Chapter Twenty-Nine
Avari
My itchy eyes begged for more sleep as I tore the duvet off and jumped out of bed. The alarm blasted its melody from the faraway cupboard, where I left it last night fearing that otherwise no force in our realm could make me get up.
‘Are you ready?’ Miriam asked from behind the door. She sounded much too cheerful for this early in the morning.
‘Just come in,’ I muttered, putting thick socks on my feet as the door opened. Her eyebrows set as if something disturbed her.
Already dressed and carrying her own little leather backpack, she took a seat next to me. ‘Is it the nightmares?’
I looked at her. ‘What about them?’
‘You look like you haven’t slept in a decade, Ava.’
I snorted before jumping off once more to choose boots that would cover my ankles. ‘Way to boost a girl’s self-esteem. Though it’s a fair assumption.’
She wouldn’t let go. ‘So what is it then?’
‘I’m just busy. The search takes time and I also train with Isaac—’
‘How’s that going? Is he giving you trouble?’
My eyebrows raised. ‘Isaac? No. He’s more of a friend than a tutor lately. I keep burdening him with my problems.’
My grey-haired sister followed me into the wardrobe, silent as a shadow.
Coming up from behind me, she began braiding my hair, and I forced myself not to show the confusion on my face.
It was unlike her to invade my personal space apart from that one incident when she got drunk. Where would it lead?
Continuing her work in silence, the slightly ticklish sensation of her fingers on my scalp made me close my eyes. ‘And how does your mate feel about this friendship?’
I was taken aback. ‘He doesn’t get a say in this. Would you let your mate meddle like that?’
‘I’m not saying you shouldn’t have male friends,’ she said quickly, defending herself. ‘I’m just interested in what he thinks. He seems pretty head over heels for you.’
I swallowed. ‘He doesn’t know about Isaac, I mean… not the friendship part.’
Miriam chuckled. 'Oh, he knows. He just doesn’t know who he is.’
I turned to face her. ‘What are you talking about?’
Slightly uncomfortable, she kept my head straight as she gathered more hair into the braid. ‘You’re spending a lot of time with him; his scent rubs off on you.’
Shit. ‘He asked if I was sleeping with someone.’
She stilled, her hand stuck in hair near my scalp. ‘Who did?’
‘River,’ I said, looking back to how on edge he was.
‘Your king?’ she asked, pretending not to know his name. I knew she heard it when we had arrived in the Fogoyan court to use their portal. ‘Yeah, scents that linger don’t usually come from reading books together, if you get my gist.’
That explained a lot.
‘Well, it’s not like he gets to dictate my life,’ I whispered, considering how damaged our relationship had become. There were parts of my life he no longer had access to.
Her face fell slightly, and I regretted my sour attitude. ‘Of course not. Though he is going to think we are depriving you of sleep.’
‘Some of you are, to be honest.' I didn’t hide the tinge of annoyance that clung to me and my tone.
‘Alec with his nightmare of a mate?’ she asked, snorting. ‘You’re a witch; why don’t you just soundproof the room?’
Silly idea. ‘Because I want to be able to hear everything else that happens. What if we get attacked or get a visitor? Even if you knock on my door, I wouldn’t hear it.’
‘We won’t get attacked. But all of your other points are fair; I wouldn’t want complete silence in my bedroom either. Even if they’re starting to drive me crazy too. A sigh ripped out of her just as she pulled a hair tie from around her wrist to finish her work of art.
It wasn’t a regular braid like the protective one I sometimes wore to bed; this one was as complex as she was. It started at my crown, pulling tight along my scalp instead of just the length. ‘Is there anything you can’t do, Miriam?’
‘I’m a horrific cook, or that’s what I’ve been told.’ Her laughter eased the atmosphere as the bright red of her eyes glinted with pride. ‘Do you like your hair?’
‘I love it. Where did you learn that?’ I asked just before a loud thud followed by Willow’s irritated voice carried through the corridor. ‘We’re not dealing with that. Let’s go.’
‘Wasn’t planning on checking up on them even if they asked.' Miriam covered us in her shadows before momentarily relocating to Fogoyan Court's foyer.
As always, the place had a troubling way of making me nostalgic, bringing back all the good times I’d experienced here. But there were bad ones too.
Making our way up the stairs to River’s office, I wondered whether it would be too much to ask her to jump us outside it.
I quickly realised she might be uncomfortable travelling unseen through a foreign castle, so I let the thought go.
It was a ridiculous thing to ask anyway.
Mere hours from now, I’d be setting off on an hours-long hike through the woods or Gods knew what kind of terrain, so I should just suck it up.
Soon we found Michael standing in the entrance to the main library, leaning against the doorframe with a book in hand while River stood opposite, typing away on his phone.
Miriam snorted, more of an instinctual reaction than a desire to draw attention to herself. When I looked at her, she shook her head in disbelief. ‘You think he’s pretending he can read?’
