Chapter 10
Tyler Warren
No matter how hard my dick was, I refused to touch Violetta in a sexual manner tonight, not after her confession at the swing earlier.
Ever since, I had been unable to look at her the same.
Before, there was still a trace of that sweet, innocent young girl I’d fallen in love with.
She had a hardness about her now, a depth of life’s experience I would, thankfully, never know.
This new view didn’t lessen my love for her, it made it stronger.
I appreciated her more than ever, that she had gone through the pits of hell, lived there, somehow managed to raise two beautiful babies, and pulled herself out while still maintaining a sense of compassion and hope, still wanting to love and be loved.
She was fucking remarkable and for the umpteenth time since meeting her, I thanked whatever god decided to gift me her heart.
Her back against my chest, we were lying on our sides, slightly perched against the headboard.
My arms around her, my left hand was twined with hers, my thumb stroking her knuckles.
The right underneath her and crossed over her chest to tenderly pet her bare bicep, my lips were pressed against her scalp as music crooned from the television set on an oldies channel.
As Bryan Adams sang Everything I Do, I Do It For You, my brain whirled at everything the both of us had been through because of a certain Edoardo Jackson “Jackyl” Bianchi.
The man bulldozed our lives and ruined everything.
Sure, I set the ball rolling when I cheated on her, but that had been a one time situation, I was not a habitual cheater, as he used to drill into her head.
Our love had been strong enough to overcome that discretion.
In time, we would have found our way back to one another and continued with our life goals.
She would have joined me at college in Kentucky, she would have become a lawyer, and I would have gone to the NBA.
I might still be a ball player today, or I might have already retired and found my way to the music industry.
The point was, we would never know, thanks to that sick bastard.
I was also now seeing, even had I not made that one mistake, Jackyl would have found other ways to get rid of me.
That thought had me shuddering to my core.
In his view, I had been an obstacle to his prize, something to be eliminated, no matter what.
At least, with how things went down, I was still alive.
Had things been different, he might have had Dash and his goons kill me, not maim.
“I felt that,” she whispered.
“Hm?”
“You got all tense all of a sudden. You okay?”
I snorted and rotated my head so I could talk without her hair. “I should be asking you that. You always think about everyone before yourself.”
“I don’t know about that. I think choosing to follow my heart over my children’s safety was kind of selfish. I felt that, too.”
My insides cringed and then I chuckled. “Baby, you three were not safe with him, haven’t you learned that, yet?”
She heaved a sigh and snuggled closer. “My mind says yes, but my heart is still in denial.”
It seriously irritated the hell out of me that she could still be so blind, but I had never been brainwashed before. I’d never been groomed by a predator. I had no idea what was going on inside her mind so all I could do was be patient and try to be as understanding as possible.
“Oh, my god, I can’t believe Vinny heard me today.” She dipped her chin over my forearm to rub her eyes. “I never wanted him to know.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know,” she whined.
“Is it because you were afraid of him hating Jackyl even more, because, honestly.” I snorted and shook my head. “I really don’t think that’s possible.”
“Tyler,” she whined, tensing up herself. “I really don’t want to talk about this.”
I huffed, reminding myself she was a victim.
She was only sixteen years old, alone, frightened, and vulnerable when he started digging his way into her psyche.
There was a good chance a piece of her would never be able to fully accept what happened.
Would that truly be so bad? What was the harm in letting her partially stay in denial?
She was in love with me, knew her place was with me.
If keeping on those rose colored glasses helped her cope with her traumas, then why take them away? Whatever it took to help keep her sane.
Choosing to change the subject, I tightened my embrace and pulled her even closer, my cheek against hers. “Did you see that weird moment with Vinny and Dash earlier?”
“Yeah, what was that about? They had a weird moment in the kitchen the other day, too, remember?”
“Yup.”
“I’ve never seen that with them. You think they’re torn because of why we’re here?”
Afraid she was about to start taking all the blame again, I hurried to move the conversation along. “You wanna hear what I think?”
“Of course, always.”
I tingled everywhere, my heart swelling to capacity. Even when we were kids, she had never been too busy to make time for me. It was one of the reasons I’d fallen head over heels so damn quick into our friendship.
“Okay, so you gotta keep an open mind, got it?”
She giggled, absently picking at my hangnails created from constantly strumming my guitar. Normally I was pretty good at keeping up my manicure, but since being here, I’d slacked off a bit.
“Just tell me, silly.”
Lifting my head to whisper against her ear, I said, “I think he’s gay.”
She gasped and shoved away to flip over, facing me. The only light coming from the television, shadows were cast across her face, but she was certainly gawking. “Shut up.”
I snickered, scratching the side of my head. “I’m serious.”
“Why would you think that?”
