Chapter 35
Close Your Eyes And Never Let Go
Jade
Iknocked on the front door of my father’s house at exactly seven in the evening. My hair was in a loose up-do and I wore a black silk dress, mostly because I felt safe in black around my father.
But also…it was strategic. I wore a dress because I had something inside me, and if shit hit the fan, I needed to have easy access.
Holy.
Fucking.
Shit.
This was all Alex’s fault.
My cum will run down your thighs…so you remember who you belong to.
His fingertips were imprinted on my skin. His voice echoed in my ears. His love, his life, his energy…it was within me.
Right after he fucked the living daylights out of me, he pushed a vibrator inside me that he was going to control remotely.
While I was having dinner with my father.
My life was amazing.
My father swung the door open and forced a small smile, like always.
It had been a week since Xavier figured out that Alex and I were together.
Did he tell my father? I had no idea. I expected my dad to absolutely rage this whole week, but he’d said nothing after his lunch with Xavier. He was exactly the same as always.
Was he truly oblivious? It seemed so. It was too risky to make any sudden changes, so while I dutifully showed up at work every day, Alex stayed in my apartment and sifted through the digitized evidence the police had on The Nightcrawlers, deleting anything he could without raising suspicions.
As predicted, Julian opened the photo I sent him the same day we had coffee together, and ever since then, Alex had access to everything that was in the possession of the police department.
I set the dining table at my father’s house, acutely aware of the little black device inside me. Just as I thought about Alex, another knock sounded on the front door.
Without missing a beat, my father walked past me and toward the front door, swinging it open and inviting someone in.
“Xavy! So good of you to join us.”
I twisted back, thinking I must have misheard.
No…it couldn’t have been.
“Seb, thanks for the invite.”
But it was. Xavier stepped in, his cold eyes finding me right away. The bouquet of flowers in his hands was so incongruent with his personality.
“Jade.” He strolled closer. “These are for you.”
I stood there with a plate still in my hands, refusing to believe my ears and eyes. Was my father oblivious, or did he hate me? Was I a pawn to him? Did he want to hurt me? Was he hoping Xavier would actually kill me this time?
“Take them.” Xavier outstretched his hand with the flowers, but I couldn’t move.
“Jade, don’t be rude,” my father said once he stepped into the dining room. Rude? Oh, I wasn’t rude, I was fuming.
Instead of indulging them both, I set the plate down and turned away, taking fast steps into the kitchen and abandoning them in the dining room.
I could get through this.
But just as that thought crossed my mind, a low vibration started inside me. I halted mid-step.
Oh God, why did I agree to this?!
I closed my eyes, remembering what Alex whispered in my ear before I left—Moya. Mine. I’ll be waiting for you.
“You’re crossing all lines, Jade.” My father’s dangerous voice sounded behind me when I pulled the cutlery drawer open, concentrating on anything except the sensation between my legs.
“Me? No, I’m within all the lines. You’re the one who’s invited a fucking rapist into your own home!
” I turned to my father, my face burning, but not from anger.
“Why are you so desperate to set me up with him again?” I whisper-yelled, just as the little torture device inside me stopped, as if Alex knew the conversation I was engaged in.
My father stared down at me, his pupils blown wide. “That’s a very serious accusation,” he whispered, stepping closer. “You shouldn’t throw words like that around.”
“Rapist?” I asked louder. “He tried to rape me, Dad. You don’t believe your own daughter?”
“Xavier would never do such a thing,” he said, shocking me to my core with that statement.
“He loves you. He’s been nothing but good to you.
He’s suffered all these months without you!
” My father was getting heated, still trying to keep his voice down.
“You’re throwing away a good thing for no reason. ”
“You’re delusional. You’re blind and stupid if you believe him.” I gulped, holding my composure. “I’ll stay for dinner, but I don’t appreciate being ambushed like this. And after this dinner, I will never see him again.”
I ripped the forks and knives out of the drawer and sidestepped my father to get back to the dining room, but he had something else to say.
“You’ll change your mind after tonight.”
But I barely heard him. I rushed into the dining room and set the cutlery on the table, ignoring the way Xavier leered at me.
I poked the eggplant with my fork, counting down the minutes until the end of this dinner. My father’s words swirled inside me. Xavier would never do such a thing.
