12. Riot #2
I pushed the idea from my head and focused on my work.
I had about a dozen wind chimes that I put the finishing touches on and about ten medium-sized wind statues that were ready for display.
They were woodland-creature-themed and I was pleased with the way they turned out.
I turned on the industrial fan to see how they all looked when they moved together and I had to say, it excited me.
I went inside to wash up when my phone vibrated.
Katie
The Field Days committeeiswalking over to get a drink at Benny’s after themeeting, would you like to join?
The text surprised me. Katie didn’t invite me places, not public anyway.
She’d said I should make calculated public appearances, and that didn’t often include social gatherings.
The excuse was already at my fingertips.
But something about the idea of going to a bar with a group of people seemed so normal that I found myself putting a little extra effort into my appearance.
Ihatedthe way Ilookedwith my beard this long. The scarhadn’tbotheredme, I didn’t even notice it anymore. But to Katie, and the rest of the town, itwasa blatant reminder of my past.
It covers your smile, that’s all.
It was the second time that week I let Nicolette’s words come back to me and a sudden feeling of decisiveness washed over me.
I was tired of hiding. I pulled out my trimmers and made quick work of cleaning myself up, bringing my beard down.
It was still full, but at least it looked kempt.
I didn’t know if Nicolette would be there but she was on that committee now and butterflies hummed in my stomach .
When Ipulledinto the parking lot of Benny’s Bar, Iignoredthe whispers and looks Igot. Ithadbeena long time sinceI’dbeen out socially and therewasa levity in my chest I couldn’t quite explain.
I wasn’t sure why I questioned whether Nicolette would be out tonight. Benny’s Bar was not Katie’s scene and when I walked in, I could tell Nicolette had been the ringleader in setting it up.
Her tall blonde ponytail was the first thing my eyes landed on.
People surrounded Nicolette. Her voice was full of laughter, speaking animatedly with her hands.
She was like the bright flame they were all attracted to, her barstool fixed in the center while committee members circled her, enrapt with her story and charm.
The local dive bar was dark, but still, our eyes met and I swore something brightened in her.
A slow smile crept across her face as I nervously ran a hand down my chin, shuffling my feet in place.
She slid off the barstool, raking her eyes over my face as she began to move toward me like I was her flame.
Our eye line was severed when Katie ran up and threw her arms around my neck.
“Riot!I’mso glad youcame!”I could smell a slight tinge of beer on her breath andI’dneverknownher to drink anything stronger than coffee, but here shewas.
My eyes flashed back to Nicolette, who had sat back down and was returning to her conversation. Purposefully ignoring me. She tucked away a playful smirk and my chest tightened.
“Yeah, thanks for the invite.” I pulled Katie’s arms down and gave her a friendly nod.
“How’d the meeting go?” I asked, casually walking toward the group of people surrounding Nicolette.
Katie followed close on my heels, explaining how well everything was coming along and that despite her initial skepticism, she was impressed with how much Nicolette could add to the group.
I stopped in front of Nicolette. It had only been a few hours since I left her, but against the backdrop of the bar, something seemed different. It seemed right. Familiar. Not in the sense she reminded me of the past. But familiar like she felt like now. A promise of safety .
“Hi,” I said, shoving my hands in my pockets.
“Hey,”shesaid, too casually, taking a sip of a beer, masking a wry grin. I know shewastrying, but fuck , shelookedcool. I don’t know why itmademe want to smile.“This looks better.”Shetwirledher finger,motioningto my face, still unwilling to make eye contact.
“What’s that?” I played dumb. It was childish, but I was eager to hear the words my ego so desperately craved.
I caught a brief eye roll before she tilted her head to meet my gaze.
The air vibrated between us. Her eyes looked just a hint droopier.
From the beer or otherwise, it made my groin tighten.
“This.”Her eyesdippedto my mouth.“I like what you did with it.”I expect her to go back to her conversation but her eyes staypinnedon my lips. Or beard. Probably beard. It makes me smile nonetheless.
I leaned toward her like she was gravity. “Careful, Nicolette.” My words come out more gravelly than playful. “Your pupils are dilating.” Her breath got caught on a muffled giggle and we were close enough that I could lean in so easily to press my mouth to her—
“Okay, so Nicolette, you’ll finish the press release and Iwillscrub the distribution list,”an older womaninterjected,pullingus out of our little bubble.
“Think we’ll get some coverage this year? Since wewererunner-up for the grant last year?”askedanother older gentleman.
“I wouldn’t count on it. I’ve submitted and called every year but no one ever answers me,” Katie whined.
Nicolette’s eyes narrowed in her direction before she pulled her phone out and started tapping.
“I think we’re better off concentrating our efforts on flyers and getting them posted on community boards in the neighboring towns. I can take—”
“Donnie?” Nicolette’s powerful voice cut Katie off.
