Chapter Seventeen #3
Stepping back outside, the cold air stings my lungs.
I suck in a deep breath, jaw tightening, teeth cracking slightly.
The broken, forgotten camera lies in ruin on the porch.
Good. Fuck you, you little bitch. Sensing my approach, Charlie immediately sits up and whines.
“Come on, big guy, want to meet Juni?” He steps down out of the truck and starts to trot up the stairs, heading to the front door like he’s been here a thousand times.
He sits and waits for me to open the loose front door.
When Juni sees him in the doorway, she gasps with surprise.
He immediately goes to her, laying his huge ass head on her lap.
Her fingers start rubbing behind his ears.
“Well, who knew you’d be this handsome?” she says to him in a baby voice.
Charlie whines again, trying to bury his head deeper into her lap.
Satisfied, I go on my way to the kitchen.
Not bothering to turn on the light, the window light was enough.
The fridge is making a horrible noise. But it is working okay.
Opening the freezer, I start my search and find a bag of frozen peas and carrots.
Searching the other drawers, I see a clean dish towel and wrap it around the frozen bag.
“This should do it, okay?” I say, gently guiding my impromptu ice pack to the left side of her face.
She slightly flinches but continues to press it carefully over the swelling.
It’s quiet in here...almost too calm. The only sound is Charlie’s breathing.
“Can you be honest with me, Juni?” I ask, my voice low. “This wasn’t the first time, was it?”
She stares at the frozen bag in her hand for a second too long.
“It happened once before. I broke his baby’s first Christmas ornament the same night I broke my wrist. He backhanded me for it.
This last time, he walked in through the door.
That was the most pissed I’ve ever seen him.
When he got home, he immediately noticed my car and all the work that had been done, even though he knew we didn’t have that kind of money.
He started accusing me of cheating on him.
Kept calling me a whore and saying I must’ve been fucking the mechanic to get all that free work. ”
Mechanic… that’s obviously me. He did this to her because of me. I mean, I wish I could have her under me. But she’s not mine to please anymore. Scoffing a little, I said, “Obviously, you haven’t been. You wouldn’t still be living here,” I say, looking at her knowingly.
She looks up at me, picking up the words I don't need to speak out loud. “He doesn’t care, he believes what he believes.”
I sink on the couch, elbows on my knees, hands running down my face. “Juni… he’s not going to stop..,” I say, hating the truth of it. “You are aware of that, right?”
“It won't happen again. Because…,” she says, voice barely audible. “He hit me because of you. And honestly, it was my fault reaching out to someone who wasn’t my husband… regardless of the trouble I was in.”
Shocked a little bit by her response, I jerk my head back slightly.
Well, fuck that hurt. But I remind myself she’s deflecting.
I know this. “You reached out to me because deep down you knew I’d come to you, Juni.
” My eyes held hers. ”Before it gets any worse, let me help you get out of here…
safely,” I pause. “I’ll make sure this never happens again… ”
“Gavin.” Her angry voice cut me off. wincing, squeezing her eyes shut like my offer actually hurt her. “I can’t...”
“Why?” I ask angrily. “Huh? Why not? Because you think your love will change him?”
My words make her flinch as if I’ve struck her. “Because… he’s all I have, and everything I own is in this trailer,” she says in a small voice. “Because he will turn this town upside down looking for me, he owns me, and he will hurt you to get me back. ”
Does she really think he would make me run? “Let him try, Juni. Let him try to take you away from me.”
“You can say that all you want, Gavin, but you don’t understand… You don’t understand how he gets when he’s not sober.”
My control snapping, my anger brewing. I shoot up off the couch and get down onto my knees in front of her.
Carefully, I cradle the side of her face that isn’t pressed with ice, my thumb brushing her temple.
“Look at me,” I demand. She does. Eyes wet.
Her good eye was showing so many emotions at once.
“I don’t care what you think, he won't be able to get to me, Juni.
I would risk my life if that meant saving you.
You keep asking me not to leave you, but you're also pushing me away at the same time.”
“I’m not your problem to save, Gavin,” she says with a plea.
“I fix problems for a living, Juni, I do it because I love it, and I followed my dreams because you told me to,” I murmur, a small, humorless smile tugging at my mouth.
“Engines. Transmissions. Bent frames. Doesn’t mean I won’t fix this, too.
Even if it’s just holding ice packs and making bad jokes. ”
Her fingers twitch. She lets out a shaky exhale. “Gavin.. I just can’t, and I am so sorry for pulling you into this… can you please leave?"
“Как скажешь, моя любовь,” ‘As you say, my love.’ I say under my breath.
I stand up, grab Charlie’s leash, and start heading to the door.
I stand there for a few seconds, time keeps passing by…
and she doesn’t beg me to stay. So I don’t.
Charlie and I go out the front door. Shutting the door on Juni once again.