Chapter 17
Chapter Seventeen
T he protein bar tasted like cardboard. Brielle paused, then continued her chewing. Yeah…cardboard was the best description she could come up with. Although, that might be alright because she wasn’t sure her stomach could handle actual food right now.
It had been hours since her fight with Ryan in the van, and Brielle was still unsettled. Mostly because she knew he wasn’t going to let things go. He’d said they were going to hash it out, and the conviction in his tone was like steel.
She couldn’t blame him. There were so many things they’d never talked about, and then Brielle had run away from him right after saying they were going to give things a try. What their discussion would lead to, however, was anyone’s guess, since Brielle, herself, wasn’t sure how it all fit together.
“He’s here in five!” Henry shouted, his phone to his ear.
Ryan came over, shaking out his legs and zipping up a jacket. “I’m ready.”
Brielle kept her eyes down while everyone else was giving him good luck high fives .
“Bri,” Levi hissed. “Don’t leave a guy hanging like that!”
Brielle looked up and started when she saw Ryan standing in front of her with his hand out.
He wiggled it. “It’s clean, and I don’t have much time.”
Brielle held back a scowl, but barely. “Right.” She gave him the hand slap he was looking for. “Good luck.”
Ryan’s face went blank, and he gave a curt nod. “See you in a couple hours.”
Brielle groaned internally. At least he was only referring to a tradeoff. She’d barely see him, and there definitely wouldn’t be any chance for them to speak to each other because she’d be taking off. Her heart was torn in too many directions, and she desperately just wanted a break from it all. Ryan was mad. She was mad. Sparky was gone. Aurora was either lying or helping Brielle see a huge mistake…it was too much.
She shifted her already sore shoulders and wished she’d remembered to pack a new shirt. Hers was damp and sweaty, and her long run was the one tonight.
“Get a nap,” Henry said, dangling the car keys in front of her. “We’ll head out in a few minutes, but you should get a little sleep before you start the next leg.”
Brielle nodded, knowing she shouldn’t argue. She had the hardest run of the race, the one that took her through the long wee hours of morning. She’d finish a full marathon by the time she met up with the next teammate tomorrow morning.
Walking back to the van, she opened the door and curled up on the seat. She sighed and grabbed one of the extra blankets from the front seat. She curled into it and tried to rest, but her mind was still racing at a hundred miles an hour.
Her body was tired but wired, and her brain was the same. So far they were keeping a good pace in the race, but the storm was still threatening and there were concerns about it hitting hard during her run, not to mention Brielle was still upset about Ryan and Aurora.
“Knock, knock.” Elyse opened the van door and climbed inside. “ I know I should probably let you sleep, but after hearing about your wonderful little fight this morning, I figured you probably wouldn’t be resting anyway.”
Brielle snorted and sat up. “You could say that.”
Elyse was sitting in the front passenger seat, and she twisted. “What’s up between the two of you? I didn’t realize you were dating.”
“We’re not,” Brielle assured her teammate. “But…we knew each other in high school.”
“And?” Elyse pushed. “There’s either a crazy story from when you were teenagers, or something else has happened.”
Brielle sighed, pulled the blanket tighter around her and slouched. “It’s kind of a mess, and I'm not sure I really want to talk about it.”
“Sounds like you need to talk to someone,” Elyse pushed. “At this point it’s not just affecting you, it’s affecting the team.”
“You’re right. I’m sorry.” Brielle studied the floor. She wasn’t the type to open up, which was why it had been so unusual for her to give into Ryan at his apartment. It had felt good, so so good, but it was all such a mess. She wanted to trust him, but how could she? After hearing everything Aurora told her? Or was it Aurora lying? Ugh… how was she supposed to know? High school was years ago, and both parties said they were telling the truth.
“You know…” Elyse said carefully. “If you’re mad about something that happened when you guys were younger, you might want to consider that he’s not the same person he was as a stupid teenage boy.”
Brielle looked up. “What makes you say that? I know guys still playing video games in their mother’s basements.”
“Was Ryan the type of guy to do that?”
Brielle shrugged. “No. We ran cross country and track together.”
“And?”
“And nothing. He usually won in the long distance, but I was faster at sprinting.”
“And let me guess, you reveled in it,” Elyse said with a low laugh .
Brielle smiled a little. “You might say that.”
