Chapter 45
forty-five
INDIGO
So much for getting some writing done.
“Are you going to tell Bash?” Lola frowns as I pour myself another cup of coffee.
Am I? Yes, for sure. But I’m not sure if I should tell him today. I make eye contact with Megan. “I’m not sure I should say anything before game two of the finals. Of course, I’m going to tell him, but I don’t want to be the reason he loses his focus, you know?”
Megan nods. “So much of the game is mental. Especially for a goalie. Unless you think this guy is an immediate threat to him or you, I don’t think waiting could hurt.”
“That’s my thought process too.” Sighing, I slump on the couch.
“I don’t want him to think I’m hiding anything, but telling him today versus tomorrow won’t change anything.
It’s not like I’m interested in giving Ryland any more of my time.
There’s nothing he could say or do to change my mind or make me give him another chance.
I don’t even know why he showed up here. ”
That’s the most frustrating part. What does he think he has to gain?
“He’s such a fucking weasel,” Lola growls. “He saw you were out here making headlines, dating a successful man, and kicking ass as an author, and he wants to leech off your success.”
That could be true, but how does he think he’s going to do that? I’m not in LA. I don’t have any new connections there. Unless he’s trying to find an in with a hockey organization or a romance-focused literary agent, there’s nothing I can offer him.
Not that I’d help him with either of those things, either.
“It doesn’t really matter what his goal was, because I’m not doing shit for him.” Sucking in a deep breath, I work to center myself and slow my racing pulse. Ryland isn’t worth my anxiety. “So we agree it’s okay to wait until after the game to talk to Sebastian?”
Lola and Megan both nod, and the knot in my stomach loosens at least a little.
“Good. Okay. Then I need to try getting some writing in today, so it’s not a total bust.” Pushing away from the table, I give Lola and Megan hugs. “Thanks. I’m glad you were both here.”
The guys managed to get Megan a ticket to the game tonight, so she’ll be there too. I’m glad for the extra company and pair of eyes. Not that Ryland has any hope of getting a ticket. Still, his appearance has anxiety twisting my stomach, and I hate that I don’t know what to expect from him.
“Forget that little rat,” Lola says when I hug her. “You’ve moved on to bigger and better things, and you better not let him derail you.”
“I won’t,” I promise her.
And I mean it.
The game is not going the way we all hoped.
After getting their asses kicked in game one, Florida came out swinging tonight, and they haven’t given Bash a moment to breathe.
“Come on, babe,” I murmur under my breath as their center takes another shot on the goal.
Bash stops it, but they’re crowding him, and as soon as he deflects it, their wingers battle our d-men for possession of the puck.
My shoulders hurt from carrying so much tension and hunching over to watch the game with my arms on my knees, my neck craned so I don’t miss a thing.
Florida takes another shot, and I hold my breath. “You’ve got this,” I tell my boyfriend.
And he does. But as soon as he stops the second attempt, they make a third, and this time, it makes it through. The puck barely clears his glove in all the chaos around his net, and the crowd erupts in boos as the light flashes to indicate a visitor goal.
“Dammit,” I hiss, hating the way Bash’s head hangs in defeat. “Shake it off, babe. You’ll get the next one.”
It’s the end of the second period, and they’re tied two to two with the Sharks.
The game isn’t over, but I know he must be beating himself up.
Sebastian carries the weight of the Rogues’ losses on his shoulders, despite the fact that hockey is a team sport.
When they win, it’s because the team played well.
When they lose, in his mind, it’s because he didn’t play well enough.
The minutes tick down and the period ends without either team scoring again, and I text Bash as the ice crew takes over and resurfaces the ice in preparation for the final period. He won’t see it, because he tries to limit potential distractions during games, but he’ll read it when the game’s over.
Me
I’m so proud of you. This is a tough game, but you’re kicking ass and I’m rooting for you. No matter what happens, you’re my MVP.
