Chapter 19 #2
What? What did I just say? I had to catch up with myself.
It had just come out automatically. Maybe something about being back in the library had put me in ‘customer service’ mode, where I just had to try to sign everyone up, no matter what.
Cooper looked just as shocked as I felt, his eyes losing their cute crinkles as they widened and his brows shot up.
‘That’s really kind of you. I really don’t want to cause any problems for you and I can just order a book or something and have it go to one of those lockers at the supermarket. It’ll just take a while to arrive, that’s all.’
‘That’s… AHA!’ I grabbed a thin book off the shelf.
Cooper jumped again and I pulled an apologetic face. ‘Sorry! I just saw this. Essential Boat Maintenance – not very long but it’ll do the job.’
He snorted, and I rolled my eyes. ‘Funny.’
‘Sorry, that’s just usually my line.’ He was chuckling now. I glanced down and then back up, sure he’d caught me looking, but he just continued. ‘But yeah, no, that sounds like it might be helpful. I’ll just have to copy down what I need.’
I flicked through the book doubtfully to cover my sudden embarrassment. ‘Looks like a lot of diagrams. How good are you at drawing?’
‘Not too bad actually,’ he said wryly, as if making a private joke, then he peered down at the book. ‘But not that good, what even are those symbols?’
‘I’d say “Take a picture on your phone” but I’ve seen it and I doubt you’d be able to read anything if you used that thing.
’ I was hoping this offhand comment might prompt him to share the story behind that shady phone.
Maybe he’d dropped his iPhone in the canal and it was just a stopgap until he got a new one.
But he didn’t offer any kind of explanation.
Not that he owed me one at all, I was just sort of hoping he’d be able to put my doubts to rest.
‘Too right,’ he sighed. ‘I suppose it’d be bad form to admit that the other option is to steal it – seeing as you used to work here.
Though,’ he leant in conspiratorially, warm breath tickling my cheek in a minty rush, ‘that would mean you know all the security measures, you could help me out – make it an inside job and I’ll cut you in for half the appendices? ’
I could tell he was joking, but there was an air of slight desperation about him.
He obviously needed the book and, for whatever reason, he seemed reluctant to get a library card sorted out.
Which was a shame because it was useful to have, especially for someone in his position – the boat probably didn’t even have internet.
Free internet was the most popular service aside from the printers and the photocopier.
The actual books weren’t really on the top of anyone’s list these days.
‘The photocopier,’ I realised, and snapped my fingers. ‘We can copy the pages for you and you can take them.’
‘Genius – see, knew it would pay to have insider knowledge,’ Cooper said, seeming to relax now that we’d found a solution that didn’t involve his lack of address or personal information. Interesting that. But it wasn’t on me to pry.
I led him over to the photocopier – ancient and temperamental as always – directed him on which change it would accept and which it would simply swallow (anything round was a no-go – fifties and twenties only).
The copier churned out warm pages with the incomprehensible diagrams on them.
Cooper rolled them up and tucked them under his arm like a swagger stick, then offered me a salute.
‘Cheers. Now I just need to work out what they say and if it’s useful, and then how to implement it – easy.’
I laughed. ‘Well, if you need any other books or a lift to Halfords, let me know. I know a bit about engines too – though that’s mostly cars.’
‘That’s… unexpected,’ Cooper said, then looked embarrassed. ‘Jesus, that was awful – I sounded like my dad.’
‘It’s fine.’
He shook his head. ‘It’s really not. I’m sorry – I’ve spent the better part of thirty years trying to be just like him, but not any more. And that was a shitty thing to say. Sorry.’
The seriousness with which he was taking it was intense. I reached out and put my hand on his arm. He looked so angry with himself and the muscles under my hand were miserably tense.
‘Thanks for apologising – I know I don’t look like a car nut,’ I said, trying to lighten the mood. ‘I’m not, to be honest. I’d much rather let the mechanics do their thing. My dad is just a big believer in life skills. I can plaster too. Not well or anything, but passable.’
‘Starting to think there’s nothing you can’t do,’ Cooper said, relaxing under my touch.
He didn’t say it in the way Richard would have.
In that ‘all right, we get it’ kind of way.
He was dead serious and earnest. He was looking at me like I was this competent, put-together person.
It felt good, having him look at me like that.
Being allowed to be proud of myself without worrying he’d take it as some kind of slight.
I realised I still had my hand on his arm and let it fall. He glanced at my retreating fingers as if he wished they were still on him. My throat was suddenly dry.
‘You know what they say – Jack of all trades, master of none. Except crochet,’ I said, flustered.
‘I’ll remember that. Thanks.’ He smiled at me and watched me for a beat too long, making me blush slightly.
I hadn’t realised how close we’d drifted together.
His voice was low and we were in our own private world.
‘I was actually heading back to the boat now, if you wanted to come back for a tea and a poke around the engine block – or just to check on the dog, you know. In case you were worried about him.’