Chapter 5
Chapter Five
Although I ran away from home, I didn’t actually go that far if I’m being honest. I ended up leaving for a smaller town only three hours from the city.
River Falls, Oregon, has now become my new home.
With the cash I took out before leaving, I have quite a bit stashed away, but since I want to make it last as long as possible, I do my best to stay under the radar.
I quickly found a place and rented a tiny studio apartment above the local bookstore.
The stairs creak.
The windows let in the chilly air.
The shower pressure is nonexistent.
I couldn’t be more in love.
The owner of the bookstore, May, hired me to help her out. She says it's because she’s getting too old to climb the ladder to put the books away.
I think it’s because she took one look at me and saw me for who I am.
A lost girl looking for a place to call home.
She never asks many questions about my past; she just teaches me the ropes of the store and tells me that my eyes remind her of her granddaughter’s.
I dyed my hair burgundy for a pop of color to feel like someone new, and I spend so much time at the local cafe that everyone knows me by name.
But at night, at night, I dream of blue eyes.
Of a man I’ve only met once, of a night at a bar, and the way I feel like I can still remember how his hand felt on my arm.
Most nights I wake up smiling, but every so often I just wake up feeling sad.
I hear my phone buzz as I’m brushing my teeth.
I ignore it, then hear it buzz again.
I spit out my toothpaste, rinse, and grab my phone, figuring it is probably Dana sending her daily “Good Morning” photo of Graham. Instead, I see a message from an unknown number.
Unknown: Good morning, I hope it’s not too early, but it’s Will. I got your number from my grandmother. I just wanted to see if you were still good for 5:30 tonight?
I stare at my screen, and my stomach flips the way it always does before something important happens.
Lilly: Yes. Still good for me.
Unknown: Great. I’ll meet you at Cafe Blu.
After my shift ended, I took the back stairs two at a time, unlocking the apartment above the bookstore with more urgency than I cared to admit.
I meant to get ready right away, but instead I got distracted while standing in the narrow hallway, reading the backs of new arrivals that I was supposed to be putting away, acting like I had all the time in the world.
I didn’t.
Thirty minutes. That was it.
I rushed through a shower, leaving my clothes in a careless trail across the floor, and pulled on a soft black sweater, leggings, and ankle boots. Safe. Comfortable. Me.
Not meet your future husband fancy.
Just coffee with a stranger whom his grandma set me up with casual.
I give myself a last once-over in the mirror.
Still me. Still, the girl who ran from her marriage.
Cafe Blu is warm and dimly lit at this time of night. Full of low, obscure music and flickering candles. I’m lucky enough to get here early because my anxiety hates being late.
I’m stirring my drink when the door opens, my breath catches, and everything inside me goes still.
He walks like he owns the place.
Tall. Sharp jaw. Blue eyes.
Those familiar eyes that I’ve seen more times than I can count in my dreams. My heart starts racing, and suddenly I forget what to do with my hands.
I watch as he scans the room, and when his eyes land on me, his entire body stills. It’s a brief stillness that most people wouldn’t notice, but I do.
He walks over to the table I’m sitting at, like he’s not quite sure either.
“Lilly?” he asks.
His voice hits me like deja vu. He’s the man from my birthday, the man whose jacket I have hidden in the back of my closet.
“Yes,” I manage to squeak out. “You must be…?”
“Will,” he says.
We shake hands longer than necessary, but his presence is warm. It feels familiar in a way I never expected.
“So does your grandma do this often?’ I say with a nervous laugh.
“Never, so I guess you’re the lucky girl.” He replies with a quirk of his mouth.
We both laugh, and from there the conversation flows.
We talk about my job at the bookstore and his job in corporate management. I tell him about Graham and how much I miss him. I show him some of the photos Dana sent me of Graham. He tells me how he moved away from the city to spend more time with his grandma and how the adjustment has been going.
“So you really moved here just for your grandma?” I ask, stirring my drink even though the sugar dissolved minutes ago.
His answer comes too quickly. “I moved here because it made sense.”
I glance up. “That doesn’t sound like a yes.”
One corner of his mouth lifts, but his eyes stay sharp. “You’re observant.”
“I’m really not,” I say, shaking my head. “I just… ask questions.”
His gaze lingers on me a second too long. “That’s not nothing.” Something tightens in my chest at the way he says it, not like he’s learning something new about me, but like he’s confirming it.
I push the feeling away and take a sip of my drink. “Well, River Falls isn’t exactly a booming metropolis.”
He hums. “No. But it’s good for people who want to disappear,” he says, like he’s stating a fact instead of an opinion.
My fingers are still around the mug. I laugh it off because that’s easier than wondering why it feels like he said that to me instead of about the town. Will watches me over the rim of his cup, like he’s waiting to see if I’ll catch it. I don’t.
For the first time since leaving, I finally feel like I did the right thing.
The deepest part of my heart still feels awful about leaving Liam the way I did, but looking into Will’s eyes, I know I did the right thing.
There’s something about him that feels familiar. But I can’t recognize what it is.