7. Nolani #4
I shook my head.
The man was ridiculous.
Fine.
But ridiculous.
I changed into one of his black T-shirts and drawstring shorts that required serious negotiation with my waist. The shirt fell halfway down my thighs and smelled faintly of his detergent. When I stepped back into the living room, Landon was setting candles around the room.
He looked up.
Stopped.
I leaned against the doorway. “Problem?”
He set the candle down. “That shirt had a different reputation before tonight.”
“It’s still respectable.”
“Not on you.”
“You blaming me for the moral decline of cotton?”
“I’m watching it happen.”
“You should’ve offered safer clothing.”
“The drawer may have been strategically stocked.”
“I knew it.”
Landon came toward me and settled his hands at my waist. “You comfortable?”
“Yes.”
“Good.”
That was it. No third interrogation. No speech about changing my mind. He kissed my forehead and went to change.
When he returned in gray sweats and a white T-shirt, barefoot with his locs hanging loose, the cabin suddenly felt much smaller.
He dimmed the lights, lit the candles, and we ate on the rug in front of the sofa while rain covered the windows and thunder moved farther over the lake.
Landon cracked crab legs and kept dropping the best pieces onto my plate without interrupting our conversation.
“You know I can do that.”
“I know.”
“Then why are you?”
“’Cause I want to.”
I looked at him.
He looked back.
No philosophy attached.
I ate the crab.
That man was learning.
Or maybe I was.
Conversation moved easily between us. Books.
Football. My shop. Lennox’s absolute commitment to drinking inappropriate beverages from stemware.
Landon told me his mother had hidden the last quarter of her butter pecan behind frozen vegetables because nobody in the house willingly looked there.
When dinner disappeared, he cleared the containers and returned with two slices of dark chocolate cheesecake.
I looked at mine. “Bribe?”
“I don’t buy truth. I believe it deserves dessert.”
“That sounded rehearsed.”
“It sounded brilliant.”
“You ordered dinner before I agreed to spend the night.”
“I was hopeful.”
“Confident.”
“Hopeful.”
“You knew I was coming.”
“I knew what I wanted.”
The distinction stayed with me.
He sat beside me again, thigh against mine, one arm stretched along the sofa. I ate a bite of cheesecake and caught him staring.
“You staring.”
“I know.”
“Most people deny it.”
“I’m not most people.”
“That degree damaged your humility.”
“I came like this.”
I laughed. Chocolate must have stayed near my mouth because Landon reached over and caught it with his thumb, then put his thumb in his own mouth.
I stared.
He smiled.
“You have your own cheesecake.”
“Mine wasn’t on your mouth.”
“You’re committed to making dessert inappropriate.”
“Hershey, you sitting in my cabin, wearing my shirt, with your legs out. Cheesecake ain’t responsible for where my mind went.”
I looked down at the shirt. “Your clothing damaged your judgment.”
“My judgment excellent.”
“Your restraint?”
“Under review.”
I laughed again, then the moment settled around us. Rain moved softly against the windows. Landon finished his cheesecake. I finished mine. My hand drifted toward the pendant and stopped.
His eyes caught the movement.
He didn’t ask.
That was what made me speak.
“What do you want to know?”
Landon set his plate aside. “Whatever you want me to.”
“That’s evasive.”
“That’s respectful.”
“You don’t have questions?”
“Plenty.” He turned toward me. “But I’m not prying you open because I’m curious, Hershey. Tell me what you want me to know.”
My fingers closed around the pendant as I looked at him. “I’m good at being needed. I know how to help. I know what needs fixing before most people ask. I know when Nyla needs me to step in and when she needs me to stay out of her way. I know how to make myself useful.”
Landon said nothing, so I continued.
“I’m not always as good at letting somebody see me when I’m tired. Or when I don’t know what to do. Sometimes, being dependable becomes the easiest version of me to offer people because, if I’m useful, I understand my place.”
His hand covered mine without moving it from the pendant.
I took a breath. “And letting somebody care about me when I haven’t done anything to earn it still feels strange.”
That was enough. I didn’t need to explain every scar beneath the sentence. Landon understood it.
His fingers tightened gently around mine. “Thank you for telling me.”
I looked at him. “That’s it?”
“You want a lecture?”
“No.”
“Good. ’Cause you already know how I feel about you.
” Something in my chest eased. Then Landon looked down at our hands.
“I understand more than you think. When Mama got sick, and Daddy lost his job, I started handling shit because somebody had to. Bills. Groceries. Lennox. Whatever came next. Nobody asked me to become everybody’s answer.
I just had the salary and enough shoulders for folks to assume the weight fit. ”
I leaned closer.
