Chapter 10 #2
Raking my fingers through my tangled hair, I try to channel my yoga teacher. What does she always say? Breathe in the calm and breathe out the relaxation? By the time I realize it isn’t working, I’ve practically hyperventilated myself. I let out a forceful grunt through my gritted teeth.
My stomach grumbles, reminding me that I haven’t eaten yet.
Food and coffee will soften the blow of the worst morning ever, right?
Or at least make me full and jittery. I toss a couple more spoonfuls of ground coffee than usual into the coffee maker, and press the brew button before turning my attention to the refrigerator.
When I pull it open, what I see makes my blood boil.
My chicken salad sandwich sits wrapped in its clear, plastic film half-eaten, huge bite marks marring the edges of the sourdough.
He ate my lunch. He came into my home, threatened me, scared me, and ate my goddamn lunch.
After chugging down a larger than normal mug of coffee and wolfing down a bowl of cereal, I drive to the local hardware store for new locks. I feel like an idiot having drawn the line at a sandwich, but I’ll be damned if this nutcase is going to make himself at home in my house.
* * *
In the early evening, just as the sun is beginning to set behind the tree line, Deputy James Becker knocks on my door.
My eyes go wide at the sight of him. In high school, James was tall, lanky, and unimposing in every manner.
He was smart and kind, but his Saturday nights weren’t spent on dates with cheerleaders.
He didn’t have time for that; he was always either studying or working on his parents’ small farm.
We were friends in that distant way that high schoolers were, tossed together into a sea of hormones, petty gossip, and homework, only to part ways soon after with few words spoken.
The man standing on my front porch would have no trouble getting a date now.
His uniform stretches tightly over his broad chest and shoulders.
The last bits of sunlight illuminate his brown eyes, warming them into reflective pools of honey.
His blond eyelashes stand out against his tanned skin.
A light stubble covers his square jaw, adding a ruggedness to his handsome face.
He takes off his hat and rakes his hand through his sandy-blonde hair.
My eyes settle on his large, calloused hands, wondering what they would feel like against my skin.
I look up just as he raises an eyebrow at me questioningly.
I realize that I’ve been staring, drinking in the sight of him like a cool glass of water on a hot day.
My cheeks warm in embarrassment as I step out onto the porch.
I walk past him to place my hands on the railing and turn my face toward the woods, willing my cheeks to turn back to their normal color.
Something inside me purrs when his husky voice cuts through the silence.
“Ava, it’s so good to see you.” I turn back to him, and my face heats as he looks me up and down with a boyish grin that demonstrates his appreciation for what he sees.
He clears his throat and his lips turn down.
“I’m sorry it’s not under better circumstances. ”
“Yeah, you too.”
The sun glints off of his gold class ring when his hand touches mine. “Tell me about what’s been going on,” he says with his eyebrows pinched together in concern.
I stare at our hands, my eyes tracing the initials carved on his ring.
I blow out a heavy sigh. I can’t tell him everything.
I can’t stand the thought of it all being in a police report.
My eyes cast upward, meeting his gaze. To my surprise, his eyes aren’t filled with suspicion, but compassion and worry.
My eyes blur as the tears begin to fall, running down my cheeks.
When I open my mouth, a dam opens and the words spill freely.
I tell him everything. With every word, I feel the weight of my problems falling away.
James steps closer, his arm wrapping around me while his hand rubs gentle circles over my upper back.
I lean into him, pressing my head to his shoulder, breathing him in.
He smells like citrus and sandalwood. Warmth fans out from his hand, branching out and reaching through me until my entire body feels relaxed.
Is this what it feels like to be safe? Does protection feel like a warm blanket and strong arms?
It’s so foreign to me that I’m not really sure.
“It’s going to be okay, Ava,” he whispers against the crown of my head. “I’m going to find this guy. I won’t let anything happen to you.”
I nod, feeling entirely certain that he means that.
“I’m going to drive by your house tonight and stay close by. Have you replaced the locks?”
“I, uh, haven’t yet, no,” I stumble around my words, embarrassed that I have yet to install the new locks I bought.
He pulls his hand away from my back and smiles down at me. “It’s okay. I can help you install them if you need it.” He reaches into his pocket and hands me a business card. “My cell number is on the back. I want you to call me if anything happens…or if you’re afraid.”
“Thank you,” I say quietly as I give his hand a little squeeze. “Do you…maybe…want to come in for a cup of coffee?”
His mouth turns up into a wide smile. “I wish I could, but I have a couple more stops to make tonight. I’d really love a rain check, though.”
I press my lips together, trying to avoid the frown they’re trying to pull into. I can feel the warmth rushing to my cheeks which are surely turning a vibrant shade of pink. What am I doing? I get hot over thoughts about my stalker and now I’m trying to ask a deputy on a date?
His finger presses gently under my chin, lifting my gaze to his eyes. “I’m serious about that rain check, Ava,” he says confidently.
At his insistence, I go back inside and lock the door before watching him leave from my window. I feel a lightness that I didn’t expect. He believes me, and everything’s going to be okay.