Chapter 55
“Me?” I squeaked. I couldn’t have heard him right. There was no way.
Caden nodded. “You. I’ve chosen you.”
I stared at him for what felt like an eternity, heart racing, and stomach feeling as if I were poised at the top of a rollercoaster. “You can’t choose me.”
“Oh, yes, I can,” he replied. “And I have.”
“But the Summer Court, the world—”
“Will be just fine.” He reached out, curling his fingers around my elbows. “Because you are my mortuus, and I’ve given you the Summer Kiss.”
“What does that have to do with it?” Tears blurred his face.
“Because you’re not entirely human any longer.
” He rose slowly as if trying not to startle me.
“You’re not fae, either. You have a piece of my soul inside you.
That places you above any fae my Court could offer me.
The Summer fae would not weaken, nor would the human world.
I would not be dethroned.” His thumbs slid along my elbows. “I would be whole.”
Confusion swamped me as a tiny kernel of something more powerful than hope formed.
Some fae knew I was Caden’s mortuus—Tanner and Luce.
I imagined Fabian knew, as did Tink. I didn’t think any of them would be particularly dishonest with me.
“Is this something well known? That your mortuus, no matter if they are fae or human, can be your Queen?”
“It’s not just the mortuus. It’s also the Summer Kiss,” he explained, his gaze questioning. “Why?”
“I…” I’d told no one about the Summer Kiss. Luce didn’t even know that. Neither did Tanner. Had Caden told Fabian? If so, he must’ve kept it from Tink because Tink would’ve told me. The tiny kernel grew, unfurling like a blossoming flower. “Are you…are you for real?”
“Why wouldn’t I be?” Caden dragged his hands up my arms.
My brain sort of shorted out. I could have him and the future I wanted so badly and not risk the entire world?
We could be together. Our child would have a mother and father who loved each other.
My legs started to tremble, and I jerked back from his hold.
“Why didn’t you tell me this when you told me you ended your engagement with Tatiana! ”
“Looking back, I realize I should have, but I figured you’d been through enough, and it seemed like a good idea to wait before I told you I planned to make you my wife. I figured after you had some time to heal, we’d talk,” he explained. “I didn’t expect anyone to go to you.”
My breath came in short, quick pants. What he was saying sounded reasonable. He’d been thinking of what I could handle given that I’d just been held—wait. “You…you want to marry me?”
His lips twitched. “To make you my Queen, I would have to marry you.”
“Is this a proposal?”
He grinned then, somehow looking boyish. “I had planned on doing something romantic.”
Feeling like I might faint, I pressed my palm to the center of my chest. “You’re not lying to me now, right?”
“I would not lie about this.” He lifted his hands, cupping my cheeks. I didn’t flinch. Everything that had happened with Aric was the furthest thing from my mind. “I would never lie to you about how I feel or our future. Never again, sunshine.”
“This isn’t…this isn’t a hallucination, is it?”
Anguish filled his gaze. “No, sunshine. This is real.”
I didn’t know what happened next.
It was like a seal deep inside me cracked wide open.
I tried to say his name, but all that came up was a deep, soul-shaking sob.
The tears I’d been fighting overwhelmed me.
Vaguely, I was aware of Caden gathering me in his arms, and then we were on the bed, him sitting with me in his lap, one arm wrapped tightly around me, a hand curled around the back of my head.
And I cried.
It was the ugly kind of crying that shook the entire body.
Whatever had been ripped open inside of me had been a Pandora’s box of emotions.
What spilled out of me was a mixture of the best and the worst of the storm.
Some of the tears that fell were for all the wounds Aric had caused, those inflicted years ago, the ones that had faded, and the ones that were never visible.
The death of my mother, the way I never felt truly valued by the Order, and even the loss of the father I’d never known fueled the sobs.
But there was a different side to the outpouring of emotion as well.
A wealth of relief and such potent happiness that all I could do was cry. And I never happy-cried.
But I was now because I didn’t have to watch the man I loved bind his life to someone else.
I wouldn’t have to walk away, knowing I would never feel the kind of love I had for him again, nor would I ever have to worry if I’d find someone who loved me as much as he did.
