Chapter 18
Miss Cornelia opened the door and allowed us first entrance. We found ourselves in a small foyer with maps of all kinds that hung from the sanded walls. I noticed something strange about the maps and stepped up to a half dozen of the charts.
I half-turned to Miss Cornelia as she set her basket down and took up Cassian’s coat. “Do these maps all show the same place?”
She draped his coat over her arm and hurried over to me. “Yes, Mrs. Holt. My master commissioned two dozen artists to draw his land holdings.”
“Nothing gives a man more pleasure than to see what he’s achieved.”
The sudden voice came from a doorway to our left, where a man of forty strolled through the arch.
He was only a few inches taller than me, with a thick, handlebar black mustache.
His thinning hair was slicked back, revealing a few patches that no amount of hair gel could hide.
The squire wore a tweed-like outfit of some rough textile, and he marched across the bare boards in a pair of heavy black boots across the floor.
The squire stopped in front of our little troupe. Miss Cornelia curtsied to him and nodded at us. “These visitors were looking for a place to stay, Squire.”
The squire folded his arms over his chest and inspected us. “Were they? What trade are you in, sir?”
“I’m currently in the administrative part of the castle at the capital,” Cassian informed him as he held out his hand. “And you must be Squire Torquatus.”
Torquatus pried one of his arms loose and shook hands. “That must not pay very well, seeing as how there are quite a number of them in the castle, or so I’ve heard.”
“I get along,” Cassian assured him as he gestured to me. “May I introduce my lovely wife, Mrs. Holt.”
He bowed his head to me. “A pleasure, Mrs. Holt. Now then, Mr. Holt, I can show you the best room you ever slept in, but mind you, I expect a fair price from my guests.”
“Of course, Squire Torquatus,” Cassian answered as he patted his pocket where our meager coins chinked. “If you would show us the way through your vast home.”
Torquatus rubbed his hands together and bobbed his head. “Of course. It’s just this way.”
He led us up the elegant wooden staircase to the second floor. I couldn’t help but notice, however, that Miss Cornelia watched with bitten lips as we ascended the steps. Her eyes seemed to be pleading with us for something, but I couldn’t guess what.
A single hall ran the width of the house and separated the rear from the front. Our host led us leftward to the very last room on the rear-side of the house. He opened the door and swept his arm toward the entrance.
“Peruse the quarters to your liking.”
We stepped inside and found ourselves in a clean but small room.
The space occupied was perhaps twelve feet square, and much of the room was filled with a huge bed.
A small fireplace connected to one of the chimneys I had seen from outside, and a dresser of some age was huddled in a corner to our right.
A single paneled window looked out on a small garden with a couple of sheds, and beyond that was the next street over.
The sheds had seen better days, with their peeling paint and moss-covered roofs. One of them even leaned to one side.
Torquatus slithered in after us with a grin as wide as a Cheshire cat. “Well? What do you think? Quite a cozy little nest for you, isn’t it?”
Cassian brushed his hand over the soft quilt that covered the bed. “Quite cozy. How much do you charge per night?”
“My terms are a modest half a glin for the night, and food will be provided tonight and in the morning.”
I turned from the window in time to see Cassian lift an eyebrow. “A half a glin? You could get two nights in the capital for such a price, with food included.”
Torquatus bobbed his head. “I have no doubt, but you see, I have the only suitable room for several miles, and that makes it in much demand. My price reflects my desire to allow only the best clientele, those who would not ruin the draperies. You understand, I’m sure.”
I perfectly understood his bullshit. The man wanted the highest payers to occupy the room.
That’s when a thought struck me, and I wandered around the room searching desperately for the most important of matters. “Where’s the bathroom?”
Torquatus scurried over to the window I had just vacated and used a hand to gesture at something past the panes. “There, Mrs. Holt. A lovely little outhouse in the middle of my lovely garden.”
I joined him at the window and studied where he indicated. My mouth dropped open. “You mean one of those sheds?”
“Only one is a shed. The other is the outhouse.”
“The leaning one is the shed, right?”
Torquatus cleared his throat. “I, um, I’m afraid the leaning one is the outhouse. I have requested a handyman come, but he has yet to arrive.”