She rose from the barstool and stood up, her phone pressed to her ear.
“Hey, it’s Nicolette Parker, how are you?
” She paused, and I cringed at how high-pitched her voice sounded.
“It’s been forever, yes I was in Easton for a while.
Well, hey the reason for my call…” The sound of her voice drifted out of the bar .
“Can you believe her?” Katie scowled at one of the women to her right. “I get it, you worked in media, whatever.” She rolled her eyes dramatically.
“I mean, it’s kind of nice tohavethe additional help…”a younger womanoffered.
“Are you taking her side?” Katie accused.
“Aren’t we all working on the same side?” the gentleman asked.
As Katie began to protest, Nicolette swept back in. “You are such a doll, thank you. I will send you the pitch story by tomorrow morning at the latest!”
Everyone’s eyes were fixed on her and it was hard for me to hide my smile when she sat down, ignoring everyone’s stares. She took a long sip of beer, letting it land back on the bar.
“We’ll be in the Sunday edition of the Huntington Herald. I need some high-quality photos from last year, please.”
One of the guys high-fived her.“How the heck did you get that done so fast?”
Nicoletteshrugged.“One of my old co-workers from my internshipisthe associate news director for AB Media, which owns all the newspapers in the tri-state area.”
The pleased smiles were hard to ignore and even though I had no right to be, I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t proud of her.
As the eveningworeon, a strange sense of homesettledin.
I neverhadthe chance to feel like an adult, to drink, legally, with friends, and feel somewhat of agrown-up.
I’dspentmy twenty-first birthday in prison.
And by now, all my high school and college buddieshadmovedon.
Married. Kids. Something I was unlikely to ever have.
A pangresonatedin my gut when Ithoughtof all the lifeI’dmissedout on .
I had never welcomed boring conversation more than when Nicolette and I played a little game of tag with our eyes, stealing glances at one another but unwilling to get caught staring.
There was an unease to the comfort I was settling into and I wondered how much of that was me getting back to my life and how much of it was Nicolette, making me want to get back to my life.
As Iwatchedher, casually listening to her committee members, Istudiedthe way the dips and curves of her neckarchedwhen shethrewher head back. Golden strands of hairdancedover her shoulders and the urge to pull out that ponytail and weave my fingers through itgrippedme.
Shut that down. You’re her landlord and she’s leaving.
It felt wholly unfair. I spent ten years sitting still while life went on without me. The idea of watching Nicolette walk away from Godot, probably forever, felt like I was getting cheated. I wanted to be near her and it felt refreshing to admit that to myself.
Her back leaned against the bar when I sidled up next to her. Her elbows rested on the oak surface behind her. Leaning over the bar, I let my shoulder brush against her arm. Small goosebumps appeared on her forearm.
“Seems like youfounda nice little niche here.”Inoddedto the rest of the committee members.
Nicolettegaveme a sarcastic glare.“It’s amazing what people don’t know they don’t know.”
“Still,” I gazed up at her through a few strands of hair that fell in front of my face. “It’s generous you’re doing it. I can’t imagine you’re getting much out of the Field Days committee for your big drug story.” She stiffened slightly, gazing down into her near-empty beer bottle.
Unspoken wordshungon her lips like icicles. Her jawmovedup and down. Her lower lipwasstill damp from her last sip and Iresistedthe urge to swipe it with my thumb. Sherotatedtoward me and her eyesliftedto mine.
“You’re going to have to pick up a copy of the Huntington Herald at the grocery store, though,” I said, trying to ease the simmering tension that had thickened.
She quirked an eyebrow up. “They had some of the worst, most aggressive reporters.” I shook my head at the memory of the gossip columnists camped on my lawn.
“I forbid the mailman from leaving any of their rags in our mailbox.” I offered a chuckle but Nicolette’s face paled slightly before twisting her lips into a forced grin.
I chastised myself, hoping I hadn’t offended her. “I didn’t mean—”
“Hey, did you eat?” she interrupted me.
Ishookmy head.“Grab a pizza on the way home?”
Shesmiled, the tension from moments agomeltedoff entirely.“If we hustle, we can catch the repeat of Jeopardy! and see howaggravatedBrennan gets when he can’t answer the pop culture references.”
I couldn’t help but warm with the familiarity in her voice. As Imadea quick round of goodbyes, I could tell Katiewantedto talk more. But I didn’t give her the opportunity.
Thehushedwhispers and wide eyes thatfollowedNicolette and I leavingtogether didn’t go unnoticed. It would cause the rumor mill to startswirling. Wespilledout into the cool, late spring nighttime. Ipulledthe passenger door open before sheclimbedinto the seat.
What would people say? What would they think?
As shepulledthe seatbelt across her body, almost in slow motion, no part of me could muster the concern to care.