29. RJ
RJ
“ L et us through, we’re family,” I hear my sister shout as the door to my room swings open.
Raven strolls over to my bed, her expression unreadable. Is she mad? Worried?
Lowering my oxygen mask, my voice is raspy as I try to speak. “I’m fine.”
She leans over me, tugging me into a hug. It’s out of character for her, and I awkwardly lean up so she can wrap her arms around my shoulders as I pat her back.
Movement behind her catches my attention, and I lock eyes with Summer. “I love her, Raven. I’ve always loved her, and there’s nothing you can say that will make me walk away from her again.” My words are meant for Summer even though I’m speaking to my sister.
Raven stands. “Fucking hell, you’re dramatic. And an idiot. I’m not asking you to walk away from her. And what do you mean ‘again’?”
“After you dared us to kiss, we snuck off together for about a week after?—”
“I know.”
My mouth drops open, and I shut it quickly, half afraid she’d stick her fingers in there to fuck with me. She’s done it before. “You knew?”
“Of course I did. You were hiding your boners with your backpack. And doing a piss-poor job of it.”
“You told me that I was the only family you had left, and if I didn’t want to walk home from school, I needed to pull my head out of my ass and walk away from whatever kept making me late.
We’d just found out that Dad died, and it felt like you were reminding me that you were the only family I had left.
So I did. I walked away from Summer, and I’ve regretted that decision every day of my life. ”
She punches me in the arm. Not hard, but enough to leave a sting. “Ow.”
“Don’t be a baby.” She smirks, and I stick my tongue out at her.
“I swear, you’re so fucking brilliant about so much, but so dumb when it comes to women.
I was mad you kept making me late. I wanted you to stop making me late.
I wanted you to walk out of the building on time, away from the person who was making you late.
That was it. I never meant you needed to walk away from her forever or dump her.
You two could have been all kissy and gross on your own time.
I just wanted to leave on time so I could make it to my job. ”
A lead weight sinks in my gut. “I’m an idiot.”
A throat clears behind her, and Summer crosses her arms over her body. There’s a nervousness in her movement that sets off alarm bells, and I extend my arms reaching for her.
She timidly walks over to the opposite side of the bed.
“I’ll give you two some privacy.” Raven slips out of the room, but I can’t take my eyes off of Summer. Has she been crying?
“Fuck, darlin’, what’s wrong? Did Raven say something to you?”
She shakes her head. “No. I mean, we talked about everything. I’m so sorry for the way I reacted when she came over.
I’d been rehearsing this speech for her in my head for weeks since we’d been home, but as soon as I saw her, I panicked.
My emotions have been all over the place lately, and all my words came out wrong. And I could tell you were upset.”
I grab her hand, squeezing it as if I could imbue her with my strength, but I’m zapped, and it doesn’t feel like enough. “If I’m being honest, I was hurt. It felt like you were embarrassed by me as if I was something you were hiding. And I think my ego got the better of me. I’m sorry.”
“You have every right to feel that way, and I’m sorry for the way I reacted. It’s just… my mind has been so scattered the past few days because of the pregnancy.”
“ You’re pregnant?” I search her face, silently pleading for her confirmation.
She nods.
Relief floods my senses. “Oh, thank fuck.”
“I’m sorry, what?”
“I found a test when I was dumping the trash out earlier. It was in Sophie’s bathroom, and I thought it was hers.” Her words suddenly hit me, and I’m filled with warmth. “Wait. You’re pregnant. With my baby. We’re having a baby?”
“I hope so. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you right away.
I hid the test in Sophie’s trash can because I was freaked out.
Part of me didn’t want to upset you. I wasn’t sure if you wanted more kids.
And with my history of miscarrying, I didn’t want to get your hopes up in case it didn’t stick.
I didn’t want to disappoint you either way, and that’s why I panicked when I saw Raven. ”
“Oh Summer, come here.” I shift on the bed as she climbs in next to me. “You could never disappoint me. I’ll be here no matter what. I want whatever you want. And regardless of how everything turns out, I’ll be by your side.”
My heart rate evens out at her proximity. I’ve wanted this woman my entire life, and now she’s having my child. Even though we didn’t plan it, I’m overwhelmed with joy.
She nods against my chest as she inhales a stuttering breath.
“I didn’t want you to feel like you were stuck with me.”
“Darlin’ I’ve been stuck to you since our first kiss, I’m just sorry it took me so long to act on it. And I would stick with you and the family we build forever.”
I wrap my arms around her tighter, inhaling her sweet scent, before I blow out a relieved breath. “Fuck, I’m just glad my daughter’s not pregnant.” She silently chuckles against me.
Her fingers rest on my chest and I cover her hand with mine. “I’m glad you’re okay.”
“Me too.” I press a kiss to her hairline.
“Are you going to get in trouble?”
A heavy sigh escapes me. “Suspended without pay for a few days while they investigate. Since it’s my first offense, it’s unlikely I’ll be fired, but I’ll be put through a lot more training and will probably be doing administrative tasks for a while.”
“What were you thinking? You could’ve been hurt or killed.”
“It was dumb and reckless, I know, but you’ve lost so much, I couldn’t stand the thought of you losing anything else, and since we’ve been home, going back and forth between our houses, I knew there were items you’d want me to save. Your book babies, the kids’ baby books, the photo albums.”
Her head tilts and I stare into pools of blue, her eyes holding mine like they don’t want to let go.
“You’re more important to me. I need you to be safe.
For me. For us.” My hand slips down to her stomach as though I could feel our child there.
She’s way too early to even have a bump, but I’m already picturing our future together.
“This is where I feel safe. With you in my arms.” I press a kiss to her forehead. “I love you, Summer.”
“I love you too.”
“Are you moving in now?”
She laughs. “Don’t think I have much of a choice.”
“Good. I want to spend every day like this. Every summer. Every holiday.”
“Once the kids get back, you may change your mind about that.” She smiles, and I squeeze her tighter.
“Nope. I can’t wait to show them their new home. And take them hiking, camping, all that shit.”
“You better watch your language, or Logan will bankrupt you.”
“Don’t worry. I have a plan.”