Elyse nodded. “You and I are a little too much alike, Bri.” Elyse faced front. “But take it from someone who’s never had a serious relationship. Whatever is between Ryan and you? Think twice before throwing it away.”
“There’s nothing there,” Brielle automatically replied.
Elyse looked back. “Maybe not, but from the sparks I keep hearing about…there could be.”
Brielle didn’t speak. She wasn’t sure why, but the thought of ending up just like Elyse bothered her a little. Elyse was great. Tough, a leader, she got things done. She had a successful career and a good education.
But she’s also alone.
Brielle grimaced as the words floated through her brain. Was that where she was headed? If she kept pushing people, like Ryan, away, would she spend her entire life alone?
But someone’s lying! I just can’t figure out who.
The argument sat heavy in Brielle’s stomach. The heartbreak in high school had been crushing. Brielle hadn’t been ready for it, and it had broken her in ways she didn’t know she could break.
But this wasn’t high school, and Ryan had been really kind when she’d been in his office. He’d taken care of her and Sparky personally, instead of handing her off to an assistant, which he totally had the right to do.
He’d welcomed her into his home to deliver bad news so it wasn’t so hard to deal with and then treated her like the most precious person on Earth as he helped her through Sparky’s death. Would a man that kind and patient lie to her about their past?
Groaning, Brielle leaned forward and put her face into her hands. Why was it all so complicated? Why couldn’t life be simple? What was she supposed to believe?
“Focus on the race,” Elyse said softly from the front, her voice slightly drowsy. “Focus on getting through the storm, and then when you’re thinking clearly, hash it all out. No one makes good decisions when their emotions are compromised.”
Brielle started to nod, but Elyse wasn’t done.
“I should know,” she whispered, almost as if she didn’t want Brielle to hear.
Brielle felt a rush of compassion hit her for the woman sitting just out of reach. It was clear that Elyse had been through more than anyone knew.
Just like you…and maybe…just like Ryan.
Brielle swallowed hard, her fortitude flickering like a candle in a hurricane. She’d follow Elyse’s advice, which is exactly how Brielle had started the day. Get through the race, then figure it out. If Ryan was telling the truth, Brielle would owe him a huge apology. If Aurora was lying…then Brielle would have to walk away.
What would that mean for Brielle’s heart? Well…that was something she simply wasn’t ready to acknowledge.
Ryan wiped the rain out of his eyes and cursed when he hit another mud patch. The storm had gotten completely out of control, and he wished they’d call off the race. He kept checking his phone, hoping someone would let him know that it was over.
This had to be, without a doubt, the most miserable experience of his life.
He was drenched, cold, tired and soaked to the bone. This was the longest leg he was running, and he knew that when Brielle took over, hers would be almost twice as long. I take it back. Having Brielle walk away from me again was the most miserable experience of my life. This is a close second.
He shook his head and spit out the rainwater to the side. He couldn’t imagine her taking on an entire marathon in this weather. If they were running strictly on highway, it wouldn’t be as bad, but the trail had gotten slick and dangerous and his fear ramped up every time he slipped.
He glanced at his watch and noted that he was down to his last half mile, which was good because his achilles was about to snap and his knee was acting personally offended that Ryan had dared put it through this much exercise without a longer training regime.
“Almost there,” he muttered to himself. “Almost there.” A few minutes later, the lights of the camp were within sight, and his energy levels responded accordingly.
He peered through the darkness, seeing bodies waiting at the finish line and knew that one of them would be Brielle. The headlamp he wore bounced,and he was unable to get a good look at who was who.
“Come on, Ryan!” a feminine voice shouted. “Almost there!”
Ryan nodded, still huffing and puffing. He wasn’t sure if it was Brielle shouting or not, but he hoped it was. He hoped that while he was gone she’d had the opportunity to calm down about whatever had made her mad in the first place.
His tongue landed between his teeth when he slipped on yet another puddle and the mud shifted under his weight. “Stupid,” he grumbled, getting his plodding jog back under control.
“You got it, Ryan!” a male voice this time, much more enthusiastic than the one before.
Almost…almost… Ryan could see them now. He was close enough that he could see the crowd of his team waiting, Brielle was half turned, her face grim in the shadows of his lamp, while keeping her own headlamp angled away from his face.
He fiddled with his wrist, pulling the slap bracelet off, but his hands were shaking too hard to be of much use, and the rain was making it far too slick.
