33. Jax
JAX
“Can you cancel my last two appointments? I’m going home.”
“Are you okay?” Ana asks as I remove my cap and run my fingers through my hair.
“I will be,” I reply, giving her a half-hearted smile. “See if you can move them to tomorrow.”
“But tomorrow is your day off.”
“That’s fine. I don’t have any plans, so I can come in.” Maddie’s at school during the day anyway.
“Okay. I’ll organise it now and text you with the details.”
“Thank you.” I push through the front door and into the street. I need some fucking air. No, I need a damn cigarette. I have a packet stashed in my car for just such an occasion.
I rub my hand across my chest in an attempt to relieve the dull ache that’s settled there. I’m not sure if it’s indigestion or Candice. My guess is Candice. I’m angry that we’ve both fought these feelings for so long—and look where it got us … fucking nowhere.
I’ve waited my entire adult life to hear her say those words, but now that she has, I’m torn. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel the same way, but her lies almost broke me. How can I get past that?
Am I capable of spending the rest of my life loving her from afar? I doubt it. It’s not like I can avoid her, we share a child.
Trying to act like I don’t care is tearing me apart.
The moment I get home, I head straight for my car to grab a smoke out of the glove compartment.
I take a long drag as I flip open the lid on my letterbox.
I no longer have to worry about my family contacting me, I’m going to treat them as they treat me—like they don’t exist. It’s the only way.
As far as I’m concerned, they’re dead to me now.
I pick up the hand-addressed envelope inside. I don’t recognise the writing. Flipping it over, I smile. It’s a letter from Beau, all the way from Western Australia. We spoke at length on the phone after Candice returned, but I haven’t heard from him since.
I go into the kitchen and grab a bottle of Jack out of the cupboard and a shot glass.
My titty cup, the one Candice bought me.
Maybe not the best cup for this situation, but I’m going to use it regardless.
Placing them on the breakfast bar, I pick up Beau’s letter and open it. I could use a pick-me-up.
Hello, my dear friend,
I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to write. James bought me a mobile phone not long after I moved here, so we could keep in touch, but I’ve yet to master how to use the darn thing.
Life for me is good. I’ve been busy helping Alana with Aiden and the baby, while James works long hours at his job. Being a full-time grandfather is exhausting, but I love it. It keeps me young.
I have you, and only you, to thank for that.
Your kindness and compassion for an old man has changed my life.
I’m not sure where I’d be now if you hadn’t taken me in and helped me reconnect with my family.
Don’t ever let anyone change who you are, son.
You’re an honourable young man, Jax, and I’m blessed to have someone of your stature in my life.
My granddaughter, May, was born six months ago. Yes, they named her after my sweet May. God rest her soul. Little May has her grandmother’s eyes and sweet nature. I’m not ashamed to admit that I worship the ground she walks on. It’s like having a piece of my wife back …
I stop reading when my phone rings.
Placing the letter down on the breakfast bar, I slide my phone out of my pocket and see Sophia’s name on the screen. My first thought is my daughter.
“Hey. Is everything okay with Maddie?” I ask the moment the phone is to my ear.
“No, it’s Candice … she’s been attacked.”
“What do you mean by ‘attacked’?” I ask as I grab my keys. “Where is she?”
“She’s at work. One of her clients attacked her. She said she was okay, but she was probably just saying that so I wouldn’t worry.”
I’m already jogging to the car by the time she’s finished speaking. “I’m heading there now.”
“I was going to see if you would watch Maddie, so I could go.”
“You stay with Maddie. I’ll go to Candice.” My hand shakes as I try to put the keys in the ignition.
“Okay. Please call me as soon as you’ve seen her.”
The moment she starts to cry I freak out even more.
Please let her be okay .
I swear I broke every speed limit on the way. There are two police cars and two ambulances parked out front of her workplace when I arrive. The site has me feeling sick to my stomach.
I screech to a stop behind one of the cop cars, running straight to the officer standing by the door.
“I’m looking for Candice, the girl who was attacked.”
“Are you family?”
“Yes.” That’s not a lie. Hypothetically, she’s always been like family to me, and she is the mother of my daughter.
He opens the glass door, flicking his head to let me know she’s inside.
My heart beats furiously against my ribcage as I enter.
I have no idea what I’m going to find. My eyes scan the reception area and relief floods through me the moment I see her sitting in a chair, alert and talking with one of the officers.
