40. Cole
Riley’s eyessearch mine as if she’s trying to filter through the emotions in them to find the truth beneath. I’m not even sure I know how to figure out my own emotions right now.
Maybe I don’t want to feel. Maybe I want to escape.
Getting lost in her beautiful gaze seems like a good start.
Part of me is numb. Part of me wants to scream or throw something in frustration and sorrow for what I never had, what could have been, what I’ve lost. For my father never being who I needed him to be.
Part of me wants to close my eyes and pass out. It is late, and the combination of finding out my estranged father is dead and the whiskey flowing through my veins has me feeling like there’s something buzzing beneath my skin.
Riley’s eyes burn into mine, caramel flecks glinting in her irises in the low lamplight of the living room.
She’s the first to lean in, and I find myself drawn toward her like a magnet. I hear a rush of breath leaving her lungs just before her lips press against mine.
The thunderstorm of thoughts inside my head starts to clear as our mouths meet.
She’s tentative at first, as if she’s trying to figure out how badly I want this, how far to take it, how much pressure to put into the kiss.
I close my eyes and lose myself in the moment, allowing her tongue to slide into my mouth and dance with mine.
She lets out a soft moan and leans into me as our kisses become more fevered, more rushes of breath against skin, more nipping of teeth.
My hand trails down her back, caressing her curves as I groan softly. Right now, it feels like the only thing I need in the entire damn world is this.
As if she can sense that, her own hands start to wander. They roam down my chest gently, almost tentatively, before she finally brushes her fingertips over my cock through my pants.
I couldn’t suppress a groan of approval if I tried, and it seems to encourage her. Her touch becomes more intentional as she rubs her hand over me, teasing me. My cock strains in response, pressing against my boxers with an ache I’m suddenly desperate to abate.
“Cole.” Riley breaks our kiss for a moment, biting her lower lip. “Is this okay? I don’t want to make you feel like you have to—”
“It’s okay.” I palm the back of her head, crushing my lips to hers again. “It’s more than okay. Fuck, don’t stop.”
She smiles softly, a hint of sadness and empathy in her eyes. But she does just what I begged her to do, kissing me again as she squeezes my cock. I roll my hips against her, grinding into her touch as I thread my fingers through her hair.
When Riley pulls away again several minutes later, her lips are swollen and flushed, and she looks fucking gorgeous. She slides off the couch, her eyes trained on me the entire time as she settles between my legs, pushing my thighs apart with her hands.
The expression on her face is so soft and tender that it makes my chest ache.
She’s taking care of me, and even though I would’ve denied I needed to be taken care of if anyone had asked, I really fucking do. My head and heart are a mess, and I feel like her touch is the only thing holding me together.
As she unlatches my button, pulls down the zipper, and links her fingers over the waistband of my pants, I nod to her to keep going. I shift my weight a little, allowing her to drag my pants down enough to free my cock. Her fingertips graze over my thighs, and I shudder.
Every nerve ending in my body is pulsing, desperate, craving her hands to touch everywhere possible.
She pauses as her palm cuffs around the base of my cock.
“Are you sure? The rules…”
I let out a slow breath as she trails off. I know what she’s asking. The rules we made are yet again being tested, pushed past the boundaries we set in place to keep from diving in too deep.
But I can’t resist her, especially not right now.
Is it really so terrible if she wants to comfort me? And is it really a big deal if she wants to show it in a way that brings us both pleasure and connects us on a more intimate level?
I glance over my shoulder. If Archie were to wake up and stumble into the living room looking for us, we’d have time to stop before he realized anything was amiss, thanks to the angle of the couch.
I glance back at Riley.
Her large brown eyes are gazing at me expectantly.
Before I can convince myself that this is a bad idea, that I’m hurting and not in any position to make a rational decision, I nod.
“Fuck it,” I murmur. “I don’t care about the rules. Do you?”
In answer, Riley gets to work immediately, as if she’s afraid I’ll have second thoughts and ask her to stop.
But there’s not a chance in hell that I will.
The fact that she’s the only thing I need right now scares the shit out of me, but I try not to focus on that in this moment. I’ll figure out what to do with it later.
Right now, I can only focus on the way she’s touching me and how perfect it is.
She’s so damn beautiful that as she strokes her fingers up and down the length of me, I think I might lose my mind. Her head dips between my legs, and I close my eyes and try not to groan too loudly when her soft lips wrap around the tip of my cock.
