11
Was Pulse expecting another wild bar? Did they think Leo's favorite place would be a grand opera house or a concert? Pulse would have pinned Leo to be someone always chasing after life—the next adrenaline fix, another feel-good vice.
A library, however? It was a surprise.
"This is more my speed, honestly," Leo commented, "bars and pubs are nice, but this? I would choose this any day."
The library was tall yet quaint. Pulse could walk through the doorway comfortably. They did make a face when their cowlick got caught on the edge. 'Damned thing'
Inside was dim; a warm amber glow from the antique sconces and lamps welcomed them.
Leo reminded them to speak in hushed tones out of respect.
Glancing around, Pulse wondered if there were other dreamers to be mindful of.
As far as they knew, Quark, Leo, and themselves were the only ones here.
Even if they could hear the ambiance of turning pages and the flickering hum of the lights, there was not another soul in that building.
"What is that smell?" Quark asked, whispering.
"That," Leo replied, conclusively, "is what is called bibliosmia: the most amazing smell in the world."
Quark was quick to start stroking the spines of the books on the shelves.
Each was worn and tattered after years of use by avid readers.
Admittedly, Pulse was confused by why Leo would enjoy such a place.
To them, the background felt like a constant stream of white noise.
This was something they believed to be in stark contrast to her personality.
How can a place so calm and boring draw her in? Then again, this was perfect for Quark.
Quark's eyes were wide, seeing something magical before him Pulse could not.
His fingers were so delicate touching them, like they would turn to dust if he were not careful enough.
Even though the shelves were a proper height for Pulse, Quark's lips pouted when some of the more pristine books were just out of his reach.
Books with clean cloth covers, embroidered with silver, bronze, and gold titles. Words Pulse couldn't translate. From Quark's puzzled expression, neither could he.
Pulse pulled out another cigarette when Leo swatted their shoulder. "Don't smoke in here," she hissed. "That'll ruin the books."
Immediately shoving it back in their pocket, they bowed, down casting their eyes with embarrassment. "Sorry, sorry..."
She nodded. "Follow me, you look a little lost."
"A little," they murmured, letting her lead through the narrow bookshelves. "I'm not saying this is bad, but it's different from what I'm used to."
"What are you used to then?" She dragged her finger along some of the titles, looking thoughtful, both by what she saw and the words Pulse said.
"In the choir, I'm used to there always being something. Something was happening all the time. Practice, talking—a constant hum of noise. Especially when I became the lead, I was always doing something, be it fine-tuning a song or helping a star with the music. I do like having a chance to relax.
Being with you and Quark—" they switched topics, leaning close to Leo's ear, "—which, by the way, did something happen between you two at the pub?"
Leo's mouth twitched slightly before pressing her lips together. Her eyes glazed over like she started to get lost in a daydream. "Just a nice moment, that's all."
Pulse wondered about her. Was there more to her? Something deeper than her usual sprightly energy. Leo shifted, turning to Pulse as they studied her. Would the silence be enough to let them see deeper into her soul? Pulse noticed, for a nanosecond, a different Leo. A subdued Leo.
"I have to apologize for yesterday."
Pulse tilted their head. "What are you sorry for?"
She scratched her head, eyes focused on a random book on her left side, "I shouldn't have come on so strong. You two said you were new to this dream deal, yeah?"
"Well, yes, but—"
"I know I was acting weird that day. I was looking for a good time before falling asleep, and I—I was being a big ol' slut that night. I should have taken it slower with you two. You both must have felt so uncomfortable."
"No, no..." Pulse squeezed her shoulder, getting her to look them in the face. "It was strange, yes, but I wouldn't say uncomfortable. That's not the right word at all."
"Still, it was wrong. Usually–"
"You're not like that?"
"Oh, I can't make myself a liar just yet," she joked. "But usually, I'm more understanding. I've dealt with a star before, way back when, and they had experience before me, too. However, I should have considered how it made you and Quark feel."
'How did it make me feel,' Pulse wondered. Having a solid body came with new terms. Things about this dream life came with new words and definitions they were forced to learn on the fly, all the time. Some aspects were faster to pick up on than others, but at least this was clear: "I liked it."
"You—you did?"
"Leo, you are just extraordinary. I like your boldness. I like how big your personality is. I like that you are just unabashed with your emotions. I like that about you. I like that a lot."