“I didn’t resent it. Still don’t. Those my people. But after a while, you get used to being valuable because you solve something.” His eyes came back to mine. “Sometimes, I wondered whether people wanted me or what came with me. The security.”
“Yeah.”
“Resource with locs.”
A laugh escaped me before I could stop it. “That was terrible.”
“Accurate, though.”
“It was dramatic.”
“I’m still fine.”
“Painfully.”
His head lifted. “Say that again.”
“Absolutely not.”
“You said it freely the first time.”
“I was emotionally compromised.”
“So vulnerability improved your eyesight?”
“This is why I don’t compliment you.” He smiled. I lifted his hand and kissed his knuckles, then looked at him. “I see you, Landon.”
That smile disappeared.
“I see the man who feeds everybody and forgets his own plate. The coach who corrects a child without humiliating him. The son who refills his mama’s water before she asks.
” His fingers tightened around mine as I brought his hand against my chest. “And I don’t want you because you can solve something for me.
I want you because you don’t make me feel like something that needs solving. ”
For once, Landon Brooks had nothing clever ready. His eyes stayed on mine before his hand came to my waist.
“Come here, Hershey.”
“I’m already beside you.”
“You know what I mean.”
I did.
I moved onto his lap and settled across his thighs, my knees resting on either side of him. His hands circled my waist while my fingers found his locs. For a second, neither of us spoke.
Then his expression changed. “Been wanting to ask you something.”
“Did the seafood negotiations not satisfy your curiosity?”
“This ain’t about food.” Something in his voice straightened my spine. Landon’s hands moved slowly along my sides. “Since Willow Run, I haven’t wanted room for anybody else. I don’t want to keep treating this like casual dating when I already know it ain’t casual to me.”
“Landon…”
“I want your good days. Your busy Saturdays. Your smart-ass mouth. The days you need space, and the ones you want somebody close enough to notice before you ask.” His thumbs stroked my waist. “I want you to be my woman, Nolani.”
Everything inside me stopped.
He watched my face without smiling or joking. Just Landon.
“I’m asking clearly because I know what I want.”
I touched his jaw. “That was a very elaborate way to ask me to be your girlfriend.”
“That word too small.”
My lips curved. “Oh, is it?”
“Yeah. Girlfriend sound like I’m asking to sit with you at lunch. I said I want you to be my woman.”
“Major distinction?”
“Very.”
“And what does that make you?”
“Your man.” He looked entirely too pleased with himself again. “I thought a woman with your education would follow the analysis.”
I laughed. “You’ve been waiting to say that.”
“I’ve been waiting for you to be ready to hear it.”
That took the humor right out of me.
“Yes.”
Landon went still. “Yes?”
“Yes, Landon.” I slid my fingers behind his neck. “I’m your woman.”
His expression changed slowly. Warmth first. Then satisfaction. Then that swagger I had come to recognize as fundamentally incurable.
“Good.”
“That’s all I get?”
“Nah, baby.” His hand slid higher along my back. “That’s what you get before I kiss my woman.”
His mouth touched mine softly, then deeper. I kissed him back with both hands in his locs and every uncertainty I had brought into the cabin finally somewhere else. When he drew back, his nose brushed mine.
“Say it again.”
“I’m your woman.”
His thumb moved across my cheek. “Yeah, baby. You are.”
I smiled, then kissed my man.
The second time felt different. Not because a label had magically transformed anything, but because neither of us was pretending this was headed somewhere unnamed anymore. Landon’s mouth traveled beneath my jaw, and my head tipped back.
“That smart mouth getting quiet?”
“It’s considering its options.”
“Tell it I’m patient.”
“You’ve complained about this shirt for an hour.”
“Complaining ain’t removing it.” His fingertips slipped beneath the hem and rested against my waist. Then stopped. His eyes lifted. “You still want this?”
I touched his face. “Yes.”
“Hershey.”
“I want you, Landon.”
His eyes closed for one brief second. When they opened again, hunger lived there with something more tender.
“You got me, love.”
I kissed him before he could ruin me with another sentence.
Landon stood with me in his arms. I gasped and locked my legs around his waist.
“You could’ve warned me.”
“You said you wanted me. I’m improving delivery time.”
“That degree ruined you.”
“Nah.” His mouth touched my neck as he carried me toward the bedroom. “You just meeting the practical application.”
“Insufferable.”
“You like it.”
Unfortunately.
The bedroom waited in dim light from the hall and the occasional flicker of lightning beyond the windows. Landon lowered me onto the bed and stood between my knees.
I reached for him. “You staring.”
“I know.”
“Shameless.”
“Especially now.” I caught the hem of his shirt and pulled him closer. He looked down at me. “Because you’re mine.”