My hands sink into her hair, and I squeeze the strands, trying not to push her head down—because I don’t want to hurt her, don’t want to force her to take too much of me at once.
I want her to do it her own way, the way she’s comfortable, at her own pace.
But fuck, it feels so good. I have to control the heavy thud of my heart and the demanding ache in my cock. My body wants to take charge as I lose myself in the pleasure, in the way her mouth glides up and down my shaft.
“Riley…”
Her name trails off in a whisper from my lips, and I clamp my hand around the back of her head. But instead of pushing her deeper between my legs, I lift her head.
My cock pops free from her mouth, and she looks up at me with wide eyes as I shake my head, unable to form words for what I’m feeling.
“What’s wrong?” Her eyebrows furrow just the slightest bit.
“I can’t… I don’t want to hurt you.”
Her expression clears, and she runs her palms over my thighs. “You won’t.”
I clench my jaw. “I’m fucked up in the head right now, angel. I don’t have the same control I normally do. I know I’m a lot to take, and I can’t promise I’ll be gentle tonight.”
Her breath hitches slightly at my words, her pupils dilating. But she shakes her head. “You don’t have to be gentle. I’ll tap out if it’s too much, but I want to do this. I want to help you feel better.”
I swallow hard as I study her, my gaze trailing over every inch of her face. Her cheeks are slightly flushed, and her mouth is a little redder from taking my length one inch at a time, trying to devour it to make me feel good.
“You always make me feel better,” I tell her, raw honesty in my voice.
The flush on her cheeks deepens. “Good. Then let me do this. I can take more of you.” Her gaze flicks to my strained cock. “All of you.”
The way she looks at me sends a rush of heat through me, along with something else I can’t quite name.
I finally allow my muscles to relax, and I sink into the couch cushions, widening my legs so Riley can situate herself between them on her knees, her hand at the bottom of my pulsing cock.
Her mouth slowly closes around the top again. She starts to slide her lips down, inching slowly along my shaft, and I hiss out a breath.
“Fuck, that’s good. Keep going.”
Her tongue starts grazing, tracing circles across my skin. She is mapping out the veins in my shaft and gliding over them with the edges of her teeth and the tip of her tongue.
My heart is like a caged animal in my chest, my blood racing through my veins. My head spins a little, and I groan softly, not bothering to hold back anymore. The pleasure is too raw, too sensual, too overpowering.
My thighs start to shake as pleasure flows like a current inside me. I lean my head back, my breaths growing fast and ragged.
“Goddamn,” I grunt softly. “Take it all, angel. Fucking do it. So good.”
I want to edge myself. I don’t want to come yet, but I don’t know how much longer I can hang on to this sensation before it ruptures inside me.
Riley tilts her head at an angle, gazing up at me through her thick lashes as we make eye contact. My hand is clamped to the back of her head. The look she’s giving me while her mouth is wrapped around my cock, the tip pressing against the back of her throat, is too much to bear.
I tangle my fingers through her soft hair as I buck my hips upward, fucking her mouth hard and fast before spilling down her throat.
Riley swallows over and over again as I stiffen and shudder. A wild groan escapes my lips, followed by a panting sigh.
My jaw clenches as Riley sucks and wraps her lips around me, tight and contracting, her tongue stroking my skin. She swallows every last bit of my cum, but even after drawing the final spurt from me, she doesn’t pull away. She doesn’t stop.
She keeps sucking and swallowing around me, pushing the pleasure to a point where it edges on pain, drawing out my orgasm in a way that has me gritting my teeth as my balls tighten.
“Jesus fuck,” I bite out, my thigh muscles tensing. “You’re such a greedy girl. Fuck. Fuck!”
My cock gives one more weak pulse, and then I fall back against the couch, a shaking, panting mess.
Riley pulls away a moment later, both of her hands planted on my thighs for support as she lifts herself to sit next to me on the couch again.
“Was that okay?” she whispers.
I stare—no—gawk at this incredible woman.
How the fuck did I get so lucky to have her in my life? She licks her lips, giving me a shy and gentle smile even as my cum still glints on her lips.
“Fuck, Riley. Yes.”
I pull her toward me in answer, and our lips crash together. I groan at the taste of myself in her mouth, on her tongue.
Fuck the rules.
They don’t matter tonight.
Maybe they’ll never matter again. I don’t care.
My hand slides between her legs, and she moans quietly and arches her back. Her cheeks are pink, her pupils blown wide with desire.
I tug her onto my lap as we kiss as if our lives depend on it, and my fingers brush her inner thighs.
