Chapter 15 Calytrix
FIFTEEN
CALYTRIX
“Iguess we won’t be taking all of the things we’ve prepared all these weeks,” Nova sighed after Zaria left us, having informed us of the plan to get out of the kingdom.
“Father can have it all shipped once we are there. The important thing is we are safe traveling,” I reassured her.
“And you think we will be? This all sounds risky to me.”
“Yes, I trust Nyx,” I said confidently.
“You hardly know him!” she scoffed.
“I trust his reputation. Plus, Zaria seems like a very trustworthy fae to me. She didn’t have to meet with us like that. In these matters, our opinion would normally not even factor. It was decent of them to care enough to consult us. Father would never.”
“True,” she mused. “I like her. They all seem very nice, really.”
I side-eyed her. “Including Prince Alaric?”
Nova actually blushed.
“Goddess, I was teasing, but you like him, don’t you?”
“I wouldn’t say that, but he seems a decent male.”
“Mmhmm.”
“It could be worse is all I’m saying.”
“You mean you could be betrothed to a known rake with tendencies towards irrational anger, like me?”
“Come now, Caly, we thought those things of both the twins, but it is clear Prince Alaric is nothing of the sort. Perhaps Prince Arkyn is different from our expectations as well.”
“All we knew of Alaric is that he is loyal to his brother. That didn’t suggest they were the same, just that he lived in his brother’s shadow and probably stayed on his good side for peace.”
“You don’t know until you meet him, is all I’m saying.”
“I can’t wait,” I said through gritted teeth.
“The others seem nice, too—Kol and the other guard, I mean,” she said after a long moment.
“Faolan,” I corrected before I could catch myself.
Her eyes met mine, and she studied me.
“I heard Zaria speaking of him to Nyx,” I justified.
“Have you talked to him?” she asked.
“No, he is keeping his distance,” I said, trying to keep my tone level and disinterested.
“As a guard should, I suppose,” she mused.
“Kol isn’t, though,” I hedged, feeling my annoyance rise. Why was he?
“Kol is Nyx’s brother. He is more than just a guard.”
“I suppose, but given the circumstances, isn’t it unsettling that one of our guards is acting strange?”
“Strange how?”
I questioned the sense in voicing it to her. But she was my twin, and normally, we didn’t have secrets. “He was staring at me during the reception. Then he vanished during the attack.”
Nova gasped. “You think he had something to do with the attack?”
“No, nothing like that.” I wasn’t sure how I was certain, but I was. I had no suspicions of him being connected with the undead. “But he was staring at me intently through the whole reception, and since then, seems to have avoided me completely. It doesn’t make any sense.”
Nova looks thoughtful. “Are you sure he was looking at you and not just the new surroundings and fae?”
“I’m certain. I could not only feel his eyes on me the whole time, but I felt drawn to him in a way that I have never experienced before. Then for him to disappear during the banquet and then practically run away when I tried to introduce myself later… It’s just unsettling, that’s all.”
“Hmm,” was all Nova had to say.
I knew I should not have said anything. I just couldn’t make peace with it. I wanted to find out what was going on with him, and I couldn’t explain it to myself, never mind her. It just felt like it was going to eat me up if I didn’t do something about it.
“I think I should try and find him. Make proper introductions and smooth things over before we have to spend weeks all cooped up together, don’t you?”
Nova’s mouth opened and closed like she warred with her thoughts. “I guess…”
“Say what you’re thinking,” I demanded, beginning to pace.
“I’m not sure why it matters to you. He’s just a guard. But if it feels important, then you should.”
“It matters because guards are fae too,” I grumbled. Not sure why I chose that particular hill to die on. Things were getting worse by the minute. This was spiraling, and I needed to get control.
“Of course they are,” she placated, seemingly stunned by my outburst. “Like you say, we are all going to be forced to endure each other’s company for a while, so clearing the air is good, I think.”
“I just don’t want things to be awkward. I have enough to worry about with this move.”
“Indeed.” She tried touching my arm in comfort, but I couldn’t stop my pacing.
“I think I’m going to go and find him now, before we turn in.” I needed to do this, or I would never rest. I glanced at Nova for reassurance, but she was looking at me like I was a caged beast about to be let out.
