Chapter 27
It was the Monday after the wedding and Eve had just finished work.
Joe looked apprehensive as he let her in and closed the door behind her.
He was wearing a plain white T-shirt and jeans again, and his face and arms were brown from the sun.
Eve felt an intense desire to kiss him, but something told her not to.
She placed one hand on his arm instead, feeling the muscles tense up.
‘Are you OK?’ she asked him.
‘I’m being spied on,’ he said.
‘By the police?’
He nodded. ‘I think so. I don’t know. I’m just getting a bad feeling.
I’m doing everything probation have asked.
I’m sticking to all my licence conditions and I’m trying to contribute to the probation meetings, but they’re still trying to get me to talk about something I didn’t do.
I’m never going to say I did it, and I’m pretty sure that’s being fed back to the police. ’
‘I’m sorry,’ Eve said. ‘I’m sorry this is so hard, Joe.’
‘It feels like they’re not going to leave me alone until they’ve got me again.’
‘I’m sorry,’ Eve said again. ‘Have you spoken to Sarah about it?’
‘No,’ he said, leaning back against the worktop next to the sink. ‘She’s doing enough already and she’s doing it for free. I don’t want to give her extra work.’
Eve nodded slowly. ‘So, when did you last speak to her?’
‘Not since our meeting on Friday. Why?’
‘Look, Joe. I want to give Sarah some money,’ she said, raising her eyes to meet his. ‘For the forensic tests and for … well, whatever else she needs. I’ve offered to pay for it all and she’s accepted – if you agree, that is.’
Joe shook his head. ‘No,’ he said. ‘I can’t let you do that.’
‘But I want to,’ Eve insisted. ‘I have the money in the bank, and—’
‘That’s for your house!’
‘The house can wait,’ Eve said, gently.
‘No.’ Joe shook his head again. ‘I can’t ask that of you.’
‘You’re not asking anything. I’m offering, and Sarah agreed it would help.
She wants to take the police to court to get disclosure of everything she’s asked for, and then there are the forensic tests, which she might get legal aid for, but there are still hoops to jump through with that, and then there’s the court transcript, which she needs if she’s going to find out exactly what the witnesses said at your trial, and she’d have to submit applications and fundraise and it could all take ages, Joe. This will speed everything up.’
‘It will cost thousands of pounds,’ Joe protested, concern clouding his features.
‘And even if they exonerate me, I might not be able to repay you. I might not get compensation. Not everybody does. In fact, hardly anyone does. To get compensation, Sarah would have to prove I didn’t kill Christy, not just that my conviction was unsafe.
She told me that right at the beginning. It was the first conversation we had.’
‘I know that. I don’t care about getting it back.
I care about you.’ Eve felt herself flush.
‘I’ve thought about nothing else for days, Joe, and it’s what I want.
I don’t want you to feel indebted to me or pressured in any way, and if things don’t work out between us and you find you don’t want to be with me, then that’s absolutely fine too, but I think there is something between us, and I am pretty sure you feel it too, and I think it could be something really good and I’d like the chance to find out – and I’d like that to happen sooner rather than later.
’ She stopped, running out of breath, out of words, and held his gaze.
He stiffened. ‘Eve, you must know how I feel about you. But I just can’t think about anything happening between us. Not right now. It’s all too much. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry if I’ve led you on, but I just can’t think straight at the moment. I just … can’t.’ He put his head in his hands.
Eve took a deep breath. This was all wrong. Joe had already made it clear that he was in no fit state mentally for a relationship and all she’d done was pile pressure on him.
‘No, it’s my fault,’ she said. ‘I shouldn’t have said all that. Of course you can’t think about us being together. It’s the wrong time. I get it.’
Joe looked up slowly, his eyes tired. ‘It’s not that I don’t want things to be different,’ he said.
‘What we did last Sunday was … well, it was lovely. Of course it was. But after you left, I started having flashbacks to the day I was arrested. I got worried. What if you’d gone to the police and accused me of raping you too? ’
‘Joe, I would never—’
‘I know, Eve,’ he said. ‘I know you wouldn’t. But the last time I was with a woman in that way, I was accused of doing something terrible to her. I was pulled off the street and thrown into prison, and it haunts me. It’s still haunting me.’
‘I’m sorry,’ Eve said, tears springing to her eyes.
Joe reached out a hand and held hers. ‘Eve, don’t cry. Please.’
‘It’s just that this is all so unfair.’
He nodded, his cheeks hollow. ‘I know. But it doesn’t change the fact that I’m not a good prospect.’
‘I understand, Joe. I really do. But please let me help.’
Joe hesitated. ‘How can I? How can I, when I can’t give you anything in return?’
‘I told you,’ Eve said. ‘It’s unconditional. No strings. It’s just money, Joe. It’s sitting in the bank doing nothing.’
‘But it’s for your house.’
‘The house can wait. I’m in no hurry. And anyway, it’s the wrong time to buy. I’ll probably get a better deal later in the year, and when I find something, you can give me a quote for an extension or a loft conversion. What do you say?’
A glimmer of hope shone in his eyes, but his voice cracked as he said, ‘I knew there was something special about you, the first time I saw you.’
Eve smiled. ‘Is that a yes?’
‘If you’ll let me work for free.’
‘Mates’ rates,’ she said.
He smiled back. ‘Mates it is.’