“I want to make you come,” I murmur against her neck as I pepper it with kisses.
“You don’t have to,” she whispers, even as she tilts her head to give me more access.
I chuckle roughly. “When has that ever stopped me? I don’t think you understand how much it turns me on to get you off.”
Riley whimpers, her teeth sinking into her bottom lip. She crosses her arms to lift her shirt over her head, and I help her yank it off.
I can’t wait a second longer to hear her moan for me. My hand between her legs slips inside her pants, my fingertips grazing her bare skin, burning to feel her soft, warm flesh. I part her pussy lips and sink my fingers into the perfect wetness of her core as she shivers in response.
“Pants off,” I whisper raggedly, reduced to two-word sentences, and she nods.
Quickly, she clambers off my lap, and even though I have to fight not to reach out and pull her back immediately, I’m drawn in by the sight of her as she shoves off her pants. Then she climbs back on top of me, fully bare, her legs straddling my thighs.
I pause to look at her, inch by beautiful inch, taking in the perfect pinkness of her nipples as I graze my thumbs over them. I study the dip of her waist, the flatness of her stomach, the way her breasts rise and fall with each breath.
She squirms on my lap, and my hands start to move again, traveling down her stomach, trailing across her thighs, parting the sensitive flesh between her legs.
“Cole…”
My name is a breathless whisper, a plea on her lips.
“I’ve got you,” I breathe. “I’ll take care of you, just like you took care of me.”
My thumb presses against her clit, and I relish in the way she gasps, her mouth falling open slightly as I trace slow circles around the little bud. She makes a soft noise and arches her back, her thighs shaking.
“That’s it,” I coax. “Good girl. Moan for me. Tell me how good it feels.”
“Oh my…” She trails off again, her chest rising and falling faster now. “You have no idea… how good it feels.”
“Do you want more?” I don’t look away from her for a second. “Do you want me to make you come?”
“Please,” she urges. Her voice is desperate, and my cock throbs all over again at the sound of her pleading like this. “I need to come.”
“How badly do you want it?”
“So badly. Fuck, Cole, you wreck me.”
Something proud and possessive rises in my chest as I watch her respond to my ministrations. I slide one finger inside her, making an appreciative noise at how warm and slick she is. When I add a second finger, Riley starts to writhe on top of me. Her palms dig into my shoulders as she grinds her pussy on my hand.
Her ass shakes slightly as she bounces a little on my lap, riding my fingers. All the soft moans and sighs she’s making are driving me crazy in the best way.
“You’re so wet, angel,” I rasp. “I can hear it.”
Her cheeks flame at the reminder of the quiet, filthy sounds that fill the air around us, but she doesn’t stop moving.
“Right there,” she whispers. “Against my clit.”
“You close?”
“Uh huh.” She nods, her gaze finding mine.
“Then get yourself off. Use me, angel. Ride my hand the way you like. Take everything you need.”
She lets out a soft sobbing sound, working her hips harder as she drops her head to kiss me greedily. I kiss her back, feeling the tension as it builds and then breaks in her body.
She stiffens against me, her inner walls fluttering around my fingers as I curl them to work her g-spot.
“You have to be quiet,” I remind her gently between kisses. “Try not to scream.”
She obeys, crushing her lips against mine to muffle the moans, but I can tell it’s a struggle for her not to be loud at the peak of her climax.
A gush of wetness slicks my fingers as she trembles on top of me, rolling her hips over and over as desperation finally ebbs away to sated satisfaction.
Finally, our kiss breaks. She leans back a little, and I drag my fingers out of her, offering them to her for her to clean them up. She obliges, wrapping her lips around both fingers as her tongue slides over them.
“Good girl,” I murmur approvingly.
She smiles as I slip my fingers out of her mouth. She’s breathing hard as if she’s just ran a mile, a sheen of sweat on her skin making the tiny, loose strands of hair stick to the back of her neck.
She’s glowing.
Impossibly, agonizingly gorgeous.
I stroke her cheek with my thumb, and we sit there, her in my lap, our eyes locked, for what feels like forever.
“How do you feel?” she finally asks, her voice low.
“Better than I have any right to,” I tell her, wrapping my arms around her to pull her closer. “Because of you.”
Her eyes warm, her fingers threading gently through my hair. “Good.”
She kisses me again, deep and unhurried, and I inhale her scent as I stroke her hair.
She’s becoming more of a fixture in my life, in Archie’s life, and I don’t know how I’ll ever let her go.