“Okay, if it will help you rest…”
I nodded, then, before I could change my mind, headed for the door.
“Still avoiding me then?” I asked, or stated…
maybe accused? Gods, I didn’t know where my head was.
Why did I say that? I was a mess of irrational feelings.
It was more than just making introductions, I rationalized.
It was a lot to put our lives in the hands of this small group and trust that they would keep us safe, especially now that we knew that we were targets.
So I told myself I wanted to make sure that he would be accompanying us back, you know, for numbers’ sake.
“I’m not avoiding you,” he replied with lazy disinterest. Though I could sense it was feigned somehow.
“No?”
“Why would I be?” He frowned.
This was not going well. I shook my head as if to somehow reset this conversation.
“Forgive me, I just wanted to meet our guards properly. I’m Caly, it’s Faolan, isn’t it?
” I held out my hand. He looked at my hand and then back up into my eyes.
I felt a physical reaction to his intense gaze, the likes of which I’d never known.
It was as if my soul was more settled when he looked at me.
Not good. I was to be wed, regardless of how I felt.
I couldn’t complicate that by feeling drawn to one of the guards charged with delivering me.
When he didn’t take my hand after an awkward pause, I withdrew it shakily. Perfect.
“As I said before, you needn’t introduce yourself. I’m merely a guard.” He waved me off, dismissing me and making to walk away.
I felt ire rise in me, and I wouldn’t let him get away with it. “I beg your pardon, but I feel it’s essential I know those responsible for my life and that of my sister’s in the coming weeks. You’ll forgive me if I seek reassurance.”
He halted, having not made it past me in the hallway, so we now stood quite close. I shivered as if all my hairs leaned in towards him. He drew in a deep breath as if summoning strength and let it out in a sigh. “Yes. It’s Faolan, Your Highness.”
The title surprised me. “You do not need to address me as a princess.”
“You will be one soon enough. It’s proper to acknowledge that,” he said, and it felt as though he was using the title as a shield to maintain distance between us, though I could not fathom why.
“Is there anything else I can do for you before I get back to the pressing work of ensuring your safety and comfort for when we leave?”
I ground my teeth. It was a low blow. “I just wanted to introduce myself properly since we will be spending quite a bit of time together.”
“Well, now we are acquainted, yes?”
“Yes.” I didn’t know what else to answer. What was his problem?
“Is there anything else?”
“No.” I had never felt so stupid. I looked like a fool for this pointless interaction, and all I had wanted was to make the connection to feel less awkward in his presence, not more.
“Okay…” he said hesitantly.
“Okay,” I repeated, trying to sound like my mission had been accomplished to save face.
“If you’ll excuse me, I have to see to our provisions before we set sail,” he said, stepping to the side to try and pass me.
I lurched awkwardly out of his way, looking even more foolish for the effort. “Of course.”
He nodded once and hastily disappeared down the hallway.
Fuck. Well done, Caly…you looked insane.
I huffed and kicked the base of one of fathers gaudy sculptures, sending pain through my toe. “Ouch!”
I heard more footsteps coming from the guest wing and decided to retreat back to our rooms before anyone else saw me making a fool of myself.
“Did you find him?” Nova asked when I reached my chamber, causing me to jump in fright.
“Did you wait here just to be nosy?” I scolded, heading for my dresser to take down my hair.
“Yes, now answer my question.”
“I found him.”
“And?”
I pulled several pins from my hair and sighed as it eased from their hold. Picking up my brush, I began working through it section by section. “And what? I introduced myself and that was that.”
“That’s all?”
“What else is there?” I didn’t want to let on how deflated I was. I felt like the entire thing was in my head. Did I hallucinate him fixating on me when they arrived? Was I looking for anything other than the fate the Gods prescribed?
I turned in my seat to fix her with a glare. “I wanted to make sure I knew who’d be escorting us. Don’t you think it’s important to know those who will be keeping us safe?”
“I guess,” she said, sounding unconvinced, but I couldn’t admit to it now. Not when I felt like I was losing my mind.
“There you go then. We met the others at the banquet. Faolan was the missing piece, and I wanted to fix that before we sail. Subject closed.” I turned back to face the mirror and began brushing again.