Chapter Thirty-Three
Darkness. My world was awash in utter darkness, thick like sludge, pulling me ever downward into the abyss.
Its currents tossed me about. I didn’t care anymore.
It didn’t hurt. All I am, all I was, melded with them.
As I faded into annihilation, I could no longer tell where they ended and I began.
We were one, perfection, everything and nothing all at once.
Until we weren’t.
Light flared to life below me, cleaving me from eternity.
Sickly green, emerald light. With it came a feeling I’d thought I was incapable of: fear.
Even here, at the end of everything, I couldn’t outrun him, couldn’t escape him.
His power rose in bubbles from beneath me, driving me from the depths of darkness, tearing me from my repose.
Let me go, I begged without words. Please, just let me go…
But it wouldn’t release me, wouldn’t let me go. Fire ignited on my skin, bringing pain, real pain. My head broke through the surface of the sludge, and I drew a breath of air as my body caged my spirit.
I opened my eyes, gasping, struggling to sit up.
More aches came, pulling at my insides, and I collapsed backward, ears ringing, vision blurring, nerves crackling with static.
My consciousness wasn’t ready to be shunted back into my body.
My senses swirled like a raging storm. I thrashed against them, struggled to orient myself among foreign sensations, until a gentle hand met my shoulder. My muscles locked tight at the touch.
“It’s okay, Lillia,” Sitri said from somewhere beside me. “Nothing here can harm you. I promise.”
I groaned, letting my body go lax as my breathing calmed. His voice soothed me. Sitri stroked my arm, quelling my panic as my senses came into focus.
The first thing I noticed was the smell.
Vapula’s perfume, toxic and sweet, clashed with Sitri’s warm, smoky sandalwood aroma, but there was no blood, smoke, or choking dust. The air was clean, if disagreeably perfumed.
My vision settled next. I stared up at the canopy of a four-poster bed, draped with verdant velvet and dressed in pleated emerald silk.
Even the walls were green, decorated with wallpaper and molding that resembled vines and leaves.
And the crisp white light—so bright, so steady—came from somewhere out of my view.
The mattress shifted beside me, and I turned to see Sitri in all of his beauty; disheveled black hair glinting near-blue, his silver eyes gleaming, fangs shining where his smile showed them. From an end table, he lifted a gilded goblet, which he brought to my lips.
“Drink,” he commanded, and I did, deeply. Only after I’d drained it of bitter oils did the Prince return it to its place.
“How long was I out?” I croaked. “Where are we?”
“About five days now,” Sitri answered. My eyes widened. “That’s to be expected, though. You were in a sorry state and took a grievous wound. As for where we are, this was Vapula’s bedroom. Quite a bit nicer than mine, though I do detest green, personally.”
Was. He was really gone, then.
I tried again to sit up, only to find that my strength still hadn’t returned. Sitri’s hand on my lower back helped to guide my body upright. As the blankets fell away, they revealed a set of plain, silken clothes.
“You dressed me?”
“Those rags didn’t suit you. Too fragile, and far too degrading.” Sitri hesitated, then continued, “They were more blood than fabric by the time I got them off you.”
Oh, god. The blood. I could still almost smell it in the air.
There had been so much of it, more than I ever hoped to see in one place again.
Half of it must have been mine. My hand moved to my stomach, right where his blade had pierced me.
An inkling of pain warned me that the wound wasn’t fully healed.
“I didn’t think I would be waking up again,” I admitted.
“I know.” Sitri planted a gentle kiss on my cheek. “You made that quite clear, and under different circumstances, I might have thought the same. Even demons have our limits.”
“Then how…?”
“Your bindings, darling.”
“My bindings? Since when do you have that kind of power?”
Deafening silence followed before Sitri finally answered.
“I don’t.”
My brow furrowed. Wordlessly, Sitri brought his hands to the buttons on my shirt.
I watched in awe as the fabric fell away, exposing my breasts and the glowing sigil between them—a castle topped with a heart, and a cross underneath.
Wings sprouted from it on either side. The whole pattern was encased in a pair of concentric rings and glowed a rich emerald hue.
It was the seal of the Duke Vapula.
My muscles tensed at the sight of it. My breath hitched.
“I struck him down,” I whispered as the realization set in. “His magic… I felt it pulling me, dragging me from the darkness, but I didn’t realize…”
“It isn’t his anymore. It’s yours. You, darling, have been crowned as the next Duchess Vapula.”
