Chapter 11
What Makes Jade Cry
Alex
My fingertips ran up my temple again, trying to keep the coconut oil in my hair and not on my face. I slowly paced the living room, waiting for Jade. Because Jade was fucking crazy and I fucking couldn’t get enough.
Jade proposed a genius idea, and I doubted my own self because why the hell hadn’t we thought of that? Anticipation shook my chest and I waited, making sure to take deep breaths in. I was a damn mess.
There was no denying anything—we’d almost fucking kissed. It was right there, just on the precipice, and it was so sweet, tempting, and whole.
This kidnapping was going off the rails at full speed.
It would all result in a total train wreck and I wasn’t sure we’d ever be able to pick up the pieces. I wasn’t sure anyone would come out of this alive.
I heard a click behind me and my heart jumped into my throat. I turned, hungrily taking in the sight of Jade in that gold dress that I first saw her in. The room imploded in light. My mouth was parched as I let my eyes wander, this time, feeling minimal guilt.
“You like this dress, huh?” Jade said something, but I was still studying the way the straps of her heels wrapped around her ankles. Up, I pulled my gaze higher, indulging in the sight of her bare legs.
Think of something else. Pickles, dusty old men, garbage dumpsters. Think of anything to not get hard.
Because why was this vixen making me hard all the fucking time? The last time I was with a woman—Gianna, to be precise—I couldn’t get it up. And now? It was like my dick was living through a resurrection—just a fucking jack-in-the-box at the mere sight and smell of Jade.
She strutted closer, my logical brain dying in that moment. “Mm-hmm. This little whore dress makes you drool,” Jade prompted me, but I had a response ready, despite the lack of any thoughts.
“Every dress you wear makes me drool, Jade.”
Looking a little lost, she stared up at me, blinking so innocently. God damn, I stared too. Technically, I should have been leading. I should have been in control.
Slowly, Jade gathered her hair into a high ponytail, never looking away. I’d never seen her this close with her hair up and I wasn’t sure I’d be able to take any more transformations tonight without combusting.
She was objectively the most beautiful woman I’d ever laid my eyes on. Everything about her got my blood pumping. She glowed. Emanated some kind of light that beckoned me to her.
“You have the zip ties?”
I nodded, ripping my gaze away from her. She wore dark makeup and the same lipstick from that first night. Yes. I remembered every detail.
Yes. It was a problem.
I pointed toward the wall and Jade clicked her heels, slowly stepping toward it. Gracefully, she took a seat on the plastic chair.
It was my turn.
I looked her over, noticing the way she placed her feet together and her hands behind her back, as if it were muscle memory. I crouched down, wrapping the zip ties around her ankles, the brightly illuminated house our only witness.
My fingers grazed her skin, and it almost burned. I pulled on the zip tie, thinking it was enough, but she giggled quietly. “You should probably tighten it. Don’t have any mercy. Just like that first night.”
Her words cut me deep—I was the one who gave the command to restrain her. I pulled harder, but slowly, making sure not to hurt her.
“Wait, actually…” She paused, looking around uncertainly. “I…I need to be crying at least. Or have signs of crying.”
That’s right.
“Do you want to use water?” I proposed, still crouching in front of her, her knees at my eye level.
“I don’t know.” She shrugged, thinking it over. “He’ll dissect the video. What if he notices it’s not real? He’s…he’s very skilled. He’ll pay attention to that.” She bit her bottom lip, deciding what to do. “Just make me cry.” She threw the request out like it was a normal, everyday occurrence.
Instead, we both laughed. It was strange—to laugh with her. The sound was light and bubbly, and genuine.
“Um. What usually makes you cry?”
She thought about it, then listed a few things. “Animals being hurt? Injustice? Child exploitation? When I’m being restrained by a few large men? Gagged and bound?” She leaned in closer, whispering the last words.
“Are you going to hold it over my head forever?” I whispered too, her words breaking my heart.
“You planning to keep me forever?”
I didn’t need to think about it, I could be honest with myself now—yes. A resounding yes. I wanted to keep her forever. I wanted the clock to stop ticking and the days to stop rolling. I just wanted her here with me.
“Would you like that?”
“You’re a master deflector.” Her eyes sparkled as she settled into the chair.
“Maybe. But you’re not answering the question. A failure to object is technically tacit approval, so…”
Jade’s eyes widened and I chuckled at her reaction. “Wow. Been brushing up on your legal terminology, have you?” Her eyes were filled with so much joy. And it was for me.
“Just trying to keep up with you, Malyshka.”
“Stop making me smile.” Jade turned away for a moment, failing to hide her wide grin. “You’re a bad man and I’m trying very hard to stay mad at you for what you did.”
“Mmm.” I took in the sight of her naked thighs, momentarily forgetting what our plan was. “You’re doing a terrible job of it. Guess I’m not the only one emotionally repressed.”
For the first time, I saw it—the way her cheeks took on color. She averted her gaze, immediately bringing the conversation back. “Okay. I have to cry. Hang on.” Jade put her face in her hands, and I watched her sit there, trying to make herself cry.