Little by little, Pulse could see into her; past the dream and seeing the dreamer. Beyond her gentle expression was profound gratitude, and an honest reflection of the dreamer began to radiate between them. Once more, Pulse could feel something, a new warmth in their throat.
As quick as they started to see Leo's true being, watching for the briefest moment in time how she morphed into something sincere, it was snapped away when something caught her attention.
"Oh my god," she gasped, rushing away to grab a book off the shelf. "Yes! I have not seen this book in forever!"
Quark rushed over after hearing Leo's delighted yell.
"Finally, this book is mine!" She went on, clutching the story to her chest. A gray book with gold embroidery and a pearly title. 'Lonely Liminal Labyrinth.'
"What is it about," Quark inquired, leaning over Leo's shoulder.
"It's like a poetry book. Not really, it's hard to describe. I've only been able to read the first three pages, but I've wanted it for so long. I must have been 14 when I first found it. Always in a bookstore, and I never had the money, but now I can check it out and—" her face fell, horrified.
"My card." She shoved the book in Quark's hands, patting herself down.
"Where is my library card? Are you fucking kidding me?"
Pulse and Quark stood close to her, taking turns rubbing her back.
"What's wrong?" Pulse shot a concerned look to Quark as Leo became increasingly disgruntled.
"Fuck, fuck, I don't have it," Leo looked let out a sound like a muffled yell, a groan, and a whine. "Damn it, damn it all. Of course, I wouldn't have my card on me. Of course!"
"Can't you just take it?" Quark offered. Leo shook her head, trying to wipe away tears in a way that looked like she was just scratching her eyes.
"I can't steal from a library. God, I would be a garbage person if I did that. Damn it, I was so close this time..."
Pulse rubbed her back soothingly. "It's okay, c'mon now..."
They couldn't rationalize what was so meaningful about a book–a book she wanted since she was 14?
How many years has she hunted for this one story?
"C'mon, I don't want you to end the night on a bad note. The book will pop up again, won't it?"
"It—it usually does," Leo had to swallow back tears. "I have never been able to keep it though. It's always something."
Quark hugged her. The poor white star seemed so worried his hands shook.
He was inadvertently feeding off her distress.
"Hey hey hey, it'll be okay. Pulse and I now know your favorite book. Next time, we will all make sure to have money, or a card, or something. We will work together for you to have this book."
Leo began to shake her head; "I can't—"
"It's okay," Quark cupped her cheek. "We are your wishing stars, right? If you want this, we can do it for you. Next time though, when it appears again. I promise. We both promise."
Leo looked at them, befuddled. Pulse gave her their winning smile.
"It's okay," they reminded Leo once more. "It's okay..."
A tear dripped down her cheek. Pulse was the one to wipe it with their thumb and found it strange.
It was cool against their skin, but it burned.
Burning in their chest, in one corner of their eye.
They couldn’t understand wanting a book of all things so much it would make someone cry, but they knew it with other things.
Having your hopes, whims, or desires literally in your hands but unable to keep it.
As simple as it was, just a heavy block of paper with a fancy cover, this was special to her; be it empathy or anything else, it pained them to see her hopes dashed.
Smiling, Leo took both their palms, kissing them as she held them to her face. She was trying to comfort them instead.
"God, you two..." she said. "You two are something else..."
'Poor thing,' Pulse thought, their chest clenching as she said that her alarm was going off. 'Time for her to wake up,' she explained. Pulse clutched her hands. No, she doesn't deserve to end the night on such a downer. It couldn’t have ended so soon! Didn’t she have more time?
She began to fade, her body becoming transparent. Leo assured them both she had a sublime time, nonetheless.
"People need their coffee," she said. "But there is tomorrow night. I'll be back soon!"
Pulse wanted to hold her hand, maybe convince her to stay longer. The stars refused to believe it had already been 8 hours. Quark held his hand out, trying to grab at her ghost.
"Tomorrow," Quark repeated with his voice fading off. It wouldn’t be long unti the library begins to fade.
Yet, Pulse was captivated even more than before. This carbon creature, with a lifespan that is undoubtedly nothing more than a blip in the star's life, had such a fervid hold on Pulse. It was a grasp in their chest that tugged and yanked them forcefully to her whims and wishes. And Pulse adored it.
'What are you doing to us, Leo?'