Chapter 9 Memory Lane #2
My shoulders tensed as my gaze drifted to his neck, to the white scars peeking out from beneath his cloak. Fury spread through my veins but, as I glanced at his gorgeous face, I was yet again left to wonder why they never scarred his face.
“However, there is one thing I still can’t figure out.” He scanned my eyes, searching for the answer to a question that was about to change everything. “Why didn’t you leave me to die like my family did?”
I sucked in a sharp breath.
I always knew my bodyguard would ask me this question one day, but I never wanted to face the reality of why I actually saved him.
Perhaps, it was all the liquor sloshing around in my stomach or the newfound emotions plaguing my mind, but I decided to answer him truthfully for the fourth time today.
“When I saw you in that small, dilapidated home, tied up, with rivers of blood streaming down your chest, your back, your arms . . .” I shook the memory from my mind, trying to steady my rapid breathing from the anger brewing in my core.
Staring deep into Landon’s eyes, I allowed myself to share a part of me I locked away from the rest of the world. “When I saw you all alone, I thought of how I prayed every night as a mortal for someone to save me from the hell that was my life.”
He moved closer, bracing his hand against my thigh. His warmth seeped into my skin, and I glanced down to see my body trembling.
When did I start shaking?
Softly, I dragged a finger over my bodyguard’s hand.
“Seeing you like that . . . I killed hundreds of people before meeting you and was never affected by their battered bodies, but when I saw yours—” Slowly, I dragged my eyes to meet Landon’s gaze.
Silver lined his eyes, and, a moment later, a tear broke free to stream down his face.
As I continued, I swiped it away. “Maybe I saved you because I wished someone did the same for me all those years ago. I know I should regret it, but I don’t. Saving you is one of the only good things I’ve done since becoming the Serpent Queen.”
His eyes crinkled as his lips tugged into a pained smile, tears freely flowing out of my bodyguard.
I didn’t think it was possible for his eyes to burn an even more vibrant blue, but between the tears pooling in them and the stars reflecting off the glassy surface, I marveled at how gorgeous Landon was.
Not only was he beautiful to look at, but he had one of the purest souls I’d ever come across. He could be strong when I needed him, but he also felt so deeply.
He reminded me of who I once was.
The girl I hated to think about today.
Warmth flooded across my cheeks, prompting Landon to caress my face. When he pulled his hand away, he stared at the tears coating his fingertips in awe. He glanced between the tears and myself with a stricken expression. I touched my face, my suspicions confirmed as wetness kissed my fingers.
For Serpent’s Sake, I was crying again.
With a groan, I flopped onto my back, covering my face with my hands.
“What is happening to me?” I muffled while straining to swallow my emotions.
Ever so tenderly, Landon grasped my hands, tearing them off my face.
He leaned over me, dropping his face so close I was sure he was going to kiss me.
But instead of his lips crashing into mine, they gently pressed against my tears, savoring each one as if they were the only water left in the desert around us.
I let out a shaky breath at the extremely intimate gesture, but somehow, with each feather soft press of his lips against my flushed skin, I relaxed into the sand.
I should push him away. I should stop him from scaling the wall I’d built between us for all these years, but my resolve crumbled each time he savored my tears like they were something to not be ashamed of.
Like it was okay to feel.
Slowly, his lips trailed lower, hovering over mine, but he hesitated.
We didn’t share moments like this. If we kissed right now, truly kissed, we would be crossing a line that would be nearly impossible to come back from.
I was about to shove him away when the smell of a fresh rainstorm poured down my throat. Although Landon always had a cloud of sadness lingering around him, this felt different. It was like a wild storm—destructive and deadly.
I convinced myself what I did next was because I couldn’t stand to choke on his misery for another moment, not because I needed it as badly as he did.
My lips wrapped around his as I tugged him against me, fusing our bodies into one. I dug my fingers into the soft velvet of his coat while his lips moved against mine. Our kisses were soft at first, until they turned wild, almost like my lips were the only antidote to his perpetual sorrow.
I rolled him onto his back, never letting our lips stray as I straddled my bodyguard. His fingers dug into my thighs while we devoured each other for what felt like hours.
Our bodies worked in harmony, moving as one in an endless dance of despair.
I loosened his belt, allowing Landon to free himself as I raised my gown and slipped onto his hardness. My head lolled back with pleasure, allowing me to marvel at the beauty of the desert, at the stars shining above as I grinded against him.
However, my brows tugged together when I saw a golden glimmer in the sky blaze brighter.
It was as if the star was winking down at us, at the queen without a soul and the man with a fractured one.