“I got it.” Henry’s calm and collected voice was helpful as Ryan worked too hard to pull oxygen into his lungs. His large hands went over Ryan’s, and he pulled the bracelet off, slipping it onto Brielle’s slim wrist. “Off you go, Bri. You got it.”
Ryan watched her, his chest heaving. “Be…careful…” he panted, then turned and spit out more rainwater.
Brielle’s red brows were pulled together, and she started and stopped several times. “Are you okay?” she finally asked.
Ryan nodded and waved her on. “I’m fine. Just beat.” His stupid heart gave a stuttered beat at the concern in her tone.
She hesitated but nodded in return and finally turned, raising a hand when her teammates called out their encouragement.
Ryan watched her figure disappear into the dark. His stomach sank, and he hated the feeling of letting her go. She was going to be on trail for almost all of it. No back up, no pacer, no vehicle that could check on her.
A sudden burst of fear nearly had him starting to run after her and he took a couple of steps before he thought better of it, but Levi grabbed his arm.
“I got ya,” he shouted over the downpour. “Let’s get you warmed up, huh? There’s hot chocolate and a tent to dry off in.”
Ryan didn’t want to move. Something was wrong. His gut was churning and not from the run, but the exhaustion running through his body had him second guessing his hunch. “Do you think she’s going to be okay?” he asked, his voice not nearly as strong as Levi’s had been.
“Bri?” Levi scoffed. “Of course. She’s the strongest of us all.” He brought his head a little closer. “But don’t tell Elyse I said that. She’d take me down for sure.”
Ryan just nodded, not laughing at the joke. Brielle was strong, but…He glanced at the sky, blinking rapidly against the rain as it hit his face. Something just didn’t feel right. The rain seemed to be getting heavier, and Ryan knew from experience that the trail was muddy and dangerous.
“Come on, man. She’ll be fine.” Levi tried, once again to usher Ryan away from the end line.
Ryan let him, his legs shaking a little from the cold. He really was a mess, it was no wonder Brielle looked at him with worry. He couldn’t even imagine what monster he resembled currently.
“Right here.”
The rain finally stopped as Levi pulled him under a tarp.
“Let’s get that trench off.”
Ryan nearly sighed in relief when his heavy rain coat was lifted from his shoulders. He hadn’t realized just how heavy it had become as the rain bore down on him. That fear for Brielle hit him again, and Ryan’s head snapped in her direction.
Just as he did, thunder began to build into a heavy rumble, and lightning lit the sky like a thousand city lights.
“Ah, geez,” Levi grumbled. “That’s not good.”
“She shouldn’t be out in this,” Ryan muttered, not speaking to anyone in particular. “We should go get her.”
“She has her phone,” Levi assured Ryan. “If she needs help, she’ll let us know.”
Ryan didn’t respond, but when the thunder crashed again, his fear jumped another notch.
“Guys!” Henry came out of the tent, holding a cell phone. “We need to stop Bri. They’re canceling the race. The lightning is getting too close to be safe, and it’s supposed to be right overhead within a half hour or so.”
I knew it. Ryan started to move, but Levi intercepted him.
“Whoa, buddy,” his vet tech said. “Hang on. We’ll give her a call.” Levi jutted his chin at Henry, who nodded quickly.
“Hang on.” Henry punched a few buttons and put the phone to his ear.
Ryan shivered as they listened to the phone on the other side begin to ring. Only moments later the whole group froze when a pop song rang through the air.
All eyes, wide with horror, turned toward the tent where Elyse emerged, holding a bright blue cell phone with a dog on the case. “Uh, guys?” She wiggled it in the air.
A word that had never slipped from Ryan’s mouth before, came shooting out, surprising him as well as his companions. He should never have let her go, but rather than dwell on it, Ryan’s body jumped into action.
Grabbing his trench, he burst out from under the tarp and threw the coat over his head. He was already drenched. There was no point in sending anyone else, and Ryan ignored the shouts behind him. He knew none of them were ready to run as most had been in recovery shoes and several of the team members were probably napping in the van or the tent.
His legs burned and screamed with the pace he took off at, but there was no way Ryan was leaving Brielle on her own, and he knew he’d have to push himself if he had any chance of catching up with her.
She was one of the strongest runners they had, and she had a ten minute head start. Really, what he needed right now more than anything…was a miracle.