Chapter 19
NINETEEN
CASSIDY
Later that night, Cassidy’s brother, Julian, wouldn’t stop calling her. She was curled up in her flannel pajamas on her couch with a bowl of creamy chicken and dumplings when she finally answered on the third ring.
“Is everything okay?” she asked, tucking a fleece blanket around her while Muff jumped up and made herself cozy behind her knees.
“Everything’s fine here. It’s you we’re worried about.” In the background, she heard Miles call out a cheerful, “Hi!”
“Why? I told you everything is fine,” Cassidy said—and this time, she meant it.
“Sure, that’s what you said, but I wasn’t convinced.”
“I was just nervous. But my week took a turn for the better. I’ve spent time with some friends, met dozens of new customers… I’ve really started to feel like part of the community.”
“Well, that’s a relief. It’s nothing like New York or Paris, is it?”
“It’s not. But that’s a good thing. The people are so kind, the shop and cocoa café pop-up are thriving… and there’s a guy…”
She closed her eyes and sighed, wondering why she felt the need to tell her brother about Liam.
But she did. Growing up, they’d only had each other and Grand-maman.
They’d looked out for each other. Things had shifted a bit after Julian started dating Miles and then got married. But he was still her best friend.
“A guy, huh? Is he cute?”
“Hey now!” Miles called in the background.
“He’s basically a sexy lumberjack… well, a farmer really. Broad shoulders, beard, rough hands,” Cassidy said, just to give her brother a hard time.
“Shut the frick up. Maybe we will come to Maple Falls,” Julian said with a laugh.
“Sorry to say, but I’m pretty sure he’s just into girls, but you never know…” she teased. “Anyway, we’re just friends. I’m trying to focus on the shop, and you know I made that ‘no men until the new year’ vow. But Liam did help me on Tuesday when I had an allergic reaction.”
The men both sucked in a breath.
“I was trying to help set up the town Christmas tree, and I totally forgot how much Norway spruces make me itch.” She downplayed the reaction, not wanting to worry them any further.
“How do you forget that?” Miles asked.
“Because this man makes me scatterbrained! I don’t know how to describe it. But here’s the thing, he kinda hates Christmas.”
Another gasp. “Hates Christmas?” Julian said. “Oh honey, you can’t date a grinch.”
“I guess he’s not a full-on grinch. Not year-round, anyway. It’s just… his girlfriend died at Christmas a few years ago. And it’s really messed him up.”
The line went quiet for a moment.
“Well, that’s just horrible,” Julian said gently.
“Poor guy,” Miles added.
Cassidy thought back to how she’d toned down her holiday outfit earlier. She just hadn’t wanted to push Christmas on someone who clearly struggled with the season.
“I don’t know… maybe I am a bit over-the-top with all the Christmas stuff.”
“You shut your mouth,” Julian said. “You better not change who you are just because this man has unresolved issues.”
Julian sounded an awful lot like Zoe.
“Listen to your brother,” Miles chimed in. “Don’t let his walls make you think you have to shrink yourself. You’ve already played that game.”
Cassidy sighed, tugging at the corner of her blanket. “I know I shouldn’t. I know who I am, and I like that person. Or now I do, anyway. But… I guess part of me just wanted to help him. Make it easier. Even though I know I can’t.”
“That’s your problem, Cassidy,” Miles said gently. “You always try to fix people.”
“Fatal character flaw,” she muttered.
“No,” Julian said. “It’s not a flaw. It’s one of your best traits. But there’s a difference between helping others and hurting yourself.”
She swallowed hard, eyes prickling. “Yeah. I know.”
“Good,” Julian said. “Because the Cassidy I know wears snowflake earrings in July and bakes Christmas cookies for the Easter Bunny.”
“And don’t you dare let some brooding lumberjack make you forget it,” Miles added.
Cassidy laughed, the sound soft but real. “Thanks, you two. I needed that.”
“Anytime,” Julian said. “Now go hang up and put on something obnoxiously festive.”
“I already am,” she said with a smile. “And Muff’s in a reindeer sweater, just for the record.”
After they’d caught up a bit more, she hung up, her phone slipping from her hand as she leaned back against the couch, warmth still buzzing in her chest from the call. But the second her mind quieted, it shifted straight to Liam.
She wondered what he was wearing. Maybe that fitted thermal shirt that stretched across his broad shoulders, the sleeves pushed up over strong forearms dusted with a hint of dark hair. Maybe those worn jeans that hugged his hips in a way that made her mouth go dry.
Or maybe nothing at all.
Heat bloomed low in her belly, the thought of him fresh out of the shower, droplets of water sliding down the lines of muscle across his chest, disappearing beneath a towel slung low on his hips.
She imagined the way his hair would be damp, curling at the ends, the scruff on his jaw darkening as he ran a hand over it, those deep eyes meeting hers, dark and hungry.
Cassidy squeezed her eyes shut, pressing a palm to her flushed cheek.
Get it together.
This was Maple Falls, not one of those steamy romance novels she kept hidden on her Kindle. But God, it was getting harder and harder to remember that when it came to Liam Hawthorne.
Was the no-men vow really that important to her anymore? The year was nearly up anyway.
Yes, she told herself. It had to be. She’d gone almost the whole year—she couldn’t just give up now. And she couldn’t afford to be swept away with romance. Her shop had only been open for a week. She had a major Christmas competition to get ready for: Her light-up slot was in just under two weeks.
And she couldn’t lose herself again. She’d already toned down her Christmas outfit once for him. It didn’t matter if she’d done it to be kind. She couldn’t change herself, reduce herself, risk heartbreak all over again, for a man.
No, she needed to stick to her vow, stay true to herself, and focus on launching her cocoa empire.
She’d see him tomorrow on the hike, and she’d be ready—head held high, holiday earrings firmly in place.