The words had a surreal quality. Duchess Vapula. I turned them over and over in my head. There was so much wrapped up in that name, that title. So much I didn’t want to confront.
“We’re at war. This kingdom, these demons, they will expect me to lead.
Or try to overthrow me. Or both,” I muttered.
“And my legates… they’re the same ones who bowed to Vapula, and helped him do…
this. He had allies who will come for me, like he came for you when you succeeded the Princess.
I don’t know anything about war, about leadership. And that name, I just—”
The Prince silenced me with a kiss—deep, passionate, gentle yet unyielding. He knotted his hand into my hair. I opened myself to him, making way as he laid claim to my mouth. Sitri pulled back, still holding me. Heat rose on my cheeks. Our eyes met.
“Do you remember what you told me, darling? When you were so certain that you were about to meet your end?”
“Sitri, I…”
The pleasant warmth on my cheeks turned to a burning fire.
I reached for his magic, hoping to read his desires, but the last shreds of his gift scattered like threads in the wind.
A new power had claimed me, driven Sitri’s out.
That trick wouldn’t work for me anymore, but it would still work fine for Sitri.
Something about the way he looked at me, like he was reading an open book, suggested he’d already employed it.
I’d meant it when I told him I loved him, but now…
My chest tightened with the fear that I’d overstepped, that he might not feel the same.
Sitri grinned and swept his hand along my jaw until it reached my cheek. He pressed our lips together for a moment, leaving me too stunned to react.
“I love you, too, Lillia—no matter what your title or your charge. If you will have me, I shall stand with you, ever the shadow at your back. And if the threat of annihilation was all it took to make you confess…” His grin widened, and he laughed, deep and raspy.
“Perhaps I should have pushed you harder.”
“Yeah, right. I think you pushed me plenty hard.” I failed to stop a laugh of my own. As soon as it left my lips, pain rippled up my stomach. I groaned.
Sitri’s eyes twinkled with amusement. “Easy now. We wouldn’t want the new Duchess to reopen her wounds, would we?”
“Maybe you wouldn’t,” I said, “but I’m still not sure how many others are going to feel that way.”
My smile faded, and Sitri’s died in turn.
“Are you alright, darling?” he asked.
“I think so. I just need some time to process,” I admitted. “It’s… Everything is happening so quickly, and it’s a little overwhelming.”
“Then we shall take it slow,” he whispered into my ear. “And we will start by getting you taken care of. Is there anything I can do for you, my Duchess?”
My stomach growled almost on cue. “Some food would be nice, if that’s alright.”
“Consider it done,” Sitri said as he helped me lie back. “You wait here, and I shall be right back.”
When he returned, Sitri brought a hearty bowl of stew and half a loaf of bread.
The warm, savory smell made my mouth water.
I wolfed down the meal, savoring every bite as it eased my gnawing hunger.
When I was done, I offered Sitri the dishes, wincing as I reached up to hand them over. His gaze flicked to my stomach.
“There is medicine to ease your pain,” he offered. “I was told it will make you sleep. Do you want it, darling?”
“Can I see it? I might know what it is.”
“Of course.”
Sitri set the dishes on the desk across the room, then retrieved a small glass bottle from the end table. My Prince offered it to me, and I unscrewed the lid. A sweet, floral, slightly minty scent with alcohol undertones wafted out of it to meet me.
Vapula’s magic—my magic—had returned, no longer a mere muscle, but an entire body of knowledge that yielded answers freely. It was diethyl ether, a potent anesthetic. Diluted in alcohol, judging by the smell of it.
I pulled it away from my face. Even the vapors would affect me if I continued breathing them in, and I wasn’t ready to commit to that.
Not yet. The concoction promised me relief from the pain and burdens I carried.
A sip or two would dull my suffering, body, and mind, give me the reprieve I so desperately wanted…
Still, I hesitated.
I put the lid back on the bottle and stared at it for a few moments.
Part of me wanted it, wanted to drink until I went numb to the world. That wasn’t what I needed, though.
What I really needed stood a few feet away, watching me inspect the tonic, no doubt sensing the internal war I fought.
“I can do without for now,” I murmured as I passed the ether back to Sitri. “If the pain gets too bad, I’ll take some, but I don’t want to sleep right now. I want to be here. With you.”
Sitri smiled and stashed it in a drawer far outside my reach. “My, how much you’ve changed. I don’t think the human who arrived on my doorstep all those weeks ago would have thought twice about such a thing.”