Chapter 18 #2
Kywyn laid a troubled gaze on him. “I’m not sure the man he was left with was his actual father, and I’m certain Elenya compelled David to stay. She has Morgan’s magic just like the rest of their line.”
Wait, wait, wait.
He was…compelled to stay? Sean turned that idea over in his mind, letting the tiniest shred of compassion nudge its way in. David had been forced into that life unwillingly.
Forced not to leave, at least, but he wasn’t forced to participate, and he did it anyway.
“So what about my mother?” Sean asked.
Kywyn let out a humorless laugh. “She wouldn’t let me touch her.”
Sean snorted. “And you wore her down?”
“I didn’t try, but things happen sometimes.” He made a helpless gesture. “We’re pixies.”
Again, what did that have to do with anything? Sean almost asked, but those details weren’t important.
“So you gave her a bouncing baby boy.” He immediately regretted the bitter tone.
Kywyn flinched. “I named you Caden because she said you’d be a fighter. But she called you Seán.” His voice dropped to a whisper. “She said she liked the way it sounded.” A faint smile pulled at Kywyn’s mouth. “She gave me three months with you, then she left for good.”
“But why?” This was the part of the story Sean most wanted to know.
“She left no note. She didn’t say goodbye. I woke up that morning, and you were both gone. I searched everywhere in this realm, but Nish wouldn’t let me cross the mist no matter how I fought. I didn’t even know if you were still alive.”
“She didn’t tell you why?”
Kywyn shook his head and leveled him with a frank stare. “What happened to her, Sean? Blaire would only say that she’d rejoined the Light.”
His heart constricted. “She—she was killed.”
“Killed?” The stricken look on Kywyn’s face mirrored Sean’s feelings on the matter.
Sean fidgeted as he explained, “I came home and found her. They’d stabbed her. Stolen her jewelry. We never figured out who did it.”
“You found her? You?”
He closed his eyes, wishing the image wasn’t imprinted so vividly in his head. “In her bedroom. There was blood everywhere. She’d put up a fight.”
“Oh, my son.” Kywyn’s jaw slackened and his eyes went glassy. “And you were alone.”
“I wasn’t alone. I had Blaire. And Cole.”
Kywyn grimaced. “I’m—I’m so sorry.”
Sean lifted one shoulder. “I grieved, and I moved on.”
An utter lie. In his life, there’d been three constants: his mother, Aunt Blaire, and Cole.
When his mom died, Sean wasn’t sure he’d survive it.
His family’s support pulled him through the darkest time of his life, and even though the grief had shifted from relentless pain to occasional needles, he’d still been marked and changed by it.
He’d been an orphan desperately seeking somewhere to belong.
He was still that boy, wishing for a home.
Could this place really be the answer? Could Kywyn be the father he’d always wanted?
A moment elapsed while Kywyn clenched and unclenched his fists. His voice thickened. “So that’s the story, then. I’m sorry it’s not a better one.”
Sean stared at his father. “I used to ask about you.”
Kywyn’s ragged breath cut through the space between them.
“She said she loved you.”
Kywyn didn’t hide his tears.
“And she said that you loved me. She told me all the time.”
“I did,” Kywyn said, voice gruff. “I do.”
Sean’s heart squeezed out a few throbbing beats while he mastered the sudden urge to break things. How was he supposed to handle this? A…father. A man who’d wanted him from the moment of his conception but hadn’t been allowed to have him. A man who wanted him on a throne.
Putting some distance between himself and Kywyn, Sean focused on the glitter in the air. “I worry you expect great things from me. I don’t think I’m the man you’ve been waiting for.”
He turned to find Kywyn swiping a tear from his face. The older man’s eyes softened. “I’ve been waiting for you for decades. As to the rest of it, you’ll realize your destiny when you’re ready.”
“How do I know when I’m ready?”
“When you no longer deny it.”
Sean sighed. “That’s a shitty answer.”
Kywyn nodded like he agreed. “I’m afraid there will be many answerless questions.”
“Right.” He took a cleansing breath. “What’s the first step, then? Can you answer that one?”
“I can.” Kywyn approached and grasped Sean’s shoulders.
“You need to meet the Council. Isobel and Autumn were coronated as Sovereigns at age twenty, as is custom. You and David will need your crowns if you’re to take your rightful places.
You are an important member of our Council. You will help govern our people.”
But he didn’t want a crown. He didn’t want notoriety.
“What about you?” he asked. “Aren’t you the Sovereign?”
“I have served as Sovereign for a very long time. When you’re immortal, you don’t wait for death to usher in the new generation. It’s your turn now.”
Sean swallowed. He’d known it was coming, but still…
“And then you train,” his father said. “Lhynion Sidera was the best fighter the lavanié have ever known. You’ll follow his footsteps.”
“What about David? What if he follows Galadaine’s footsteps?”
Kywyn released his grip on Sean’s shoulders. “Focus on what you can control. The pieces will fall where they will.”
The pounding behind his eyebrows grew impossible to ignore. “Isobel says I need to put on a show. That the realm is depending on me to be a…Savior.”
“She isn’t wrong. With the Luster fading, people have grown desperate.
Zealots are out there, watching for any sign that you aren’t the man they expected.
Galadaine’s Followers want to see the Exorcism disbanded and seek your destruction.
When it all comes to a head, there could be rebellions. Riots. Insurrections.”
That squeezing feeling returned to Sean’s chest, making it hard to breathe. “I need time to adjust, to wrap my head around this. I don’t want to meet the Council. I don’t want to be coronated. I just…I need some time.”
His father pulled him in for a hug. “It’s okay. It’s fine. We’re immortal. We have the luxury of time.”
With a sinking feeling, Sean squeezed his eyes shut. “Why do I get the feeling that’s not exactly true?”
Kywyn released him. “Because it isn’t. But it’s okay sometimes to pretend that it is.”