Chapter 9
Rain
What came over me?
The question repeats in my mind, a rhythmic loop that nags repeatedly in my head as I lay flat on my back, staring straight up at the ceiling.
Make him fall in love.
Those were my mother’s words. Yet, the very first tool I reached for was seduction. A reckless game of touch and tease.
Should I just divorce him? I consider the thought, then shake my head into the room.
It feels like an outrageous, desperate leap to throw six years away.
But the reality is stark: I have been starved of intimacy for far too long, surviving on crumbs.
How am I supposed to navigate this new, uncharted territory?
I let out a long sigh and sit up, pushing the covers aside.
Cody booked a driver this morning to take him to the school to pick up the kids because of his leg.
A quick glance at the clock confirms the kids will be home any minute.
I head downstairs to the kitchen, opening the refrigerator to slide the containers into the microwave.
I have to give him credit for the gesture; hiring a chef to take the burden of cooking off my shoulders was a rare, thoughtful move.
The low vibration of the appliance fills the kitchen, interrupted a moment later by the ring of the doorbell.
I abandon the counter and she runs toward the door.
I pull the door wide open. For the first time in a very long time, I am the one standing on the threshold to welcome my children home.
A smile breaks across my face at the instant burst of excitement in their eyes.
They launch themselves forward, latching onto my clothes, their voices combining into a loud chorus of "Mummy! "
Samuel wraps his arms tightly around my waist, burying his face in my clothes. "I missed you, Mummy."
The sweetness of his voice hits me in the chest. "Such a beautiful child," I murmur, smoothing down his hair.
I look up, my gaze traveling past his small shoulders. Cody stands just inside the doorway, balancing his weight on his crutches.
"Hey, Rain," he says. A soft smile touches his lips.
Samuel untangles himself from my legs, giving me space to lift Rose into my arms. She clings to me instantly, her small hands locking tightly behind my neck.
"Daddy has something for you," Samuel chirps, hopping from one foot to the other on the rug.
My eyes remain locked on Cody. "Oh, he does?"
"Yes, yes he does!" Samuel bounces, his face splitting into a wide grin.
Cody shifts his grip on the crutches. With a movement, he whips a single flower from behind his back, holding it out toward me.
I go still. Warmth floods my chest, trapping the air in my lungs. I stare at the bloom, then up at his face, my mind struggling to process the visual. The only word my brain can muster slips past my lips. "Flowers."
He offers a chuckle, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "Flowers."
I carefully set Rose back down on her feet so I can accept the stem. The soft petals feel cool against my fingers. "Shut the door behind you," I tell him, noticing he is still hovering near the open entrance.
He nudges the door closed with the edge of his crutch, the latch clicking into place.
"Thank you," I say again, the flower held against my chest.
Cody releases one grip, opening his arm wide for a hug.
His eyes dart toward Samuel, a silent, pointed look reminding me of our agreement—the performance we promised to put on for the children.
I give a tight nod, stepping into his space.
I wrap my free arm around his shoulders.
He pulls me inward, his hold tightening until I am pressed firmly against his chest. It is a bit too firm, the pressure boundary slipping, but I find myself refusing to complain about the man in front of me.
"Kiss! Kiss!" Samuel begins to chant from the floor.
I look down at him, my cheeks burning. The moment Samuel pauses to catch his breath, Rose takes over the rhythm. She points a small, authoritative finger straight at her father.
"Daddy, kiss Mummy. Okay?"
A breathless laugh escapes both of us at her tone. She delivers the command with the gravity of a judge.
I keep my eyes trained on the kids, deliberately avoiding the gaze of the man in front of me. "Oh, kids, Daddy's leg is—"
Before I can finish the excuse, his hand sneaks around my waist, his fingers digging into the fabric of my shirt. A tiny yelp escapes my throat, followed instantly by the delighted giggles of our children.
"Cody," I warn under my breath.
"Just because my legs are bad doesn't mean I can't sneak in a kiss or two," he profession.
He leans down, closing the distance before I can move. His lips meet mine in a short, firm press. It lasts only a few seconds, but it leaves my mind dazed, the room spinning slightly when he pulls back.
"Yes, Daddy!" Samuel screams, clapping his hands together.