The rapist and my poor excuse for a father chatted at dinner while I sat there quietly, contributing nothing to the conversation. The vibrator was just as silent as me.
“You’re writing the LSAT? That’s great to hear, Xavier.” My father’s voice broke through my haze. I lifted my head, unsure of what I’d just heard. “Jade? You haven’t touched your dinner.”
“I hate eggplant,” I explained for the thousandth time.
My father knew that. We had our first eggplant incident when I was six or seven—I threw up all the eggplant he forced me to eat, right onto the dinner table.
But no matter my feelings about eggplant, he cooked and served it to me throughout my life.
Displeased, my father stood from his chair and began clearing our plates.
“You’re applying to law school?” I asked Xavier once my father disappeared into the kitchen. Xavier smiled widely, shaking his head side to side.
“You’re both so naive.” He smiled as if I was delusional to ask that. It took me a second to realize—he was posturing in front of my dad. Everything he did, everything he said, everything he was…was a lie.
“You’re lying to Seb just to get me? That’s the most pathetic thing I’ve ever heard.”
Xavier chuckled quietly and reached across the table, but I recoiled back before he could get to me.
“I’m not lying. I’m acting. For example, I’m acting as if I don’t know that you’ve been fucking a grifter who sells used cars.” He melted into another repulsive smile, tilting his head. “But about the LSATs…will you tutor me?”
Xavier was a true chameleon, showing his true colors only to me while playing the role of a perfect and heartbroken gentleman in front of my father.
Before I could tell him how much I hated him, the device inside me turned on and I sat up suddenly, startling Xavier. I stared at him, lost and panicking.
The vibrations were steady, foreign, and somehow sensational. It was like a slow heat spreading through me. Up my stomach, into my thighs, and most importantly, right inside my pussy.
Xavier looked me over with suspicion while I clenched my thighs and breathed in deep. In and out. In and out.
“What’s wrong with you?”
“Nothing,” I whispered and sat back in the chair, aware of my every movement. “You’re a fucking p-pig, and I hate you.”
Leaning back was a bad idea. This new angle hit a different spot, and oh God, it was melting me. I closed my eyes and fell into memories of Alex’s tongue on me. His lips kissing me. His eyes looking into mine. His gentle hands—
“Jade?” A strict voice cut through, and I shot my eyes open to see my father standing at the table, a carafe with coffee in his hands. “What’re you doing?”
The heat between my legs was building while my father and Xavier stared at me, catching on that something was happening. I shifted my weight on the chair, accidentally increasing the wave of pleasure.
“I’m f-fine,” I squeaked. “I think the eggplant made me n—”
I gasped loudly, surprising myself. My fingers gripped the table, and I held back a moan, both panicking and elated.
“Nauseated,” I breathed out the word, sliding off the chair. “I need to use the restroom.”
All surroundings disappeared as I stumbled toward the powder room, desperately needing a release. I snatched my little purse off the console table at the front door and locked myself in the tiny room, promptly falling to my knees.
My thighs quivered uncontrollably. Tears were in my eyes, and my nails dug into the cold tile, using all my life energy to hold back a loud moan. Ugh, I wanted—I needed to grind on something. Alex’s dick.
Instead, I shoved my hand between my legs and dipped my fingers under the band of my thong, dragging mine and Alex’s juices to my clit. I swirled my finger, immediately finding the spot that made it all feel like a live wire.
With my other trembling hand, I pulled my phone out of my purse and typed out a text to the man who was torturing me long distance.
I’ll bite your balllls off
As soon as I dropped the phone, the little gizmo inside me picked up speed and I sobbed silently, on the verge of a physical breakdown.
It was overtaking me.
I breathed fast, keeled over on the tile floor, working my clit like a maniac and falling into it. Yes, God, everything tingled and beads of sweat collected on my forehead as I struggled for air, approaching a crescendo—fuck, just like that—
“Jade, are you all right?” A loud knock sounded somewhere close by, but I was floating away, my body surrendering to the pleasure Alex was gifting me.
“Yes!” I gasped loudly, keeping my finger on my clit, up and down, circling it with unforgiving speed. “Yes—ugh!”
It was too loud. The sound ripped out of me unrestrained as I shuddered on my knees, coming apart on the floor of my father’s powder room, praying and thanking everything—God, the universe, the Almighty—for letting me find a love like this.