I didn’t have to hide our child from him.
He could be a part of the child’s life from the beginning.
We wouldn’t have that house with the white picket fence, but we would have each other.
We would have a future together. That realization made me cry even harder, and the whole time, Caden held me.
He whispered words to me that reminded me of music.
It was a language I couldn’t begin to understand.
Still, it soothed all the frayed edges until finally the tears subsided, and the tremors stopped.
There was so much I wanted to tell him as I lifted my head from his chest. There was so much I needed to tell him as I looked up and saw the concern in his gaze as he dragged his hand around to my cheek.
That I was pregnant. That he was about to become a father.
That I loved him. That I now believed in soulmates.
That the tears weren’t all bad. That happy couldn’t even begin to describe the hope, anticipation, excitement, and the hundred other emotions I currently felt.
But as Caden’s thumb dragged over my lower lip, I knew that if he felt one-tenth of the rawness swirling around inside me, now wasn’t the time for words.
Fire replaced the concern in his gaze, and the way his lips parted and his chest rose sharply against my hands was intentional.
Tension poured into the air around us, becoming a tangible third entity.
I imagined I could almost see the air heating and crackling.
A heavy ache settled in my breasts and then moved lower, between my thighs.
It was a deep, pulsing throb that I didn’t just welcome but reveled in because it was more than just primal physical attraction.
It was our love for one another manifesting into something that could not be denied.
Time for words would come later.
Closing the distance between us, I kissed Caden.
The touch of his lips against mine was a jolt to the system.
It was like brushing up against a live wire, lighting up the network of nerves all across my body.
I shuddered as the arm around me tightened, drawing me against the hot, hard length of his body.
The taste of him against my lips, on my tongue, was like ambrosia.
Every part of me became hyperaware of how his mouth felt against mine, his lips soft yet hard.
How he tasted like sunshine and summer against the tip of my tongue.
Giving in to the rising tide of sensations, I rocked my hips against him.
The thin leggings I wore were no barrier to the hardness pressing against the material of his jeans.
He skated his fingers through my hair, his hand balling in the loose strands.
A deep, growling sound radiated out from the back of his throat and rumbled through me.
The tips of my breasts tingled, and the kiss went deeper as he managed to hold me even tighter.
A moan curled its way out of my throat as he shifted under me, lining his hips up perfectly with mine.
My fingers dug into his shirt as my pulse became a heady thrum.
I almost whimpered as Caden broke the kiss, pulling back as his gaze roamed over my face. I didn’t care what I looked like after having cried for the Lord knew how long, because I realized he didn’t see the puffy eyes or tear-streaked cheeks or the remnants of the fading bruises and healing cuts.
He saw me.
Only me.
“Are you sure?” he whispered, his gaze searching mine intently. “Because we can do everything, or we don’t have to do anything. I would be happy to just hold you, to just kiss and play, Brighton. I’m satisfied with you being in my arms.”
Fresh tears pricked my eyes, but I didn’t worry if they fell or not. “That is why I’m sure.” His willingness to wait, to do nothing or anything was why I knew I was ready, why it wasn’t too soon after everything that’d happened. “I need you, Caden. Make love to me. Please?”
“You never have to say please. Ever.” Cradling my cheeks in his hands, he shuddered against me. “All that I am. All that I have. It’s yours. I’m yours.”
Caden kissed me then, and oh God, no one—no one—kissed like him.
His mouth moved over mine like he was claiming every hidden part of my heart and soul.
My shirt came off. Then his. We stood, our mouths and hands skimming over every inch of exposed skin.
His fingers gripped the band of my leggings, tugging them down, along with the panties I wore underneath.
I reached for the button on his jeans, hands trembling as I then worked at the zipper.
Off went his pants, and then he eased down the tight, black boxer briefs he had on, freeing the rigid length of his cock.
Caden was…he was beautiful. Every part of him, from the broad expanse of his chest and the tightly rolled muscles of his stomach, to the proud jut of his arousal.
So distracted by the sight of him, I hadn’t even noticed that he’d unclasped my bra until his mouth closed over one nipple. I cried out, reaching for those silky strands of hair, but he dropped to his knees in front of me.