20. Ezekiel
Three Months Later…
Today felt bittersweet. It was my mother’s birthday and also our paternity photoshoot. Crystal and I were in a better space. Took some time, but God was slowly softening her heart towards me. She required actions over words. Not a hard adjustment but it called me to stand on my word as a man. She challenged my integrity and honor as the mother of my child. Refused for my lack of accountability to interfere with how our son needed to be raised.
She kept me on my toes.
Sunnie kept me centered.
“Okay now, Crystal. Lean your body his way. Wrap your arm around his and rest your head on his shoulder. Cross your right ankle over your left. Dad, face forward. Okay. Yes. Just like that.” Cedric Jones was hand selected by Crystal and Sunnie to spearhead our photoshoot.
Crystal wanted a maternity shoot that went along with her theme of blue and white, but also our friendship. Tasteful poses and looks. When it came to her poses of being topless, those were either solo or a piece of fabric covering her breast.
She asked Sunnie to style her nails. Her hair had been picked out in a large curly fro, giving her a goddess aura with a matching gold vine crown. I didn’t think she’d want me in her pictures. It was no secret that I wasn’t her favorite person.
“Okay, now turn towards each other and Ezekiel, place your hands on her stomach and Crystal, put your hands over his. Tell her something funny so I can catch that beautiful smile.”
Crystal’s brows were already wiggling and lips parting. “I doubt you have a comedic bone in your body.”
“I’ll rather tell a corny joke than have my damn coochie ripped open by your big head son. I have the sonogram as proof. He’s about to make you get stitches.” And there was Cedric’s golden shot.
Head tossed back, dimples sucked in, and a wide smile. Crystal was a glowing beauty.
“Oh, my gosh! How dare you? That head is all you, sir.” She couldn’t stop giggling and the camera ate it up. “Wait… wait… I gotta pee.” Her knees kissed, and she gripped my hand. “Oh, shit, Zeek.” She squealed. Eyes shot down to the floor as I felt the wetness on my feet. “I think I’m peeing on myself.” She whispered looking mortified.
Nah, that wasn’t pee.
She’s been complaining about our son sitting on her bladder but that much liquid to stain the front of her jeans and puddle the floor.
“Uh, Crystal, are you okay?” Cedric had seen exactly what I saw.
Her water broke.
Panic hit her hard and before she could freak out, I had to calm her down because shit was about to get real. “Hey, focus on me. It’s okay. Dr. Hamilton said you were due any day now and today is that day. I have your spare baby bag in my truck.” Good thing she packed two bags with the same stuff for my car and hers. “I’m going to carry you to your dressing room so you can change. While you’re doing that, I’m going to call Dr. Hamilton and let her know we’re on the way to the hospital. Everything is going to be okay.”
Cedric kept snapping, pointing his video crew to record our moment.
“I-I’m scared, Zeek.” She wrapped her arms around me, shivering and taking deep breaths. Sunnie moved alongside me, opening the door and getting her clothes.
“Let me help you.” Sunnie was on the move and assisting.
She and I had the same goal in mind - keep Crystal calm and get her to the hospital safely.
“I got you, Crys. I promise I got you. Let Sunnie help you while I make these phone calls.” I placed her on the couch and Sunnie jumped in while I grabbed her phone and mine to make the calls.
Calls to her doctor. Calls to her best friend and family.
Once I was done with her crew of people and making sure I had her birthing plan in the bag, I called Jeremiah and Bishop.
“Ahhhhh, shit! That hurt.” Her contractions were starting. Sunnie worked fast to put her fro into two crowned braids, putting the gold vein crown back on. “Oh, my God! It hurtssss,” she cried and that was my queue to leave.
Picking her up again, Sunnie grabbed her bags and we were gone. Cedric snapped and continued recording until we got in the car. Hearing Crystal’s cries of agony and seeing the pain etched on her face, I refused to release her from my arms. I felt like I could protect them better this way. Sunnie drove and I sat in the back with Crystal in my lap. Her contractions were coming back-to-back. From ten minutes apart to four by the time we made it to the hospital.
“Dad, I know you want to protect mom but I need you to put her on the bed so we can get her situated.” A nurse pleaded.
Reluctantly I placed her on the bed and I stepped back but not back too far. Sunnie stayed downstairs in the waiting room to give our families updates. By the time they had her in a gown and hooked up to the monitor, her screams echoed down the hall and her best friend arrived just in time.
