Chapter Fifty-One
Avari
It took only seconds for Alec’s shadows to portal us across hundreds, if not thousands, of miles.
Seconds that stretched like hours as I waited in trepidation to see him on the other side.
Seconds until I would have to face the man who had wounded my heart more than anyone ever had before.
A quick squeeze of my arm, River’s mother’s silent gesture of appreciation, served as a bitter reminder of the things at stake.
I reminded myself this wasn’t a social visit; I was doing this for the greater good. Who knew what my wretched mother had started plotting now that she had wrapped her hands around our ancient grimoire? And though I hated the situation, the silver lining was the former queen’s return.
We landed in the foyer where I had once been attacked by one of his soldiers. Where I still smelled blood dripping from his weapons. But the incident held no significance anymore.
Nothing hurt me more than the realisation of what River had done, how he had traded me off without a care. I replayed it in my mind again and again. He had judged me harshly for “wanting” to go back to Ortensia, painting me as foolish and disloyal. But when it suited him, he passed me off anyway.
‘Maddie!’ River’s mother shouted, running up to the chief of staff, who looked as though she had seen a ghost. The women engulfed each other in a lasting hug.
With eyes shining with tears and resolve, she rushed us to the conference room on the ground floor and left to fetch the rest of the family.
Standing on the sidelines, I decided to watch from afar; I needed space to breathe.
The King
The moment she set foot in the castle, the ground trembled beneath me. The whole realm had shifted off its axis when she left, and now it was righting itself again.
Her essence of roses, peaches, and sunshine beckoned me to the ground floor. I leapt from my chair, scattering documents across the desk as I ran like my life depended on it. It did. Everything good in me left with her.
For the past fortnight I’d spent every waking minute searching for a sign that she was alive and a way to bring her home.
How could I have let it happen?
That idiot took her from me, but the fault was mine. I signed her away the very day I met her. How could I have been so blind?
By the time I reached the stairs, my brothers were already there, pale-faced, their boots thundering ahead of me as we sprinted for the conference room.
And then I stopped breathing. My mother stood there.
Alive.
Chills rippled down my body as I took in the scene before me. It was really her, her scent the same as I remembered. Instinct screamed to ask questions, to demand answers, but none of that mattered at the moment.
I pulled her into my arms, buried my face against her neck, inhaled that familiar scent and still couldn’t believe it was real.
She was dead. Father had claimed so. Yet here she was, heart beating, alive and whole.
Father yanked her from my hold, crushing her to him, and I couldn’t blame him. Across the room another heartbeat drew me in—the girl glaring at me like she wished I would burn.
Our reunion wouldn’t be as loving.
I had betrayed her, and it was unforgivable. She shouldn’t forgive me; I didn’t deserve it, but I needed her like I needed air. Her laugh, her sarcasm, the way she looked at me like I wasn’t the monster I am… I would beg until my knees bled if it meant she would look at me again.
Someone like her deserved someone good and selfless. That wasn’t me. But no one had ever hollowed me out the way her absence did.
Fears of the worst battered me every single day. I never even asked why they wanted her; it hadn’t been my concern at the time.
But as she stood there, healthy and radiant, I wanted to drop to my knees and kiss the soil beneath her feet for keeping her safe. I would give my thanks to the universe if it listened.
And when her sinful eyes finally met mine, instinct took over. I had to be near my mate.
Avari
Pressing a hand to her chest, River’s mother collapsed as one after another barged into the room. A knot in my stomach unravelled at the sight of their reunion. Their soft cries and longing embraces only quivered once the former King of Fogoya rushed to her side and pulled her to himself.
Tears slid down Michael’s and Blaze’s faces as their father kept breathing her in, pressing her into him hard enough that it looked as though they might fuse together.
Though Blaze still wore a pendant with the cleansing stone, he had been cured. Another heart-warming piece of information that did nothing to disturb the chill that threatened to take me down.
The freezing sensation only deepened the moment River’s eyes turned to me.
He looked older. There were creases under his eyes I hadn’t noticed before. Despite the anger twisting in my chest, a part of me ached for him. The usual confidence was nowhere in sight, and his steps were unsteady as he neared the corner where I leaned against a cupboard.
Blinking rapidly, he whispered, ‘You’re here.’
‘Yes. I know it’s uncanny for an object to return once it’s been traded off. Don’t worry, I’m only here for a moment,’ I barked, ignoring the confused glares from his brothers.
‘Please… let me explain,’ he begged, his lips trembling and voice breaking. ‘It wasn’t like that. Please.’
‘Did you not exchange me for a cleanse for your brother?’ The question landed us the attention of everyone in the room. And though it felt like the walls were closing in, I needed to speak my mind.