I could just imagine the skinflint eagerly sending for a handyman.
“And you guarantee that your rooms are without bugs of any kind?” Cassian inquired from his spot near the dresser. His eyes were directed at the gap between the wall and the furniture.
Torquatus puffed out his chest. “Of course! There has never been an infestation of any kind!”
Cassian pointed at the floor below the gap. “Then what are these?”
Torquatus and I hurried over, and my eyes widened.
A half dozen little green beetles scurried here and there in the corner.
They tried desperately to climb the walls and the furniture, but they ended up tumbling off the smooth wood and onto the floor, where they rocked to and fro on their backs before righting themselves.
Torquatus started back and pressed his arms against his chest as he sneered at the bugs. “Fieldshrouds! How in all the heavens did they get in here?”
Cassian crossed his arms over his chest and looked sternly down at our would-be host. “That isn’t what matters. What matters is that you desired to offer us a room for half a gild a night where there are already ‘occupants.’”
The color drained from Torquatus’ face. “I-I am sincerely sorry. I’ll have them removed at once and the room cleaned-”
“While you perform such basic duties, we’ll be sure to find ourselves a better room,” Cassian insisted as he strode past our flustered host and grabbed my hand. He tugged me toward the door. “Good night and goodbye, Squire Torquatus.”
“Wait!” Torquatus shrieked as he darted around us and blocked the door with his quivering body. “Y-you won’t tell anyone of this, will you?”
Cassian lifted his chin. “Of course. We wouldn’t want anyone else to have the same experience.”
Torquatus’ eyes bulged out of his head. “B-but that will ruin my reputation!”
My acquaintance shrugged. “We cannot seal our lips nor our eyes to what we’ve seen.”
Torquatus scooted up to him and pawed at the front of his shirt.
“But there must be a way-” His eyes lit up, and an almost maniacal smile stretched across his face.
“Yes! Yes, that’s it! A discount! I will give you this room for a steal!
All I ask is that you allow others to give me a second chance! I swear this won’t happen again!”
Cassian studied him impassively for a few moments before he nodded. “Very well.”
Torquatus looked about ready to jump through the ceiling for joy. “Thank you! Thank you, kind sir!” He grabbed Cassian’s free hand and planted a whole field of kisses on the back. “You are the kindest man I have ever known!”
Cassian removed his hand from the overly eager prostrations. “You haven’t named your price yet, sir.”
Torquatus’ face scrunched up, and he rubbed his chin between a few fingers. “Yes, well, I believe I said the original price for a night was a gild, wasn’t it?”
“Half a gild,” Cassian corrected him.
Torquatus winced. “I-I see. In that case, shall we make it a quarter of a gild?”
Cassian reached into his pocket and drew out the coin purse. He poured some of the contents into his palm and pinched the shiniest one in the pile between two fingers, which he then held out to our host. “What about this price?”
Torquatus’ face drooped longer than a wait till Christmas. “T-that, sir? But it’s only a measly ferrum!”
“And it’s worth the whole of your reputation,” Cassian warned him as he held out the simple coin.
Torquatus reluctantly stretched out his hand, and Cassian dropped the coin into his palm.
My companion clapped his hands before he rubbed them together.
“Excellent. Now, if you will excuse us, we must get some sleep.”
Torquatus pocketed the coin with as much glee as a mime at a funeral. “I’ll have the bugs removed at once then. Vesta can do it.”
Cassian nodded at me. “No. My wife is not as frightened of bugs as I am and will handle the removal.”
I looked in bewilderment at him, but a certain twinkle in his eyes sealed my lips.
Torquatus bowed his head. “You are most gracious, kind sir. I will inform my cook that you will take breakfast tomorrow-”
“I hope it will be a very large breakfast,” Cassian mused as he grasped my shoulder. “My wife is especially famished after she wakes.”
At this rate, he was going to ascribe to me every honor and dishonor known to man.
Torquatus cocked his head to one side, and one sharp eye fell on me. There was no love in those dark depths. “I see. I will warn the cook then. If you will excuse me.”
He slipped out, though not before giving us an impressive glower, before disappearing around the doorway.