Crystal was in active labor.
Dr. Hamilton came in and checked her cervix, letting us know that our son was about to be born now. In an hour she was fully dilated and unable to get an epidural. When she heard that news, she cried harder. I didn’t know what to do other than let her squeeze the circulation out of my hand.
“Okay, Crystal. I need two good pushes. Dad, come see.” Dr. Hamilton coached Crystal, her best friend Megan held her other hand, and I stood there watching her coochie stretch as my son’s head passed through. “Okay, his head is out. Shoulders are next. Relax, take a deep breath, and let your body naturally push him out.”
The abilities of a woman’s body were astonishing.
“Do you see him?” Crystal’s red eyes questioned.
All I could do was blink until my vision cleared. “I see him, Crys. He’s coming.”
I’ve accomplished a lot in my thirty-plus years of living on this earth. Traveled around the world. Meet some amazing people. Made a lot of money. I fell in love with the woman of my dreams. But nothing, and I mean nothing, brought me more joy and happiness than this moment right here.
God is so good.
A consuming fire consumed my body. Heart pounded with a fervency I’d never felt before. For a brief moment, ten seconds of silence covered the room, and then it happened. He was born. His screams gut-punched me, almost bringing me to my knees watching Dr. Hamilton place him on Crystal’s chest. His tiny body curled, and lungs awakened.
“Oh, my goodness. Ezekiel, look at him. He’s so tiny and perfect.” She cried, hand reaching out for me. “Look at your son, Zeek.”
Resting an arm over her pillows, I leaned down, afraid to touch him, but couldn’t pull my eyes away. Covered in all his amniotic fluids with a surprisingly head full of black curls like his mother, my son’s eyes were wide open. Tiny slanted eyes gripping me by the chest. A small tiny human with my face.
It was hard as hell for me to breathe.
Ezekiel Donovan Jr.
My junior.
My mini me.
I refused to give him my middle name. Hell no. My dad wanted nothing to do with me, so why would I honor him by tainting my son with his name?
“Little Dude, I’m your daddy.” Crystal tried to catch my tears, but there were too many.
“Dad, it’s time to cut the umbilical cord. Are you ready?”
Shit.
Was I ready to cut him from the cord that connected him to his mother, now fully making me responsible for him, too?
“I’m ready.” I cut the cord, and they whisked him away to clean him up.
Wherever they took him, there I was watching and making sure they weren’t hurting him. I’ve watched hundreds of YouTube videos. I’ve asked Dr. Hamilton a million and one questions. Read the books and left my review. I knew what they were and weren’t supposed to do.
“Okay, Dad. Do you want some skin-to-skin contact?”
This right here is the moment I’ve been waiting for. Not just to hold him but to feel his skin against my skin.
I looked over at Crystal to see them pushing out the afterbirth. She was exhausted and it showed. Finding me over the shoulder of Dr. Hamilton, she and I locked eyes and smiled. We made it. Bullshit and past trauma aside, we made it. Our son was born.
I carried my strength as a man like a badge of honor, yet with a heart that threatened to burst from the sheer magnitude of what I was about to experience. As they placed my son into my arms for the first time, the world tilted slightly, recalibrating around this tiny, perfect being whose life I now held. The moment his skin touched mine, it was like electricity—raw and unfiltered—coursing through me, a connection so profound it anchored me to the spot. Every inch of me, toughened by life’s battles, softened in surrender to this fragile soul that clung to me, seeking warmth, seeking safety.
My son, with eyes barely open, gazed up at me. Those brown eyes, clear and trusting, hit me harder than any challenge I’d ever faced in the outside world. Here was this little guy, not even a day old, looking at me like I was his entire world. It shook me to my core—the realization that I was this kid’s everything. His protector. His guide. His hero.
I leaned in, face soaked, whispering promises into the delicate curve of his ear. Promises of protection, of guidance, of never-ending support. This tiny, trusting human had unknowingly demanded the best of me, and I’d rise to that challenge with everything I had in me. Made me ask God for forgiveness again for how I treated his mother in the beginning.
This wasn’t just about survival anymore; it was about providing, caring, and loving unconditionally.
Holding my son, feeling the weight of his life against my chest, I understood for the first time the true meaning of strength.
“I have a gift for you.” Cleaned and eating on a cup of ice, Crystal asked her best friend to hand me her phone. “I had this commissioned as a ‘Welcome to Fatherhood’ gift. It’s done, but I thought I had more time to have it delivered.”