“Well, I lived with my uncle for about two years. I was surrounded by all his gay friends, some of which were not open outside their circle. There was this one guy, in particular. He…” I started to get a little anxious at this part of my story but dismissed it when I recalled that afternoon in the garage of the abandoned house. Violetta would not judge me.
“Baby?” she cupped my cheek, her thumb stroking side to side.
“Okay, remember when you asked me if I’d ever been with a man?”
A slow, shallow gasp pulled through her lips. “Ty-Ty, have—”
“No, no. Honest. I’ve never lied to you, Letta. You know that. I wouldn’t start over something trivial like that.”
“Oh,” she stated, sounding almost disappointed. “Then what?”
“Well,” I said, dragging the word out. “He was new to owning his feelings and he misjudged something I said during one of John’s parties and he hit on me.”
She wiggled closer, the television’s light showing her face enough to see a mischief smile. “Oh, really? What happened?”
“He kissed me.”
“Mm. Interesting. And?”
“And, that’s it.”
“Did you kiss him back?”
My shoulder rolled, one side of my face scrunching. “I mean, yeah. I was curious to see if I liked it.”
“Did you?”
I heaved a sigh, my knuckles caressing her cheek. “He wasn’t you.”
Her smile fell and she pouted. Taking my hand, she pressed a kiss to the palm before hugging it to her chest.
“Anyway, after I politely told him I was not interested, he started low key freaking out. I calmed him down and we started talking. Some of the things Vinny does reminds me of Alex.”
“Like what?”
“Like…Well, ain’t no one closer to him than you.”
“Right.”
“When was the last time you saw him with a girlfriend?”
She froze, her jaw falling.
“For that matter, when’s the last time you even heard him talk about a girl?”
“Oh…shit.”
“He’s always got little jokes here and there about people’s relationships. Alex said he did it to deflect so no one would question him about his lack of dating.”
She rolled slightly away to cover her forehead and blink at the ceiling. “Holy shit,” she continued to whisper. “I never even noticed.”
“Exactly. Alex said he had become a pro at living his life so no one even thought about him dating. The kicker here?” I tucked a finger under her chin and tugged so she was looking at me. Lowering my voice even further, I stated, “I think he’s got the hots for Dash.”
She jostled so severely, the mattress shook, a palm slapping to my pec. “Shut up!” she cried in a normal voice.
I chuckled and pulled her closer, groaning at how goddamn wonderful it felt to have her in my arms again. I had begun to think this day would never come.
“Holy shit,” she muttered, back to whispering. “At the swing, they had a moment when Vinny was freaking out.”
“Yup. I’m telling you, there’s something there. You okay with that?”
She snorted and shrugged. “Of course, I am. In my eyes, they’re both my brothers. I just want what’s best for them both and for them to be happy.”
Cupping the back of her head, I drew her nearer and began showering her face with tiny kisses, the love I had for this woman overflowing.
“So,” she purred, her nails dragging up and down the dip of my spine. She arched her throat, her leg draping over mine. “What else happened between you and Alex?”
“Nothing,” I muttered between kisses.
“Really? Nothing?”
Pausing, my eyelids opened, my pulse skipping a beat. Slowly sitting up, I stared into her eyes shadowed by the darkness. “Why does it sound like you’re upset?”
Grinning, her knee inched upward, carefully rubbing against my balls. “I don’t know. It’s kind of hot thinking about you with another man.”
I did a doubletake and craned my neck away to see her whole face better. “Are you saying you want me to have sex with a man?”
“Absolutely not. I do not share, I think I’ve made that clear.”
Though I knew she was teasing, the pang of guilt still twisted my gut. Not wanting to dwell on it, however, I asked, “Then what are you talking about?”
“I want you all to myself, Tyler Warren,” she purred, nuzzling closer, her breasts pressing into my chest. “But it makes me wet thinking about you with a man. It would have really been hot had you fucked me while telling me every sordid detail of riding a cock and cumming all over him.”
Lust scorched through my blood, making me rock hard instantly. “Jesus,” I croaked, suddenly breathless.
“Mm, seems like you like the sound of that, too,” she purred, tucking her hand between us to cup my bulge.
“Letta…”
Pushing me to my back, she straddled my waist and leaned into her palms on my chest. Her thick hair cascading over a shoulder, she wiggled her bottom to grind over my cock.
An inch away from my face, her warm pants tickling, she whispered, “Tell me who you’d fuck, Tyler.
Any man in the world, who would it be? Tell me, and tell me exactly what you’d want to do to him. ”
Growling from deep in my chest, I fisted her hair and yanked her down, crushing my lips to hers, our hands pawing at one another. So much for not getting sexual tonight. Violetta was about to get brutally fucked senseless.