“Ugh. Brutal.” Isla shakes her head, red curls bouncing around her head. “I know you can’t win them all, but it would be really nice if they did. This game is giving me heartburn.”
“Same,” Mira says, wrapping her arm around her sister-in-law and giving Isla a side hug. “But whatever happens, it’s only game two. Nothing is decided tonight.”
“We all knew they weren’t going to sweep the series.” Megan shrugs, her arm around Lola in their seats. “It’s the finals. These are the best two teams in their league. Of course, it’s going to be a battle.”
I’m glad I didn’t tell Bash about Ryland.
If the game is this intense? I would have been so mad at myself for breaking his focus in any way.
Will it hurt his focus going into game three?
The next two games are away games, and they’ll be hoping to win both so they can clinch the series at home in game five.
This will require some thought.
“You okay?” Blair leans around her little brother, Reed, and levels me with a concerned look. “You’ve been kind of quiet tonight.”
“I’m fine. Really. Just had a weird experience today.” I sigh, trying to calm my racing thoughts. Screw Ryland for showing up like that. Today should have been all about Bash and the game. It should have been a fun time with Lola and the women in this room who are becoming my friends.
Instead, my mind is on the guy I dated for a year because he seemed perfect on paper and I’d resigned myself to the fact that I’d never end up with the man I truly wanted. The man probably stressing out in the locker room.
Blair gives me an understanding smile. “Want to talk about it? I know a little something about weird experiences.”
“She does,” her brother Reed interjects. “Like having psycho stalkers pull a knife on you and then burning your apartment down.”
“Luckily, my experience wasn’t that weird. Just…” Sighing, I decide it can’t hurt to let them in on it. I’ll simply ask them to keep it quiet from their guys so I can talk to Bash about it myself on my own time. “My ex showed up on our doorstep today.”
It’s like a record scratches, and suddenly all eyes are on me.
Lexi frowns. “Are you okay? Need us to take him out?”
Obviously she’s joking, but part of me almost believes her offer is genuine, and for some reason, it allows me to take my first full breath of the night. “No, he’s my dad’s personal assistant, so that would be inconvenient for him.”
Lola barks out a laugh. “Your dad would deal. Does he have any idea that his little errand boy showed up today? I know he and Vivian thought the sun shone out of Ryland’s ass, but you are Robert’s daughter. I doubt he’d be pleased.”
“I have no idea. He must realize Ryland’s out of town, but does he know Ry’s here?
Your guess is as good as mine.” I’m not sure it’s worth saying anything to my dad.
Not only because I can’t imagine Ryland being masochistic enough to stick around after I shot him down, but because my dad loves Ryland.
He was genuinely sad when we broke up. “It doesn’t matter, though. I’m sure he’s long gone by now.”
“That little bitch better have run with his tail between his legs,” Lola says. She catches Reed looking at her and smirking, and she winces. “Sorry. I forgot there were kids in the room.”
“I’m thirteen,” Reed says. “And he does sound like a little bitch.”
“Reed.” Blair pinches the bridge of her nose, but she’s fighting a smile, so she can’t actually be mad.
“What?” The teenager shrugs. “Showing up at your ex’s house without consent isn’t cool.”
“True that, Reedster.” Lexi extends her fist for him to bump, which he does with a grin.
“Well, we’re here for you,” Isla says decisively. “And all the guys are too.”
“And my team doesn’t drop gloves as often as the men do, but we know how to throw down. I could rally the troops.” Megan’s attention is on me when she makes the offer, so she doesn’t notice the way Lola looks up at her with ooey-gooey heart eyes, but I do.
My best friend is falling hard.
“Thanks, everyone. I really appreciate that.”
The lights in the arena change as the ice crew finishes resurfacing the ice and both teams skate back on. Pushing Ryland from my mind, I watch my boyfriend as he scuffs up the crease with his skates, getting everything just the way he likes.
Even from here, I can see that he’s locked in and focused.
“Come on, guys. You can do this.”