“Let’s just use wate—”
“No, it has to be real.” She sat back and steadied herself. “I’m going to tell you something.” Jade opened her eyes, directing all her attention to me. “It’s going to be a trauma dump. I don’t want sympathy. I just need to say it so I cry, okay?”
Her clinical approach startled me. Hesitantly, I sat down on the floor in front of her, unsure that this was a good idea, but Jade took a deep breath in and began before I could disagree.
“One time Xavier smashed my face into a wall.” The sentence rolled off her tongue in one swift go, freezing me to the floor. “He grabbed my hair and then he just—sort of, I don’t know…flung me into the nearest wall.”
She swung her arm out, the action rough and fast. “He had his hand in my hair and then he just, um…h-he pulled me back to him and then just…threw me to the side. Like I was…like I was garbage.”
Jade’s gaze found mine, her eyes filling with tears just as I filled with rage. Our eyes on each other, I sat in front of her on the floor, listening to another one of her horror stories.
“My nose bled,” she continued, “but not a lot. What hurt the most was the sentiment, you know?” she whispered, not letting me get a word in. “The bruise…on my eye? It was massive. I could barely hide it with makeup. But it was the way he did it.”
I just need to say it so I cry.
And she did.
A large tear fell off Jade’s eyelashes, slowly sliding down her cheek, and I couldn’t fucking stand it—I couldn’t stand watching her cry.
“He did it…like I was just a thing.” She emphasized the word, my heart bleeding out in my chest. “Like I was just an object. He just smashed one thing against another. I was just a thing to use. To hurt. To lie to.”
I lifted onto my knees and shifted closer to her, not knowing where to put my hands.
“The next week,” Jade gulped, still looking into my eyes with her wet and sad ones.
“I-I still had the bruise on my face and he…he manipulated me into having sex with him. He didn’t force me.
” She shook her head as if that would smooth anything over.
“He apologized. So many times. He pleaded. Promised it was an accident and that he would never do it again. And I…and I fucking believed him!”
Jade cried audibly now, burying her face in her hands, and that was my breaking point. I wrapped my arms around her and pressed her into my chest.
And she fit into me. Perfectly. All of her molded into me the same way my body accommodated her. Her pain and her fear.
God, this was too much. Jade trembled in my arms, her skin so soft, supple, glistening with coconut oil, but her quiet sobs warping reality.
I didn’t know what to say. There was nothing to say. Instead, I did the only thing I could in the moment—just held her. Shielded her from the world.
And she stayed.
“I believed him…” Jade sniffled loudly, the scent of coconut permeating us both. “But he…he…” she stammered, afraid to say it.
“You don’t have to, Jade. You don’t have to say anything el—”
“No, no, listen.” She placed her hand on my chest and looked up at me, her makeup all over her cheeks just like that first night.
“Listen,” she implored, and I nodded, wanting nothing else but this—her, close by.
Even like this. Even in pain, in tears, in agony.
I wanted her in front of me in every single way.
“The next week," she restarted, “when he—when he manipulated me into sex and we did it, he…” She looked right past me, fighting with her thoughts. “He spanked me…but I didn’t want it with him. It wasn’t a thing we did, you know?”
I hated this. I hated him. Hated that I didn’t kill him when I had the fucking chance.
“I pleaded for him to stop,” she squeaked, a fresh wave of tears spilling out of her eyes. “I cried. I-I begged. I didn’t want it with him. I didn’t want it!”
Her heartbeat knocked against mine, this moment forever etching itself into my psyche. “We don’t have to do this, Jade…Let’s just stop, let me just cut the zip ties—”
“Oh yes!” Her voice trembled and she sniffled against me, nodding into my chest. “The video. Let’s do it.”
“No, no, Jade, we don’t have to—let’s just stop.” I leaned down, her sad eyes an inch away from mine. And somehow, in the middle of this calamity…she smiled.
“We have to.” She nodded, encouraging me. “You know why? Because my father didn’t believe me when I told him everything.” She divulged, my blood turning cold at this new information. “He blamed me. He said I must have done something wrong.”
Everything halted in that moment.
“He said that?” I double-checked, truly refusing to understand everything Jade unleashed.
Jade licked her bottom lip and straightened out, putting her hands behind her back again. “Zip tie me.”
The change was so sudden, like on the roof. One moment, she was real and vulnerable, and the next, she was all business, the mastermind behind this fake video we were about to film for her father.
I wanted more. I wanted to stay just like that and absorb her sadness. Distract her mind and show her that it didn’t have to be like that—that it was all in the past. I wanted that fire inside her. I wanted to hold it, take it within me, and protect it from all the terror in her life.
“I don’t want to, Malyshka…” I reached out, swiping the last tear off her chin. “I don’t want to zip tie you, Jade. I want…”
But I couldn't tell her everything I wanted. Could barely admit it to myself.
“Finish it, Alex,” she spoke softly, her eyes red-rimmed and wet, but her determination stronger than ever. “Finish what you started. Come on. Zip tie my wrists.”
That request coming out of her mouth didn’t jive in my brain. I took a few seconds to think about it, but it was all ready and Jade had cried her eyes out for the perfect shot. I reached around her and collected both her wrists in one hand, pulling on the hard plastic.
Then I stepped back.
Picked up the burner phone.
And pressed play.