tia said. Silence clung to every molecule of air. It was thick and heavy and engulfing. The sisters could barely stand to look at us with even Serita staring straight through us instead of at us. The cafe felt so cold from the iciness that came from her.

“Then help me,” Merrow pleaded. “Help me find this wish-granter. Help me save all of us.” She seemed so small to me then. Merrow’s skin was clammy, and I gently tugged the long sleeve shirt off of her shoulders. There was no need to hide the scales here. My fingers brushed over the patch on her shoulder, and I noticed another small, faintly blue scale forming right at her shoulder blade.

They stayed quiet, no one wanting to speak. “Does the heart of the seas mean anything to you?” I asked, and all at once the sisters were locked onto me, like I had grown another head. I didn’t flinch away, but instead pulled Merrow closer to me. With her back pressed against my chest, the hug was a steadying force for both of us. Mainly me.

“How do you know about her?” Tia asked.

“Her? The heart of the seas?”

“Yes,” Adara breathed out, “That’s who you need to find. She can grant the wish.”

The silence was terrible. I’d always been comfortable in silence–welcomed it, really–but this was awful. This was oppressive and crushing. This was the silence of resignation and it made my knees weak.

“I think I’ve met her before,” Merrow said, turning to look at me. That hope was back; her blue eyes sparkled in the low light, and she turned to look back at her. Merrow danced from foot to foot, energy practically sparking off of her. She fiddled with the edges of her hair, then the scales on her wrist, and back to her hair.

“How?” Tia demanded, coming to life like she hadn’t before.

“I think I met her, right before the ritual. She was hurt, and I helped her. I’d never seen a mermaid like her before; it was like she was made of gold.” Twisting and twisting the braid, she spoke faster and faster.

“What was her name?” Serita asked, her voice grave and deep.

“Anahita,” Merrow proclaimed. The name charged the air in the room. The hair on my arms stood up and a chill shot through me and down my spine like a bullet. The sisters didn’t dare breathe, none of us did. Merrow scanned each of our faces, looking for the confirmation that she needed. We all felt the room change. Even me.

“I have to go back to the ocean,” she declared, and the sisters still said nothing.

“How?” I asked, my heart already breaking.

“We can help you,” Tia said. Serita’s glare was enough to freeze the warmest of hearts, but she didn’t even acknowledge her. When Merrow touched my arm, I realized that I hadn’t been breathing either, and I sucked in a huge breath. The noise was so loud that I was embarrassed. All at once, the cafe seemed to come back into focus–the soft blueish walls and the white tables with shells all over them. The strong scent of salt from the ocean, and the smell of sugar from all the candies and pastries.

“How?” Merrow asked, the steel in her voice surprising me. She was fierce, I’d realized then; not just the sweet, magical woman that I’d gotten to know, but a warrior beneath the surface. She’d called the mermaids predators once, but I hadn’t understood what she meant then. I did now.

“With these,” Adara said, sweeping across the room to unlock a china hutch. It was lined with mismatched plates, all with oceanscapes and ships and mermaids on them. The collection was odd but fitted the cafe–just like the random pieces in my own home. I hadn’t taken a moment to really drink it in, and I still couldn’t because Adara was using another, smaller key to open a hidden door. Merrow yanked on my arm hard enough to nearly drag me across the room.

“Are those stones of air?” she asked. The grip on my hand tightened so much I almost winced.

“Yes, before we lost all of our magic, we created a horde of them. I was a skilled artisan before I left the seas. I made them for us so we could return one day, even for just a little while, but–”

“They don’t work on us,” Serita said. “The taking of our magic was too complete. We will never return to the seas, even though the sea still calls for us.”

“What do you mean?” I asked, and Tia rolled up her sleeve to the elbow, where a patch of green scales appeared.

“The ocean wants us, but we have no magic left to give. These little scales popped up when Merrow came to shore.”

“Will you change back to a mermaid?” Merrow asked, taking Tia’s arms to inspect the scales. The green was as neon and intense as her hair, and I tried to picture what she would look like in her true form.

“No, sweet child, we won’t,” Adara said, patting Merrow’s cheek like she was comforting a child.

I cleared my throat and held out a hand for Adara to pass one of them to me. It was on a small, thin chain and looked like a polished pearl. My hand shook as she held it up, letting me take a look before she gently set it down. The stone was heavier than it looked; I thought it would be light, but it had to be nearly a pound, maybe more. The delicate chain seemed too fragile to hold its weight.

“They allow the wearer to breathe in the water for one day. Moonrise to moonrise. If you stay in the water past that, you’ll return to your normal selves. Human self, for you Merrow. You’ll get your fins back at the end of the ritual. ”

“How many of these do you have? They seem so precious–”

“Not many, and they are. But this is a worthy cause. And like Serita said, we cannot use them. There hasn’t been a mermaid on land in so long, I don’t know who else would ever even need them,” Adara replied. Her voice was less fearful sounding now, and it reminded me of Tia. So much sorrow, so much loss.

“Will it… will it turn me into a mermaid? A merman?”

“Yes, it will. You’ll get to see Merrow’s home, our home, in a way humans could only dream of.” They watched me for a minute, waiting for a reaction. I had to be in shock. The morning had shifted to afternoon. Merrow held the stone in her hand, looking at it over and over. Time moved in slow motion–I knew that only seconds had passed, but it felt like hours. I was going with her to the sea. Shifting my weight back and forth, I wondered what it would be like to be weightless in the water.