“I’ll hold the phone for you.” Megan must’ve sensed that I didn’t want to untangle my arms from around my son.
There, in the center of her phone, was a painting of my mom holding a baby. Our baby. “I gave the artist our baby pictures and asked him to come up with his vision for our child. Crazy how he hit it on the head, right?”
Crazy wasn’t even the word.
He painted my son’s exact face… with my mother holding him.
Losing her felt like losing a big piece of my heart, but then my son was born, making it whole again, on my mother’s birthday.
That revelation tipped the iceberg.
“Crys, thank you.”
“You’re welcome. Our journey as parents has officially begun, Ezekiel.”
Indeed, it had, and I was grateful to have been more than equipped to handle our new seasons of life.
By the time the doctor and nurses finished cleaning Crystal and EJ off, another hour had passed before I could step out and update my family. My smile was wider than any smile I’ve ever smiled. I was a father. A whole daddy. God really did his big one by allowing him to share the same birthday as my mom. That alone told me that my young king was special.
“Congratulations, Zeek.” Jeremiah stood first when I walked in the waiting room. My niece held a teddy bear almost the same size as her. Leann held their sleeping son in her arms who had a tight grip around the balloon strings even in his sleep.
“Thank you, Uncle Jeremiah.” I hugged my brother for a good minute.
One, I needed a hug. Needed to feel his love and have a guarded place to finally exhale and breathe.
“Please tell me you didn’t come out here without any pictures.” Aziza and Bishop were next to congratulate me.
“How is Crystal? Did everything go okay?” Leann moved in my arms next.
“She’s tired, but doing great. Everything went great. Here is a full gallery of my little man.” Handing my phone over to her, I let them crowd around each other while I made my way over to the sleepy-eyed beauty wearing a loopy smile.
“Sunnie Mae, give big daddy some love.” I used to dread this moment. The moment when my son was born and Sunnie had to choose. Her saying that she would be here with him being in his mother’s womb was different now that he had been born.
“Congratulations, Zeek. Is everyone okay?” She buried her face in my neck, and a short shiver caused her breathing to release choppy.
She was scared.
She was terrified of our future.
Holding EJ in my arms made me hopeful.
“Everything is perfect. Come. There’s someone I want to introduce you to.” Taking her shaking hand in mine, I told the rest of my family that I’d be back to let them go see Crystal and EJ.
Seeing Sunnie so quiet and nervous as we walked down the hall made me want to give her every reassuring word to appease her nerves but in a situation like this, actions spoke louder.
“Zeek, I can wait.” Eyes wide and feet planted, she took one look at Crystal breastfeeding EJ and wanted to run for the hills.
Hearing Sunnie’s whispered plea, Crystal smiled at her and motioned for her to come her way. “Hey, Sunnie.”
“He-Hey, Crystal. Congratulations.” Looking back at me, she waited until I nodded before moving closer to see the tiny human I created. “Wow. He’s such a beautiful baby.” Her giggles released a few tears as she cooed over him. “I hate to tell you, girl, but all you did was carry that baby. He’s his daddy”s son.”
Fake pouting, Crystal whined. “I knowwww. It breaks my heart that I did all the heavy work for him to come out looking nothing like me. Reach into that bag on the chair. There’s something in there for you.” Sunnie’s doe eyes questioned me before she reached into the bag. In the palm of her hand was a rectangular box.
“Wow.” She gasped, eyes flooded with tears. “It’s so beautiful.” She sniffed, doing her best to hug Crystal without squishing EJ.
Inside was a gold necklace with a lotus flow charm and a personal message in Crystal”s handwriting. “It takes a village to raise a child. You’re in Zeek’s life, so that means you’re going to be a part of the village responsible for our son’s safety and upbringing. He might not be yours, but I trust that you will care for him as if he is when he is in your care.”
“I’m truly honored and thankful for this. I promise to never mistreat him, but to love him as if he were my own. Thank you.” Sealing her promise with a kiss, Sunnie kissed EJ’s head and made her way back over to me. “Thank you for this. Thank you for including me.”
Allowing my lips to calm her anxious nerves, I held her in my arms and thanked God for the mercy he poured over me and my loved one.
God’s plans were better than anything I could’ve ever imagined. Me, the sinner and embarrassment to my family, found redemption, thanks to God’s glory beacon, never letting me forget my home.
The End!