I make a beeline straight for her. I have her wrapped tightly in my arms almost before she even realises I’m here.
“Jax,” I hear her whisper as her fists clutch the front of my shirt.
“Thank Christ you’re okay.”
“I thought Sophia was coming.”
“I told her to stay with Maddie. I wanted to come. I needed to see for myself that you were okay…”
“I’m glad you came,” she says, resting her head on my chest and sliding her arms around my waist.
She trembles in my arms, so I don’t let go until she settles. When I do release her, I step back to see her face. Tears rise to her eyes when I tenderly cup her jaw in my hands. That’s when I notice the mark on her cheek and the cut on her swollen bottom lip, and it has me seeing red.
“Who did this to you?”
“I’m okay. Honestly. He came out of this a lot worse off than me.”
“He? A guy hit you?” My blood pressure spikes to a dangerous level. I look at the cop standing beside me.
“Once he’s been treated for his injuries, he’ll be charged,” the officer says. The cop has a smirk on his face, but nothing is amusing about this situation.
Dropping my hands away from Candice, I turn to leave. I don’t care what injuries he has, nobody hits my girl and walks away from it.
“Jax, don’t,” Candice pleads, reaching for me.
“I’d advise you to listen to your wife,” the officer adds.
I should tell him she’s not my wife, but for some reason, I don’t.
“Can we have a few minutes alone?” Candice asks the officer.
“Sure. We’ll be right outside.” He gives me a look as he passes, a warning not to do anything stupid.
The anger is just rolling off me as I run my fingers through my hair, trying to calm the hell down. For Candice’s sake, if nothing else.
“I appreciate you coming here,” she says once we’re alone. “And I love that you want to defend my honour, but hurting him will only get you in trouble. I don’t want that.”
When I exhale a long breath, she laces her fingers through mine. Her touch, like always, seems to have an immediate soothing effect. Nobody has ever come close to making me feel the things this woman does.
“Stop fussing,” Candice says when I pass her a clean towel, a pair of my sweats and a T-shirt.
She smiles, but I can tell it’s forced. She’s trying to play this down, but I felt how badly she was shaking when I first arrived at her work.
She’s barely said a word since we left there.
I’m not stupid, I know she’s affected by what happened.
“I’ll be right outside if you need me.”
“Thank you.” She reaches for my hand, giving it a small squeeze before I turn and leave her to shower in peace.
I called Sophia while the paramedics checked her over. Of course, Candice refused to go to the hospital. She’s so stubborn.
Sophia protested when I said I was taking Candice back to my place, but when I mentioned that I didn’t want Maddie to see her mother like this, she reluctantly agreed. That was only part of the reason. I wanted to be the one to take care of her.
It meant I’d be giving up my night with my daughter, but Candice needed me more. I promised Sophia I’d bring Candice home later tonight after Maddie had gone to bed.
When I hear the spray of the water, I rest my forehead against the wood and try not to think of Candice naked on the other side of the door. She’s been through a traumatic experience. The last thing she needs is me lusting after her.
A few minutes later, I swear I hear her crying. I feel an overwhelming compulsion to go to her and my hand instinctively moves to the doorhandle. But after everything that’s happened today, I think better of it. I don’t want to traumatise her further.
A good twenty minutes pass, but I continue to wait outside the bathroom just like I promised. She can take all the time she needs, I’m not going anywhere. My primary concern right now is her.
I’m leaning up against the wall in the hallway with my arms crossed over my chest when she finally emerges. Her hair is wet, her face is free of makeup, and she looks sexy as fuck in my shirt. She has her dirty clothes in her hands, so I take them from her.
“I’ll put these in the laundry.”
“Thank you.”
“Are you feeling better after the shower?” I ask as she follows me to the lounge room. It’s a stupid question. A shower isn’t going to help erase what she’s been through.
“I guess,” she replies with a shrug.
I reach for the throw blanket that’s hanging over the back of the sofa and hand it to her. “Wrap yourself in this. I’ll be right back.” I hold her dirty clothes up, so she knows I’m only going to the laundry.
As I pass back through the kitchen, I see the bottle of Jack I got out earlier still sitting on the breakfast bar. I grab it, bringing it into the lounge room with me. A stiff drink may settle her nerves.
“Here. Drink this.” Filling the glass, I pass it to her. “It’s not Sambuca.” I hold up the bottle of Jack Daniels. “This is all I have.”