‘I didn’t know you back then. I tried to track them down to break it off.’ River gestured towards my family, who stood on the other side and watched intently. ‘You have to believe me, I would never have traded you for anything if I’d known who you were back then.’
‘What is that supposed to mean?’ I demanded, anger pushing past the tipping point. ‘A witch to kill, or a halfling to possess?’
Flinching, the king insisted, ‘Neither. Please, Ava, can we just speak privately?’
Part of me wanted to hear him. The smarter part didn’t. ‘No, River. We need to use your portal. Please let us.’
‘I’ll let you do anything you want if you just let me explain.’ He sighed heavily, hope shimmering deep in his darkened eyes.
There was no point. ‘We don’t have to do this. I know why you did it. There’s nothing to explain.’
‘There’s so much to explain I don’t even know whether I can put it all into words, Ava. You felt it too,’ he protested, leaning closer. His energy hovered between us, ready but sensing my withdrawal.
I wouldn’t let him have it, not after what he had done. ‘What I felt strongest was the realisation that you had been lying to me the whole time.’
‘No, that’s not true. I hid the fact that I made a deal with Alexander, but our bond is real. I never pretended or lied about that.' His voice cracked, and he looked disturbingly hollow.
‘There’s nothing between us, River. It vanished the second his shadows whisked me away into their court. You didn’t even have the decency to ask why they wanted me.’
‘It’s not fair, Ava. You were just a witch to me then.’
‘And what am I now, your mate?’ I rasped, my tone ruthless enough to make him recoil. ‘That’s what your mum thinks anyway.’
River looked back at the woman, still in his father’s embrace, and she looked deeply apologetic.
‘It wasn’t hers to share,’ he whispered, his posture slumped under the assault of emotions.
Grimacing, I pointed out, ‘So you do think that. I’m a halfling. I don’t have a mate.’
‘It’s not like that, Ava. Please, just… it’s not how I wanted you to find out. I tried to put a stop to this deal; I really did. Ever since the curse almost killed you, I did everything I could.’
Was that when it started? ‘Is that how long you’ve been assuming that I’m yours?’
‘It’s not an assumption. I know.’ Tears welled in his eyes as he released his flames and outstretched his hand.
It was what I had once dreamed of—the warm connection of our essences to soothe the nerves and problems of the world.
But it was a bittersweet memory, and I would not allow myself such vulnerability anymore.
River’s jaw clenched as I turned to glance through the window instead, thinking about my dragon to calm my raging heart and the thrashing fire that didn’t comprehend my apprehension.
A stray tear slipped down his cheek as he lowered his hand.
‘It's okay if you hate me. I hate myself too.’ His voice broke.
‘There are so many things I regret, but this...
this was the worst of them. You have to know I'll never forgive myself.
These past weeks, every time I wondered whether you were safe, death would've been a mercy compared to not knowing.’
He drew an unsteady breath, his hands wringing together as though he couldn't stop them from trembling. ‘You are like the sun to me. Even though I've only known you for weeks, without you, I'm blinded by darkness.’
His gaze searched mine, raw and pleading. ‘I told you mates were the other half of our souls. For decades, mine felt like it had withered away. Then you came along, and every smile you gave tugged at what was left of it, urging it to grow... to heal. I didn't know that was possible.’
His fingers clenched together. ‘I know you have feelings for me too. All I'm asking... is that you let me earn my way back into your life.’
Words deserted me. Even breathing felt like betrayal. ‘I don’t know what to say to you, River.’
He choked. ‘You don’t have to say anything; just let me prove to you that I’m not a monster.’
The emotional turmoil, not to mention the gasping audience, felt like too much.
I didn’t want to continue our intimate dialogue any longer, regretting my decision to stay instead of demanding privacy.
‘River, we need to get to Ortensia. My mother stole a dangerous grimoire from my father; we need to get it back.’
A question flashed in his eyes. ‘Your father?’
It reminded me that he really didn’t know much about them or the Isles. ‘Yes, the Lord of the Shadow Isles is my father. Alec is my brother, and the grey-haired one is my sister.’
River's and his family’s assessing glances turned to my family members. Miriam, obviously as uncomfortable as I was in social situations, sent an awkward wave.
Composing himself, River declared, ‘Your mother has been becoming more unhinged lately. I’ll come with you, we can take my battalion with us.’
‘That would serve as a formal declaration of war. We’re not doing that,’ I refused, unwilling to create even more political problems.
He wouldn’t let it go. ‘You can’t just go there on your own. It’s not safe. At least let me come with you.’
‘You’re a king. She can treat that as a declaration of war too,’ I reminded him, knowing he was aware.
‘I don’t care.’
And for once, I believed him.