“So once Owen gets fins… will he be able to understand the merfolk too?” she asked.

“I’m not sure. We’ve never used them on a human before, but it should be a complete transformation like your transition to the human world.” Tia added. The sisters were back together, huddled so close it was like they were one person. Thunder cracked overhead, and the sudden storm made me flinch.

“How does it work? What do we need to do?”

“You have to wait until moonrise, and then you go to the ocean. Wear the stone around your neck and do not take it off. Keep wading into the water until the magic transforms you.”

“Will it hurt? Will we feel it?” I asked, thinking about how my body would be breaking apart to reform into something totally new, totally foreign. I surveyed the women around me, and realized that this was not a first for any of them .

“It didn’t hurt exactly, but at first I didn’t know how to move. How to walk. How to get my legs to be legs instead of fins. It was difficult,” Merrow said, playing with her loose braid. The more she tugged on it, the more it came loose. My hands moved on their own, reaching for her to tuck it behind her ears.

“And breathing? Was that hard?”

“No, but it felt strange too. I got used to it fairly quickly.” I watched the rise and fall of her chest, remembering how she looked when she was struggling for breath last night, but not because her lungs were filled with water. Would the water crush me?

My lungs were going to fill with water.

The weight of the stone still in my hand felt so much heavier now, like it was trying to drag me down, drag me to the water.

“We should go tonight,” Merrow said.

“Tonight?” Serita cut in before I could say anything. The storm raged outside. It came on so quickly, so ferociously that it felt like it was trying to dissuade us too. I walked to the window, looking out at the sky. It was nearly black but still early afternoon.

“Storms are much different on land,” she murmured, looking at the angry, heavy clouds. They were so full of rain that I already knew the streets were going to flood.

“Go, before you are trapped here,” Tia said.

“But I have more questions–”

“The storm is too ragged tonight. Owen does not know how to swim through those waters. The storm will pass. Tomorrow night you will go to the seas,” Serita said, more gently than she had ever spoken to us. There was something so beautifully broken in her eyes, the storm that surged toward the shore but broke apart before its wrath could be felt.

“But– ”

“Merrow, one night will not make the difference. Stay, child. Don’t drag your human into these rough waters. That’s not the version of our world to show him.” Serita took Merrow’s hands, and all of the rage that I saw in her had drained out. Serita’s face softened and without the seething, terrifying rage, she was absolutely stunning. It had to be the remnants of the magic, but her beauty was something that couldn’t be fully appreciated unless you truly stared at her, taking in every line and highlight of that ageless face.

“What should we do for the rest of the day then? Hmm? We don’t have time,” Merrow scowled. Her voice almost broke on the last of her words, but I didn’t move to comfort her. I was the source of all of this anguish, and it would just be over if I just agreed and went with her, for this ritual. To die.

“Why did you tell me?” I asked faintly, and her head snapped up to look at me. “You could have just not said anything, used the magic, and helped your people.” She told me she didn’t want to kill, she didn’t want to hurt anyone, but I wanted to hear it was because maybe she loved me too. Was that selfish?

“I–”

“This is a conversation for you to have later. In private, while the storm rages on. You’re welcome to stay here, or you can hurry back to your home, Owen. Make the choice soon, because the rain is coming,” Serita said. She nodded to her sisters, and the three of them left the room, heading for the stairs to the upper part of their home. The cafe would stay closed today; no one would venture out in this either.

Lightning raced across the sky, and two heartbeats later, the thunder filled the air.

“Let’s go to my place. Anne Marie will meet us there in a couple of hours.”

“Will she go out in this storm? ”

“I don’t think even a hurricane would stop her when she made her mind up. And tonight, she’s determined to get to know you better,” I said with a nervous smile. Anne Marie could be a lot–she was an intense person, vibrant and lively, and while she was fun, it was a lot when all that energy and focus was directly solely at you.

“Are we going to order food?” Merrow asked, finally smiling, the softness and color coming back to her cheeks.

“Pizza, probably. It’s Anne Marie’s favorite.”

“Let me get some clothes from upstairs, and then we can go home.”

Merrow didn’t notice that she said home, like it was something that belonged to both of us. She said it so casually, so easily that the weight of those words must not have registered for her. Home. She saw my apartment as a place she could call home. My chest tightened as she wandered up the stairs to collect her things.

I stayed rooted to the floor. The last couple of hours were finally hitting me, the reality of the days ahead and how final they were rammed into every part of me. I was winded and shaking. Not being able to stop myself, I pulled out my phone and sent a quick text to Anne Marie.

I have so much to tell you tonight.

I’ll bring some wine then too. She texted back and I smiled. Getting drunk sounded like a great plan.

Merrow had a backpack with her when she came back down, and I offered to carry it for her. She reluctantly handed me the bag, but only so Merrow could tuck herself closer to me, leaning into my side. The scent of juniper followed her everywhere, and I breathed it in. Would she smell like that in the ocean?

“Anne Marie is bringing some wine tonight,” I said, and Merrow narrowed her eyes. The confusion made her nose crinkle, and my insides were warm because of it.

“What’s wine?”

“You’ll see.”