‘Miriam!’ I scolded her and failed to contain my chortle.
‘Lovely to see you too, Mabel.’ Michael closed the book with a thud and walked across the hall to hug me, then whispered in my ear, ‘Rescue me, Ava. That sister of yours is seriously mean.’
‘Spare me your tears, boy,’ she said, tensing a little.
‘You see what I mean?’ he asked, his eyes locked on her, tracking her movements like the spy he was. ‘It’s like she wants me to prove I am a man. Please ask her what she has in mind for me. I’m happy to comply.’
Standing between them felt like I was intruding on something that should be dealt with privately. Yet nosy as I was, I couldn’t bring myself to move.
‘Ava,’ Miriam turned toward me. ‘How about you ask your mate’s little brother if he needs me to read that book for him?. At least then he might be able to understand it.’
Michael’s whole face beamed at her comeback. Eyes glinting with something slightly darker, I already knew she backed herself into a corner.
‘Like a bedtime story?’ he purred, inching closer. ‘Will you also tuck me in, Minerva?’
I found their dynamic entertaining. Casting a quick glance to River, it was clear that so did he.
My grey-haired sister tapped her manicured fingers against the wall, looking like a goddess ready to smite him. ‘Do you also need me to feed you supper like a good little baby?’
‘It depends on what’s on the menu, Miriam.' He stepped closer, and for just a second I thought she might have blushed.
‘Michael, tell me, boy—do you sleep well?’ she asked innocently, closing the distance between them in a single step.
Her breathtaking eyes twinkled with something I hadn’t seen before. There was a surge of something beneath the surface, something she usually kept on a tight leash, now straining to break free.
His gaze locked onto hers, as if he couldn’t tear himself away, before he quickly masked it with a smug smirk. ‘I’d be willing to bet I’d sleep better with you next to me, if that’s where you’re going with this.’
In a movement so swift I barely registered it, she slid a long fingernail beneath his chin, drawing a bead of blood. It gathered at the tip before she licked it clean and backed away.
‘More like drowning your dreams in nightmares. I’ll enjoy your screams.’
He diminished the distance she just created in a couple of hurried steps.
‘As will I yours, though my plans for the circumstances are slightly more relaxed. Perhaps we test my way first,’ he snickered at her serious expression, masking a small shiver that worked its way up his shoulders.
It was intense, I had enough.
I made my way over to River, who was still leaning against the wall. His eyes searched my face, and just as he opened his mouth, he closed it again and lowered his gaze to the floor.
‘What is it?’
The melancholy in his eyes made my heart clench. ‘Nothing. I’m glad to see you.’
‘Don’t make me think about this for the rest of the day. My mind goes straight to the worst scenarios,’ I explained. ‘Please.’
‘There is nothing to worry about, Ava,’ River assured me, rubbing his arm in a self-soothing gesture. ‘I was going to ask for a hug too, but I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable.’
‘Oh.’
He bit his lip, and momentarily his amber eyes darkened from pools of vibrant dusk to all-encompassing night. A night I wouldn’t mind getting lost in. The word platonic rang in my mind as my core clenched, wanting him anyway.
‘I’d like that,’ I said. My breath caught before I could stop it.
River’s eyes widened before he covered my body with his, his fervent power slamming against me, looking for a way to join us in an unstoppable inferno.
His arms enveloped me, his fingers tracing gentle circles along my back as my hands hovered for a moment before settling around him. He lowered his head, breathing me in at the crook of my neck. His touch was so soft it made me feel like his treasure.
And as I breathed him in, the little dull ache, ever present in my chest since he betrayed me, eased for just a moment. A moment of reprieve.
The addictive citrus scent of his skin made my head spin. I had missed it. Dearly.
Not because he was my mate, or because I craved him—though both were true.
Deep down, I missed him—the one who had shown me what life could be.
Not just pain and survival, but something more.
A life where even the worst moments were eased by fleeting warmth like this, enough to make me believe there was light at the end of a long, winding tunnel.
And most of all, I missed his flames. Their warmth. Their protectiveness. The way they accepted mine with reverence… even when I was his enemy. Someone he should have hated.
All of it rushed back in a heartbreaking need to forgive all his wrongs. But I couldn’t. I wouldn’t. Because if I did, if I opened myself up again, what would stop him from breaking me once more when the greater good demanded it?
I understood him. But for once in my life I wanted to be somebody’s first choice. My heart couldn’t take another betrayal. I wouldn’t survive the next time.
Dropping my hands—reluctantly—and hoping he would take it as his cue to move away, I watched him linger a little too long and squeeze me a little tighter.
‘It feels like I can finally breathe,’ he whispered while stepping away. ‘I had something planned for you in a few days, but I think you need it today.’
For a second, so could I. ‘What are you talking about?’
‘You’ll see,’ he said with a smile.