Cody pulls his head back a fraction of an inch, his dark eyes remaining fixed on my mouth. His thumb strokes the side of my waist through my shirt before he finally lets go. He leans closer, his lips brushing the shell of my ear as he drops his voice to a whisper.
"I don't think that was practice."
He straightens up, a knowing look in his eyes, and shifts back onto his crutches. "Alright, kids. Let's go have a bath."
I remain frozen in the center of the room, the flower limp in my hand.
"Look," Samuel's voice cuts through my stupor as he points at me. "Mummy liked the kiss so much she can't even speak."
I laugh at his spot-on observation.
***
Hours later, the house is dark and silent. We are both lying in the vast bed, the distance between us remaining wide but charged with a strange, lingering heat. I stare up at the ceiling, the stillness pressing against my ears.
"What are we doing?" I ask into the dark.
"I don't know," his voice carries from the other side of the mattress.
"Do you think... staying here longer is making you act different?"
"Yes," he says without hesitation. "I think so."
A chuckle escapes him, the sound vibrating in the room. The mattress rustles as he shifts his weight. I turn my head on the pillow to look at him. He has rolled onto his side, his posture slightly awkward as he stares across the expanse between us.
I turn back, facing the ceiling once more, my knuckles gripping the edge of the sheet. "What about your love?"
"We could move on," he says, his voice steady, dropping the words into the dark like heavy stones. "Forget about her."
The declaration snaps my head back toward him. My breath hits. "What made you change your mind?"
The bedroom feels too still as I wait for his response, my pulse ticking loud in my ears.
"You and the kids," he says softly.
I give a slow nod, my chest tightening.
"You're a great woman, Rain. A good mother and a good wife," he continues, his gaze locked onto mine. "And when I watched you with the kids today... I just thought, what is stopping you from giving this woman your all?"
My heart beats faster. Is this it? I think, the reality of the moment crashing down on me. Is this the night the walls finally crumble and we become a real couple? I hold my breath, waiting for him to finish.
"I want to let myself fall in love with you, Rain," he says out loud.
The admission sends a wave of heat straight to my core. My heart hammers against my ribcage so hard it feels painful. I open my mouth, but no sound comes out; I am terrified of the fragile, trembling nature of my voice right now.
"And these past few days," he murmurs, his voice softening even further, "I can say it is not so hard to fall in love with a woman as beautiful as you."
A sting hits the back of my eyes, moisture blurring his outline in the dim light. For years, I have wished for this. I have dreamed of him saying these exact words to me in this very room, and now he is finally letting go of the ghost between us.
An emotional chuckle escapes me, and I quickly cover my face with both hands, trying to shield my vulnerability. A sudden dampness touches my palms—tears of joy escaping before I can stop them.
"Come here," he says, stretching his arm across the wide gap of the mattress.
I slide over, leaving the empty space behind, and fall into his embrace. He pulls me securely against his chest, tucking his chin over the top of my head as he cradles my weight.
"Thank you for holding this house down," he whispers into the darkness. "Thank you for being a good woman. A better wife. And the best mother."
He leans down, pressing a soft, lingering kiss to the side of my neck. Suddenly, a groan cuts off his breath.
I shift, pulling back to look at his face. We both burst into a sudden laugh as I realize his injured leg has become twisted awkwardly among the pile of pillows, the sprained ankle catching on the fabric.
"Sorry," I tell him, my hand resting on his chest.
Cody shakes his head, his shoulders still shaking with amusement as he waves the pain away.
Driven by the sudden surge of happiness—or perhaps a need to seal this new promise before it can slip away—I reach up. I cup his face in both of my hands, my palms catching the heat of his skin, and lean in to kiss him.
He responds instantly. His arm clamps around my waist, pulling me tightly against his body as he intensifies the pressure of his mouth against mine. I smile against his lips, the taste of him filling my senses.
"We should do this often," I breathe against his skin.
He pulls back just a fraction of an inch, his dark eyes fierce in the shadows. "Yeah. I think we really should."
He leans back down, capturing my mouth in another breathtaking kiss.
As I lose myself in the warmth of his breathing, a cold fear pricks at the back of my mind. A single, gnawing question shadows the joy: What if the woman in question comes back to actively chase him?
I don't pull away from his mouth. I push the thought down, deepening the embrace. A woman in love can easily play the fool, and tonight, I am perfectly willing to be a fool for Cody.